My wife, of 12 yrs, and I just about went through with a divorce. She said she wasn't happy, but I said all the right things and did the right things throughout the 2 months of Hell, that had her emotions swinging back and forth. The reason she came back though is because she thought that I had given up and started to have a relationship with someone else. This is 100% not true! The problem now is she doesn't trust me at all. We are getting along pretty good, and it is obvious that the love we once had is still there, but her not trusting me really hurts. I know the common answer is going to be "It'll take time", but there has to be some things that I can do to convince her that I have never cheated on her, and never will. Anyone got any advice?
2007-01-31 12:05:24 · 10 answers · asked by s_cski 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She's putting you in a really difficult spot. All you can do is keep being truthful, honest and as understanding as you can be. Hopefully, your actions will prove to her that you are still the faithful man you've always been.
2007-01-31 12:11:34 · answer #1 · answered by katydid 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you considered romancing her? I mean, go out on dates with your wife. Take her places for a nice dinner, if you can, breakfast, lunch once in awhile, bring her flowers. And yes, talk with her. Even before you do the "dating" her again. Let her know you didn't, and won't cheat. And tell her why. And, let her know that you want to "date" her, not just a short while-but at least once- twice a month, for the rest of the years you have with her.(if that would be true).Plus, date nights, don't have to cost much. A picnic, a walk in a park, or at the beach.Just time together, the two of you, working on your relationship. Have you told her lately what things you love/appreciate about her? Have you considered counseling for the two of you, to help with communication? I wish you the best. Take care.
2007-01-31 12:31:51 · answer #2 · answered by SAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you my husband? :) If a person survives a plane crash, they may get on a plane again, but it will never be the same. I am scarred. I do believe my husband cheated on me although he says he didn't. I feel that what he did just brought about every single insecurity I had in myself and multiplied it exponentially. What you have on your side is the truth. It always comes out, even if it's after years. Do little things like leave your cell in accessible areas, your briefcase, or any other personal things. Make it evident that you're not hiding anything. Open your email and leave the computer on and go out, giving her an opportunity to look if she wishes to do so. Romance is always the frosting on the cake. It will make the time you need to heal go by that much quicker. And I do believe it's time. For me, its been over a year and I still get horrible, "what if's" that make my stomach churn. Best of luck to you.
2007-01-31 16:37:05 · answer #3 · answered by lola 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't need to do anything to prove that you haven't cheated on her. the problem lies with her. she is going to have to make up her mind about how she wants to go through life. she has a choice. she can decide to trust you, and have a happy life with you, or she can choose not to trust you and make both your lives miserable. if you haven't cheated and you've told her that, then you've done what you needed to do. now the rest is up to her. stop wearing yourself out to try and win her trust when you've done nothing wrong. she is punishing you for something that you did not do, and it needs to stop or she will end up ruining the relationship.
Best Wishes With Everything
2007-01-31 12:24:47 · answer #4 · answered by atiana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
best thing is call it quits and move on..life my be tough for awhile but well it never is the same again..You are fighting and endless battle that there will never be a winner. let it go ,life is too short to just keep going through all that
2007-01-31 13:40:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her what you just asked us. Talk to her. Find out what she needs from you. Good luck.
2007-01-31 12:19:19 · answer #6 · answered by Tracie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a tough one....ask her what she would like you to do, to prove your love for her
2007-01-31 12:16:18 · answer #7 · answered by veronica c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a lie detector test.
That should prove it to her.
2007-01-31 12:12:07 · answer #8 · answered by Tarro 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she don't want to stay in the marrige divorce her
2007-02-04 04:44:29 · answer #9 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how u feel.
2007-01-31 12:09:28 · answer #10 · answered by $Mz.Nina aka Baby G$ 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋