How can I make our sex life better with my boyfriend?

Question

I had lost my virginity since sept 06`. Till this day I noticed that I haven't get pleasure from sexual intercourse with my boyfriend (maybe once or twice). But besides that, no pleasure. And I don't know if it's a problem or not, but he ALWAYS finish before me (organism), and I don't know if thats a problem of me not getting pleasured for long? How can I make our sex life better? Please help! Thanks, I really appreacited folks!<333

Answer 1

You are normal, women need more sexual stimulation to reach climax then men do.

You need to teach your boyfriend about foreplay. Acts that he does to you that excite you and puts you into a more sexual mood BEFORE he starts intercourse. There are little games that you can play as well; play role games where you act out your fantasies. Have him grow a little beard stubble and put on a Justin Timberlake CD and lip sing to the song, then you play the groupie that sneaks back stage for a wild passionate affair (if you like Justin Timberlake that much).

Bondage games can be exciting. Use a pair of silk scarves and tie your boyfriend’s hands to the bed and then sexually stimulate him. Then let him do the same thing to you. If you do this then you need to have a key word that is unrelated like Pizza, or Saddam Hussein. You or your partner uses the keyword when something goes beyond the line. Some women like to be spanked. You might try it yourself, if it gets to be too much though then you say your control word and the spanking stops. This way you can get into it and scream, “No, no, don’t hurt me!” As the poor little slave girl or whatever you game is.

There are special oils and scents that you can use to heighten the experience. There are lickable water based gels that can be used to smooth things over or to improve the taste of other areas. These same shops or websites also carry sexual games and other “martial aids” that all have the idea of bringing a new life to your sex life.

Go on line and shop for something sexy that you both like, you can even get costumes and wigs to help your role play games.

Make him wear a thicker condom. The male reaches climax quickly so if you slow him down then you can reach it together. If you have him use a desensitizing cream then make sure it is inside of his condom so it won’t reduce your sensation.

A male would be intimidated if you tried to use a vibrator on him, but you might like it if he used it on you. They make all kinds including a small one that fits on the end of your finger. If he uses that then he can give you a sexy massage.

Engage in a little anal sex, again you will need a keyword. He won’t have as much depth there as with normal intercourse, but you might like it. When you first try it have him insert one finger and play around, then two fingers, and finally three fingers (he can cover them with condoms). If you are comfortable with that and he is gentle then you can have a good session.

Have him masturbate before he has sex with you, or give him oral sex or something similar. If he climaxes before you have sex then it will take him longer to reach a second climax.

There are two key ideas here. First try and get him to prolong his erection, a cock ring will lock the blood into his member so it stays harder. Second he needs to excite you more before you can let him in for his fun. Don’t be afraid to add more to your sex life, as long as your both agree, it is done in private, and no one gets hurt then it should be okay.

I have one final word of advice. Watch the Oxygen Network on Sunday nights at 11:00 pm eastern time/10:00 pm central time for the show “Talk Sex with Sue Johanson.” She has a very frank show designed to improve a couple’s sexual relationship. I do warn you that she can be quite explicit, but she has some good advice that could help you (some of the advice I have given above came from her show). Otherwise you are going to be one of those women who are sexually unsatisfied in your relationship. You need to explain this to your partner, and do it with “I statements.” The problem isn’t with him, he can perform, but it is that you need more.

Another good hint is the after sex. When a man reaches his climax he puts 90% of his energy into it. After that most want to fall asleep, but most women are still on a sexual high after sex and they don’t want to go to bed right away. Tell him that this is the time when he needs to tell you that he loves you, that he needs you, and that he loves you. You don’t need him to give you a long conversation; only five minutes. But, to women the most important thing out of a sexual relationship is the relationship itself. To men the most important thing in a sexual relationship is just the sex. Both of you need to work together to keep your relationship a happy one.

Another hint comes from how men approach sex. Men are more goal orientated and the sex act itself is often enough. Women are the one who want it to be special, so YOU need to see to that. If you think a bath with champagne is a good idea then you need to set it up and surprise him with it. You need to lay the path of rose petals on the floor leading to your bath, and have the candles lighted and ready. He will enjoy the act even more, just like you will, but few men think about doing things this way. You need to put the spice into the relationship to get him thinking on this path and you need to make your wants and desires clear to him. Do that and both of you will be happier.

Answer 2

This is the time to start talking to your man, maybe he doesn't know how!! and that's not a bad thing. So talk and learn together if you don't tell him he will always be selfish. and you will be left not pleased! Buy some books, buy sexy gear and some heels, rent a movie, and strawberry oil take the lead and show him that exploring can be fun!!! You already have the upper hand your just not using your born gift! Stop having sex for a few days and start talking. Of course he will get upset and if he does that's a red flag!!! For you to see where things really stand in your relationship. So then talk some more, I have been with my man for over 7 yrs and at times I let him be selfish and that's ok. He and I have had great talks and he understand that I have feelings and wants also, therefore he isn't selfish 3 days out of the week. You must talk first!!! GL

Answer 3

hmmm. OK sometimes... ( a lot fo the time) women cant orgasm from initial sex. the guy has to work a little harder. Are you trying other positions? if you get on top of him with him lying down alot of the time you can grind yourself onto him the way you like. you get a lot more control over what it feels like for you. Try lube! it is nice for both partners. A waterbased one is sufficient. Dont be afraid to bring up new positions or DIRECT him the way you would like. I was shy at first but when i tell him what id like he enjoys it a lot more as well. The way i see it is if you cant talk to someone about it than you shouldnt be doing it with them.

Answer 4

u need to get a new bf