"I'm not going to be a housewife." & "Wake up, it's time to feed the baby."?

Question

How often do women, in an act of mislead feminism, expect their man to do an equal or greater amount of the work that is traditionally the work of women, even though the man works more hours outside the home at a higher stress level than she does? I understand that if the man almost never gets up to feed the baby, even if the woman get's to take a nap the next day, that's not right. I also know there are a lot of men that think that since they work harder outside the home that they don't have to to anything around the house. I'm not referring to those situations. I'm referring to women who refuse to do their fair share of traditional "women's work" to make a statement.

I'm aware that this is probably rare. But, it is extremely damaging to the perception of women when it does happen. My Ex-wife did this. To be honest, I'm just here finding trying to learn how to spot a mislead feminist, because that's what's hidden in too many intelligent women.

Wholly crap, what a range of answers. At least 1/3 of you didn't really read my question thoroughly.

Answer 1

not all women think and act like yor ex, Get over it!

Answer 2

I don't think that household duties should be shirked to "make a statement." I agree that that is not fair. Nor should men never contribute at all, because it's "women's work." It depends on how much each person works outside the home. If both work, then they should take turns getting up with the baby...but if one is going to stay home, then THAT person should do the majority of the house work, and get up with the baby. I do plan on staying home when my husband and I have a baby, and while he has already said we could take turns, I would not THINK of letting him get so little sleep, and having to go to work the next day, when I could catch bits of sleep whenever the baby sleeps (hopefully). But I would like for him to feed the baby when he comes home...not to "give me a break," but because it is a terrific form of bonding, and I want him to have that joy, too. Just not in the middle of the night. However, if I were going to continue to work, I would expect us to take turns...that's only fair. But as far as "making a statement"...that's silly. BUT if each person works outside the home an equal amount, then there should be an equal division of labor in the home.

Answer 3

How about because we get fed up with being the "homemaker", or the "housewife".Come on people it's 2007, and lets face it things aren't the same as they used to be. We no longer have many of the traditions and customs as we had back in the day. Besides what is so wrong with cleaning up after yourself? Furthermore, it takes two to be in a relationship and both need to put some effort. Whether it be house chores, physically, and emotionally.If the man works more hours than the female then I do agree that he might be too tired, or exhausted. But that does not excuse him from doing his share of the work. It's more of a mutual thing now.

Answer 4

in the situation you describe, *when the woman isn't employed* she should do most of the housework, as she is a housewife. that's not to say that she should be a maid, picking up after her husband 24/7. there is such a thing as consideration, and each person should 'pick up after themselves' so to speak, at least most of the time. by this i mean not being a total slob, leaving dirty laundry wherever it may fall, dishes all over the house, etc. at least put things in the hamper/sink/etc. that wouldn't be close to half of the housework.
i had an issue getting that through my exhusbands head, and he seemed to think that because he worked outside the home (and i was *only* a full time student) he shouldn't have to do anything but open his beer when he got home (and leave the caps everywhere!) and if i so much as asked him to put his dirty clothes in the conveniently located hamper i would be assaulted with verbal abuse "worthless lazy nagging b*itch who drives me to drinking" was usually the gist. being so underappreciated made me kinda lose the motivation to do the housework, so i stopped cleaning the house from top to bottom every week like i was... actually i stopped coming home...

but i think whoever is working less should do proportionately more of the housework. for example, i currently work full time (4- 10hr days +1- 5hr) and my husband is looking for work; he does all the housework during the week (plus all his own laundry) and i do nearly none. but on the weekends, i do an equal share (and my own laundry). when he's working he does less and i do more. fair is fair.

EDIT: i just want to say that taking care of a baby is really hard work (& i don't know how hard, yet) and very stressful, and BOTH parents should equally parent when they are both home. and honestly, cleaning an entire house every week (floors, bathrooms, kitchen, dusting, the whole bit) is hard also, harder (physically) than the engineering job i have now!

Answer 5

This is not about women. this is about laziness on the part of either. me and my husband both work full time. when we are at home, we both share equally in doing the household chores. this is how it should be and the women who dont are just lazy, not trying to make a statement.

in the case where a women is not working outside the home, yes, she should probably do a lot more around the house than the husband who does work outside the home. but that does not mean that the man should get off scott free. the woman is working all day as well, and that should be recognised. she is not just sitting there watching tv. once the man gets home, whatever else needs to be done (eg. the dishes, feeding the dog, bathing the baby) should be shared between the two of them.

Answer 6

I would rather be a mislead feminist that an ignorant sexist. I work as many hours as my husband does, and I have no intention of coming home and doing what was traditionally considered women's work. A sense of mutuality is necessary for a relationship to be equitable. I feel that since a woman is home taking care of the home and children all day that it is up to the male to take the time to bond with his own children. When a man doesn't bond with his children they grow up to be frustrated and unhappy. They generate a great deal of anger and frustration and tend to project onto the rest of society. Children without strong parental nurturing turn into frustrated adults. By the way I take it your father did not bond much with you? Well I guess that explains all of your questions.

Answer 7

Have you ever been a SAHM??? How much stress do you think that is??? I have worked outside the home and I am now a SAHM, and let me tell you, I am more stressed now then I was then. And my hubby doesn't do much at home but sit on his a**. B/c he is 'tired'. Well, I say, suck it up and grow up. Life is hard and nobody is gonna do it for ya. If I left it up to him, we would be living in filth and our bills wouldn't get paid and our 4 children would never have clean clothes, dishes to eat off of, or go to school. So, I don't wanna hear your BS about women expecting too much f/ their men.

Answer 8

men and women are missing the point on this one, it is what ever is best for the child, if that means that if dad doesn't get enough sleep and get fired, baby has no food, if that means that dad has to suck it up and feed baby in the middle of the night because mommy is having post pardom depression and need the sleep do deal with that and baby then that is the amswer. It is going to vary parents need to start working as a team

Answer 9

In modern times, women are actually dealing with more. They have jobs and work at home. Men are just as capeable. I understand diffrent jobs=diffrent stress levels, but the work is equal at home. The child is the responsiblility of the parents, not the mother or father alone.

Answer 10

Expectations, feminists have told women they can expect ANY man to help around the house even after work, no matter if she works or not. If she does not work, then sitting in front of the tv breastfeeding, changing, diapers, operating a washinmachine becomes work. If he disagrees and says the chores can be done in the 10 hours he is at work, then he is mean and evil and presto, she has a justification to cash out in divorce court and claim his house.

Answer 11

WOW most women here won't admit your right. Niccichistis you say taking care of a kid by yourself who sleeps probably 15 hours a day (so you can watch TV, etc... and basically do anything as long as you stay home or take your kid with you) and you say this is more stressful and harder than being a powerplant worker, fireman, cop, lawyer, doctor, etc?

Now she's a mislead feminists!