o.k. let me ask this a different way my husband says the affair was 3yrs his ex mistress says 5yrs?

Question

he says she says i have stayed with the man and he says it is time to move on "would luv to!" just can not do it .much harder then i thought we have a 14yr old and i am just feeling like one day i hate him and the next day i can do this. my feelings are so twisted and it has taken its toll on me.would luv to just be happy again it seems a long distant memory"i miss the old me"she is an ex porn star he says it doesn't matter what she was i see her web sites it makes me sick i know" don't look "cain't help it.i even met her she really wasn't all that but i know once she met me she knew he was full of **** and it just made matters worse.i guess what i am ranting about is will these feelings ever go away????is there hope????

Answer 1

OK, does it matter? Are you staying with him, then it doesn't matter how long it is, forgive him and get on with it.

If you're leaving him, the it doesn't matter, get on with it.

"I miss the old me" When someone is depressed or dwells on stressful issues for too long, it can actually change the brain chemistry. You could have altered your brain chemistry in a negative way, making it nearly impossible to be positive. Seek therapy, seek medication, and start to change your way of thinking no matter what you do. You can change your brain chemistry to become a happier or a sad person, whether you stay with him or not, you are no the same as you were.

For your sake, for your kids, for his sake, make the changes in your life to be happy again.

Answer 2

Start letting go. Life is too short to spend dwelling on something you cannot change. Try to realize that you can't make him think and feel the way you want him to and focus on yourself. There's a whole world of people and possibilites out there...

Answer 3

The SOONER you exit this situation the BETTER your going to feel. And the good news is there are many nice decent men in the world who will treat you right! Hang in there!!