Last night my wife confessed to me that she is very bicurious. I want to support her, but not sure how to support her. It doesn't bother me if she wants to try it. Is that a bad thing? I'm just glad she felt comfortable enough with me to share her fantasy.
2007-01-30 13:12:45 · 29 answers · asked by getlean_07 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ask her if you can watch and or join in...Now that's supportive.
2007-01-30 13:16:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Obviously you must have a good marriage for your wife to feel she can trust you with these private and controversial thoughts. I would definitely open the communication further with her by being honest with her as to your first response and then taking the steps between the two of you to explore just what this means to you both. Many couples spice their sexual experiences by adding fantasy play but each of you must understand it's fantasy and or are turned on by the particular fantasy. Often we think about a lot of things more from being curious than wanting to pursue the activity but more discussion about the subject if you are having thoughts or reactions privately about this that you have not share with your wife. Now you must trust her back and share your honest thoughts on the subject without making it into a mountain or more serious than it really is. Good Luck.
2016-03-28 21:38:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, there are millions of woman who have wondered or are bi-curious. This is not an unusual thing. However, most do not act out on it. It is a fantasy only and they live their entire lives and never try it. So, I would listen to what she has to say but not incourace or influence her in any way. It is great that she felt comfortable to share that with you...most wont or dont. That tells me you have a strong relationship and nothing to worry about. Lastly, no it isnt a bad thing...its just a fantasy...we all have them...most of us wont admit them.
2007-01-30 13:18:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First, being transgendered, I don't have a problem with people who are gay, bi, bi curious, or any other gender or sexual or gender prediliction.
That said, I do consider marriage a commitment. I tend to consider "open marriages" a prolonged period of dating. If you wish to be with multiple partners, I would consider doing so prior to marriage.
If your wife has confessed being curious about other sorts of relationships, I'm wondering if she might have had such fantasies prior to marriage, and if it might have been a better idea to explore them then.
If she is committed to you now, why the need to explore? If you are curious about a relationship with a man, or with another woman, isn't that really the same thing? (Gee, I never had sex with so-and-so, what might that be like?)
Starting to explore other sorts of sexual relationships after marriage seems to weaken marriage. It opens up the relationship to danger that wouldn't exist if you hadn't simply gone there.
Explore before marriage. Once you make a commitment to a particular person though, once you've made certain vows (unless you've done so for purely economic reasons) I think such vows are worth sticking to.
My opinion only, and I certainly don't expect that my views ought to be imposed on everybody.
2007-01-30 13:24:39 · answer #4 · answered by Deirdre H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be possible that your wife may have had these fantasies way before you two even got married. You may want to ask her this question on why she feels like this towards the other sex when she can fantasize with you.
I would not support her with that kind of behavior and you may want to find out if she is going through some type of depression due to her childhood past.
2007-01-30 13:19:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its great that she told you about this....however I have a different take on this than most. Suppose she tries this....and finds that she enjoys being with another women more than being with you...will you be okay with that? What if she tells you that she would also like to try having sex with the guy down the road.... or she would REALLY like to see YOU with another Man....you be okay with that as well? Guess what I am trying to say is be very careful what you BOTH agree to try.....sometimes a fantasy should be left just as that....a fantasy.
Best of luck
2007-01-30 13:30:37 · answer #6 · answered by oldman 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This may very well just stay in a fantasy stage too. You can encourage her to explore but you should not pressure her into doing anything that will make either of you uncomfortable. Trouble with introducing a third party into a relationship is sometimes one or other of the initial couple is hurt. Be careful to tread cautiously.
2007-01-30 13:29:56 · answer #7 · answered by Deirdre O 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you love her no matter what. ask her if she would want a three-some with you included. also ask if she is still in love with you. if she says yes, honestly would you believe her? do you think if she tried it and liked sex better with women that she could leave you? that is something you should think about, it could happen. you didnt specify how long you have been together and if you have kids or not. if I knew more I could tell you excatly what I feel about the situation. My moms cousin was a beautiful young woman that married a attractive, wealthy guy. the guy later turned out to be gay. this girl wad devistated, had a divorce and later developed an eating disorder. anything could happen. listen to every word your wife says and watch her closely.
good luck!
2007-01-30 13:23:49 · answer #8 · answered by danielle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, so what? It's your choice if you want an open marriage, but just because she has bisexual fantasies or is bisexual doesn't mean that she can't be monogamous. But like I said, if you're cool with an open marriage or with your wife having an extramarital partner, that's your business.
2007-01-30 13:17:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's not a bad thing that you are not bothered by her fantasies. you should be glad she feels comfortable enough to tell you about it. if you don't have any problems then that's great, let her go for it.
2007-01-30 13:18:59 · answer #10 · answered by S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why you think its a bad thing? If she lets you join in or watch, many men would so think your a lucky man. Try and if you don't like it then tell her, ain't nothing wrong being open to new things, it better this way, then for her to go out and do it without you knowing!!!
2007-01-30 13:19:17 · answer #11 · answered by smileygirl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋