Saving yourself before marriage but what if your gay?

Question

i know that alot of straight people save them selfs before marriage but is it possilbe for a gay man or woman to save them selfs until they either can get married or be in a commited relationship?

Answer 1

Sure, why not. And alot of straight people lie, btw.

Answer 2

Absolutely! Marriage, after all, is just the ceremonial terminology. It isn't the actual piece of paper that legally binds you to another person in the government's eyes. And nobody is going to check and see if people getting married are in committed relationships- it's assumed (although the number of divorces makes me wonder)- but to me, you can 'save yourself for marriage' even if you never get that lil' piece of paper. Many gays and lesbians have commitment ceremonies that mirror straight weddings in exactly the same way, only they're not honored by the government.

So, to answer your question, yes, a gay person can save themselves, absolutely, until the point of being in a committed relationship that mirrors straight marriage. Many do, a lot don't, but the same goes for straight people!

Answer 3

Yeah, if anyone wants to save them selves for the person they really want they can. You dont have to be straight to want to save your "purity". That goes down to more of a personal moral of fooling around stupidly or waiting. Think about it this way, gay or straight, do you want your partner to have slept with 4, 5, 6, or more other people or have waited? I find a feeling of security would be in that no matter which way you swing. Interesting question, food for thought.

Answer 4

I am in a loving caring same sex marriage. regardless of what bigots think I love my wife.. So I don't see why you cant have a same sex marriage.

I am also not self hating or loathing or any form there of. I am a happy well adjusted American woman that happens to be a lesbian. It does not mean I happen to be as dumb as a rock like some bigots that answer questions on here and try to tell you you are wrong just because they don't have the nerve to come out.
It takes a strong person to stand up and say I am going to marry a person in my same gender and I am going to wait for the right one because I think God made me and he wants me to be happy.

So here's to you. Do what you want and be happy!

blessed be

Answer 5

Abstaining from sex until you're in a committed relationship has very little to do with your orientation, but more with your personal choice of sexual interactions.

Some people are able to experiement more freely without feeling any less of themselves. While others assign a more personal/intimate attitude to a sexual interaction. However, I don't think that your orientation has much to do with this phenomenon.

Answer 6

well of course it's possible; the question is why would you? being gay lends a certain predisposition to the disregard of oppressive sexual mores, or else a sever self-hatred. our only choice is to ignore conservative sexual standards that say we shouldn't be allowed to EVER have sex. realizing the ridiculousness of that standard, why would we consider other repressive standards to make sense?

i've always looked at the issue of premarital sex this way: marriage (or any gay equivalent) is a huge commitment and a big investment. it's a bit like buying an expensive car. would you buy such a car without ever taking it for a test drive? i don't think so...

my analogy oversimplifies the issue, but sexual compatibility is a huge concern for a long term relationship. i think if people were more careful about marrying or partnering with a person whose sexual needs matched their own, we'd have a LOT fewer divorces.

Answer 7

If you want to wait then wait, but PLEASE tell the other person because I hardly even see straight people who wait to have sex. For me, I want to make sure I'm sexually compatible with the other person so I know I can't wait. I've also seen straight marriages that end because they wanted to get married before they have sex. Needless to say, they are divorsed now. Its your choice, I hope you find someone who respects that.

Answer 8

I've known a couple of gay Christians who have tried it. Even if you can't legally marry, you can have a commitment ceremony in America, so I suppose one can wait for that. But I wouldn't have waited with a woman or a man.

Answer 9

Yes, it happens. Most gay people I know have already tried forcing themselves to live a heterosexual or a bisexual life, but sometimes you will meet "gold-star gays/lesbians." Those are the ones (like myself) who have never been touched by the opposite sex. I'm a "gold-star lesbian" who saved herself for her WIFE. My wife did not save herself for marriage, but that didn't matter to me. We have never been happier with anyone else, we are crazy in love and our sex life can't be beat.

Answer 10

It's questions like this that make it harder for gay men and women to obtain equal rights. You're asking if it's okay to shirk abstinence because children aren't in the equation.

Abstinence is half practical, half committal. It is meant to both reduce unwanted pregnancy, and strengthen the bond that lovemaking creates.

Ask yourself this: If you think straight couples should wait for marriage/long-term committment, then you have your answer. Gay couples are no different than any other.

Answer 11

I think you can. I know I have. But Im more interested in just meeting the right person right now and develop a relationship with him and talk about it. I hope my answer was ok. Goodluck.