Right well , i've known my best mate for 12 years and we really get on well. last year we both got drunk and we kissed, and have done 4 times since then, but its always when we are drunk, and we have never spoke about it.Ive started really liking her, well actually alot she is always on my mind.she has started seeing this guy(not going out with) and im really jelouse. basically i don;t know what to do should i tell her or not. do u think this could reck our relationship? im really having troble making up my mind ... i know im the only one who can deside what to do... but any advice would be great. if anyone has been in the same situation how did it work out? and thanks
2007-01-30 14:44:57 · 14 answers · asked by samatha s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I reckon you should go for it before it is too late and you loose her to this other guy and if that does happen it is going to be really really hard because then there will be 3 people involved instead of just the both of yous. If you be honest with her and tell her how you feel you never know what the end result will be. Maybe she is waiting for you to make the move because she is too shy or might think that you are not interested in her that way!! You will feel alot better once you tell her and if you's are both meant to be with eachother then it will turn out good in the end but if it doesn't at least you still have a close friendship with her!!
2007-01-30 14:51:08 · answer #1 · answered by pqr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello Sweetie,
This must be a rough one for you. I have had the same experience in my lifetime. We end up messing around with our best girl friends and sometimes feelings happen even when alcohol induced. I asked myself if I told her of my feelings am I going to lose her friendship all together or should I sit back and watch her date all these loser men. None of them have yet to see her value. I kept my mouth shut about my feelings and played it safe. We had a lil spat I think because we let things go really far one night with each other and this made things weird the next day, here I was thinking about okay what does this mean after what happen last night...as she talked to her bf on the phone and kinda crushed my heart. Anyways we didn't talk for 6 months or so but then began communicating again and our friendship is back to normal. Except now I have a bf and I don't have girl sleep overs any longer( plus my moving didn't help much either LOL) So my best answer could be how much do you love her and how much would it hurt if you didn't even have a friendship to share with this beautiful woman? Playing it safe is what I think!
Best of Luck Sweetie!
XOXO,
BQ
2007-01-30 16:17:26 · answer #2 · answered by Just me! 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You gotta ask your self the question are you attracted to women? If you are you probably feel the way you do about your best friend because your so close! Get your self out on the gay scene, just use google to find some places. Tell your friend what your doing, you will soon find out if she feels the same especially if she wants to come with you and if she recoils in horror at least your friendship will stay in tact cause you won't have embarrassed her by declaring your undying love. This is a win win situation cause if you don't get together with her at least you will meet new friends Good Luck, let me know what happens.
2007-02-02 09:24:14 · answer #3 · answered by jane h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're preaching to the choir here brother. My best advice is be honest with her. I'm actually in the same situation right now, so I know how hard it is. I'd try to get her before she gets serious with this guy.
In the case of my best friend. She's got serious trauma-induced intimacy issues, and I seem to be the only person on the planet who she actually trusts. I'm terrified she'll shut me out like she does everyone else out of fear of being made a victim again.
We all got problems. I say go for it.
2007-01-30 14:56:40 · answer #4 · answered by Gary W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Weigh the pros & cons - if she doesn't feel the same way you do, you could hurt the friendship, but if she does then all is well. Which is harder? Losing the friendship or never taking the chance on love? If your friendship is that strong after 12 years, you should be able to talk about anything. Good luck. ;)
2007-01-30 14:52:22 · answer #5 · answered by seamless1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you only kiss when you two have been drinking I can assure it was the courage juice talking and not her feelings..If she was attracted to you she would have said something long before now.. You may want to hold off on the liquor before you do something that will put you in a very awkward position with her.It appears she sees you as a very good friend, you may want to keep it @ that and move on before you get your heart ripped out and stepped on...Sorry
2007-01-30 14:51:38 · answer #6 · answered by gee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,I've been in this situation before.I know him when I was 8 years old and when I am in Standard 5,I was in love with him.I just kept my feeling to him until Standard 6,he knew I like him.He was being shy to me,don't want to talk to me when we were in Form 1.Until now I'm Form 2,I still like him.I think you should tell her that you like her,maybe she will understand and want to go out with you again.
2007-01-30 16:10:46 · answer #7 · answered by creamy10 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
pal, this might help but its my personal preference.. I would rather have a nice friend than a wrecked relationship.. My analysis says that spouses and friends expect quite different things from each other.
Bottom line - I would think n times before marrying my best friend.
2007-01-30 14:49:57 · answer #8 · answered by masku darling 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude, hurry up n tell her b4 that guy gets in ur way! i've seen this in movies...i think u'll do pretty good cuz u've known her 4 almost ever and have feelings that are stronger. Maybe she feel the same way. u nevr know.....
2007-01-30 14:54:27 · answer #9 · answered by Gweeboo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Avoid like the plague,
Don't get involved
2007-01-30 17:08:47 · answer #10 · answered by Elle J Morgan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋