how would you feel if your wife of 12 years tells you she wants to have threesome with you and another female?

Question

should i feel like its cheating or should i get excited?

Answer 1

I think most people think it sounds exciting but it is cheating, any way you want to look at it AND you have to think, is this her way of wanting to try someone else in a guilt-free way? Is she curious about having a lesbian affair or does she want to try another guy? You must decide this. AND you also must realize that if you go along with it it may totally ruin your marriage from the jealousy that either of you may feel afterward OR that either of you may want to do it again and the other one does not. A lot to ponder.

Answer 2

Depends on how you feel about opening-up your marriage to others. Done right, by the right people, for the right reasons, it can be a fun and enlightening experience that brings you closer together.

Done for the wrong reasons, by the wrong people it can be disastrous.

What do I mean by "wrong reasons". Well, if it is being used to "fix" a relationship, it won't. It'll just cause more problems. If it is being used to "get more action", then again, it is the wrong reason. You need to fix what is wrong in your relationship that is causing you not to get enough action there first.

What is the "wrong people"? Those that are the jealous sort. Those that coerce or manipulate their partner into doing things against their will. Not just sex, but anything and everything in the relationship.

What's the right reason? To help your partner live out their fantasies while you live out your own.

Who are the right people? Those with a loving, trusting, jealousy-free relationship that also already have great sex together and that want to broaden their horizons and explore their sexuality together, as a couple.

For some good, objective, and real information from those that have been there, and those that are just going there (like you), check-out The Swingers Board http://www.swingersboard.com . You'll find lots of good info there.

Oh, and as a post comment... sharing is not cheating. Cheating is deceiving your partner and having sex with others without their knowledge and/or consent. Swinging is not cheating because you are doing it with the full knowledge and blessings of your partner.

Answer 3

I think its interesting that she wants a threesome with another woman rather than another man. I would question that. Maybe she is just looking for a way to spice things up between the two of you or maybe she has a curiosity about other women. I would find out for sure so you know exactly which direction you need to go with this. You sound like a decent guy for being so concerned instead of just going for it. Good luck to you.

Answer 4

Ask her this... Honey, would it be alright if I just watched first for 10 or 15 minutes? If she says yes, She is Bisexual and has been hiding it from you.

If she says no, ask her this... Why do you want to see me with another woman? This can also lead to, Are you then going to want to have a threesome with another man?

Now, ask yourself, how would you feel seeing your wife with another man? Do you consider it cheating or do you get excited.

Answer 5

I think you should be very cautious, in some cases this type of thing causes a lot of problems. It may be something she wants to do once or twice, or she my be more interested in the other women then you. You need to decide if it's worth the risk. On the other hand I have a friend that does this all the time with his wife and they have been happily married for many years. Good luck!

Answer 6

I cant imagine why she'd be as jealous as she is. Did you per chance supply the different female better interest or evaluate both? those are not any no's. yet when none of that occurred, then she is being very unfair. ok, so this fantasy grew to grow to be out to be something she couldn't cope with yet she made a call and ok, dont do it again. Her reaction is unreasonable. in case you understand that you probably did not do something that ought to have made her sense inadequate compared to the different female, than deliver her an digital mail or plant life with a card on account that she isn't speaking. tell her you do not forget that this grew to grow to be out to be better effective left as a fantasy and decide to understand why she is offended. you want her and fee your marriage and decide a lot for her to open as a lot as you about whats hurting her. You dont decide on something like this to harm your marriage.

Answer 7

That depends on how tight you two are. If there are ANY jealousys between the both of you, then there will be problems. But if you know that this other women is there only for fun and sex, then there shouldn't be any problems.

If you feel like you two really love each other, then job on the chance! Not many men are giving this kind of offer in their lives! And even fewer who are married!

Just be sure there are no relationship snags and everything should be alright!

Answer 8

Well it depends on you, there are no rules..many men like this sort of thing, but many also don't and some even find it revolting, there could be several reasons why she is bringing this up, one, which I think is the most likely is that she is trying to spice up your love life another could be more serious and that she is bisexual and even having relations with that other woman. You need to sit down and speak with her, find out her reasons. If you are not into it tell her, and maybe you can try other things. Hope that helps.

Answer 9

I'm not sure how I'd feel, but in my case there is 0% chance of that ever happening. Is it something you've thought about in the past? Have you discussed it with your wife before? Give it some thought, but don't be afraid to go with your gut.

Answer 10

It's only cheating if you feel it is. Just do what feels right to you. A lot of people find it exciting.