At what age did you move out? Were you scared to move out, what did you face while you were on your own or living with someone else?
I want to move in with my boyfriend who is 21 im 17. My parents are very stirct about school and my relationships. I think my parents would disaprove of me moving in with him at that age, and im planning to go to college. They don't know about us yet. Im waiting till I graduate highschool and then try. But im scared of them saying 'no you cant' they are paying for my college, what should I do then? any suggestions? and please anwer the question ^
2007-01-30 11:41:35 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
No no... I dont want to live with him at 17. I want start living with him when i graduate highschool I'll be 19 by then!
2007-01-30 11:50:17 · update #1
I say listen to your parents ... there's a reason why you don't move in that young with a boyfriend ... you'll have a lot of work to do - studying - school projects ... etc ... and he might be a distraction ... the possibility of you getting pregnant will sky rocket .. and he might have more of an influence on you than you think ... I would stay with my parents - bring your boyfriend around and make him part of the family ... show them why you love him so much and maybe by the time high school is over with they'll be more accepting of him ... if they give you the ultimatum - pay for school if you live at home or not pay if you move out - I'd stay and work things out - get your education - and move out in the next two years or so ... save some money and there ya go ... !
I moved out when I was 17 - but I was heading to Basic Training for the Army ... that's a whole different subject .. lol .. so I won't go into my situation and what I faced while I was on my own ... good luck ... with whatever you choose ...
2007-01-30 11:54:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was 17, but I was in an unhealthy environment I felt I needed to get out of and I didn't get any financial help.
If they are paying for your college, my advice is not to do anything to screw it up. That's a lot of money you're talking about.
Basically, you will get I'm guessing about $20,000 or more to keep your folks happy for a few more years.
Why do you feel such a strong need to move in with this boyfriend? You didn't state any good reason for wanting to move in with him and you can spend a lot of time with him without shacking up together. Then you will be responsible for bills. Your b/f may expect you to do the cleaning and the cooking and the laundry too. You don't need that the year before you start college. You will have enough financial responsibities the way it is. College is a big responsibility. You are preparing to shape yourself for the rest of your life. I would take it seriously, put as much effort into it as possible, and not make your life any more complicated than it has to be right now.
2007-01-30 11:58:23 · answer #2 · answered by sorcergeek 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not move in with him until you finish college. If you do, it will make graduating from college much more difficult. I am not saying that you cannot spend lots of time with him. But chances are the two of you will not be together long enough, so don't ruin college and your ability to make a living over a high school sweetheart. Instead, remember, you have the ability to go to college. Most people do not have that luxury. You are about to meet guys that are light years beyond the looser 21 year old that would date a 17 year old...aka your boy friend. So please do not ruin your future by moving in with him.
2007-01-30 11:51:45 · answer #3 · answered by gibson_slayer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are paying for college, then you will have to abide by their rules as long as you depend on them for that. It's not about them being mean. You simply owe them that respect. If you want to move in with your boyfriend, be prepared to get a job and work for what you want -- including college tuition.
I moved out at age 19 to be with the woman I love. Upset my parents, hurt a few feelings, but I'm in college and working and living with the most beautiful woman in the world. I don't regret a thing.
2007-01-30 11:48:09 · answer #4 · answered by Aiden 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i does not say there is an appropriate age to circulate out yet there actually is an age shrink to which staying in may be seen "failure to launch". i might say as long as a guy or woman can chop up in the past they're 30 years previous, it incredibly is suitable. everywhere from age 18 to 20-5 is ultimate. something at or after 30 years previous may be getting previous due and the completed "mom's basement" deal might initiate LOL. yet incredibly than focusing in this adverse ingredient, I concentration greater on the beneficial end of issues like, "Does the guy be conscious of what they're doing or is their condition controlling them?" "Does the guy have a occupation and a hopeful outlook?" i think of if somebody incredibly is conscious what they're doing and shifting out previous due is a factor of the plan and the super image, despite if the guy is previous 30, i think of they nonetheless deserve credit. it incredibly is while there is not any plan, no vast image, no hopeful outlook that a guy or woman might have did not launch.
2016-10-16 08:07:36 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're caught in the transition from being a child to being an adult. It's a very tough time. I was 17 when I left (for college), but was still forced into obedience (to strict, religious parents) because of financial dependance. I went to a church college at their "request".
Being an adult consists of two things; the freedom to do as you choose, and the responsibility of sustaining yourself in those choices. If you do not have the strength to sustain yourself; to stand on your own two feet financially and emotionally, then you are still dependent, and not yet an adult. (sorry...)
As an adult you are responsible for making your own moral choices and accepting the consequences that flow from them. You're not capable of doing that yet. Until you are, making this kind of choice is fraught with peril.
I was very strong-willed. I got married at 18, against my parent's wishes, but with their grudging acceptance. It was the worst mistake of my life. 18 years later, it cost me my marriage, my children, my career, my wealth and nearly my life. Bright as I was, certain as I was, at 18 I was not capable of forseeing the lasting consequences of that choice.
If my opinion matters, the choice you want to make here is a life choice. It will have far-reaching consequences you cannot possibly see yet. It is not a "wrong" choice. It is an insane one. To imagine you are capable of sustaining a mature, stable relationship while 17 and still in high school is... trust me... totally irrational. And with the guy only 21, and encouraging this thought... You both lack the maturity for this to result in anything less than pain. Do this, and you are going to hurt for a very, very long time.
2007-01-30 11:56:45 · answer #6 · answered by antirion 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hmmm, are y0u really sure you want to move in... Think objectively.. your're still a minor and not financially dependent.. Think of all the problem that might arise.. what if your bf lost his job? I know you guys love each other so much that you guys are willing to sacrifice for each other... But!! Get real.. are you seriously wanna ask you parents for money if your bf lost his job? and how well do you know that guy? You will never really know a guy until you live with him... Just think carefully, I'm not against your move but it sounds quiet irrational.. My suggestion is wait until your bf has a stable job and you can prove to your parents that you're independent and don't to depend on others...
By then, they will know their baby girl has grown up and ready to face the world alone.. huhu
2007-01-30 11:55:18 · answer #7 · answered by Tsarey 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was 17 too, but i didn't move out to move in with a girl. I went in the Army. You have lots of time to be living with a guy after you are of age... In many states...if you move in at 17...he will go to prison for having sex with a minor, if your mom or dad want to pursue it. Unless of course you are emancipated.
2007-01-30 11:46:38 · answer #8 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was 16 when i moved in with my boyfriend who was 22. when i turned 18 we got married. he was very controlling. he started beating me shortly after we got married and cheated on me with 14 year old girls. he got me pregnant and made me get an abortion and now i cant have children. a guy who is 21 should be dating girls his own age. if he is dating younger girls now he will always want younger girls. i hate that i missed out on being a teenager. i learned alot about life moving out so early, but i never got to be a regular teenage girl. i didnt get to go to prom or graduation. think about it. enjoy being a teenager. i am 29 years old now. go to college. let mom and dad pay. and just think of all the other people you will meet in college. you will have so much fun. enjoy it while it lasts cuz adult life headaches definitely outweight the freedom of living on your own.
2007-01-30 11:52:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it really depends on how important college is to you? If I were 17/18, I certainly would not move in with my boyfriend. Why??? You have an entire life ahead of yourself and trust me, living with him would be a distraction.
In all honesty, if we were footing the bill for college/university for our kids and they moved in with their boyfriend/girlfriend, our funding would stop.
Take advantage of this opportunity. It is a short four years of your life. AFTER college you guys can move in together.
mb
2007-01-30 11:49:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋