Indian Arranged Marriage - Need advice?

Question

I am an Indian guy, 29 years old and my parents have arranged marriage with one of the close family relative girl. She is 10 years younger than me.

What would be the advantages/ dis-advantages by marrying a Close Blood relative and a 10 year younger girl?

Answer 1

As per the given data, she is 19. Girls at that age has a lot of dreams, so if you have a good financial backup... its good. There are a lot of other factors responsible for more acurate advantages/disadvantages... like her education, her family background etc. This is because she hasn't "really" seen the world it seems... but if she has seen the college... you know what I mean. If her family is say poor... then she is looking for you to fulfill her dreams (Money, mahal & mercedes).

As it is an arranged marriage, you must not be cursed if she does any foul plays on your parents to create a nuclear family. So, to avoid it, you have to control all the activities of your wife.. if you want to live with your parents after marriage.

So, if you are a traditional guy & love your parents.. follow what they say & do think about it your own before you actually commit (in case they give any wrong suggestions).

Answer 2

To you he looks like a chimpanzee??? Have you ever seen a chimp?? You are f'king crazy or who ever arrange your marriage is evil. My guess is that it is you. I doubt very much he looks anything like a chimp. I imagine your mental problems have more to do with your fears than his looks. First of all. ALL people have about the SAME number of hair folicles per square inch of skin. The genetic differences are mostly due to how large the hair is in diameter and how long it grows before it falls out. You have as many hairs on your face ...or chest...or back..or butt as he does. Chances are yours are much finer and much shorter. So, he is hirsuite. And your reaction is that his hair is ugly. Well, that is just stupid. I know, it is what it is, but it is just a totally irrational response to human variability. There are a couple of things you could do: Get some counseling. Your marriage is in trouble. Ask him to wax or shave. You could help. Touch him. I'll bet his hair feels good. If you're willing to give him a chance. But it sounds that for some reason (and I doubt it is the hair) that you have decided not to actually commit to the marriage. Nothing we can do about that. Either try to fix it, or end it.

Answer 3

How close of a relation are you talking about? If she is, for example, a first cousin, you could be in for problems if you have children. Talk to your doctor and find out more about inherited genetic disorders and what your risk factors are in regards to passing them to your children. Even if there are no inherited illnesses that you know of in your family, if both carry a recessive gene, you could end up with a child who has health problems. That is definitely worth checking into and also discussing with your parents.

As far as the age difference, it's hard to tell how that will affect your relationship. You might find that you just don't have anything in comon---that you don't share the same taste in music, friends, etc. Most of that is superficial and will change over time. Couples tend to either grow together or grow apart over time and most of that is a result of the choices they make during the time they are married.

I know that I am from a different culture than you are and that the values I have grown up with are much different than what traditional Indian values are, so I don't know how much of my advice is applicable in your situation. However, I would strongly suggest having the medical aspect looked into, just to be on the safe side.

Answer 4

Hey buddy spare the poor gal. u r 10 yrs her senior? want to act as her uncle?
let me be a bit frank buddy. after say another 10 yrs u will start losing interest in her physically and she would be still in her prime (29 yrs i assume at that time) and she would like to have physical relations till much longer. What will be ur plight at that time? So marrying a much younger girl is more of a disaster for her even though u might feel proud to have a young wife even when ur a middle aged fellow. Think of her.
Have u heard the saying that means that the marriage of old age is more useful for the neighbours? so do u wish ur wife to be frustrated 10 years down the line?
As far as arranged marriage is concerned, it is no big advantage or disadvantage. Ultimately if one likes the looks of the wife, the guy tends to fall in love ultimately and indian females are sort of programmed to fall in love with the husband in any case. so do think in terms of arranged or love marriage, think in terms of mental as well as physical compatibility.
Good luck to you

Answer 5

How close is close? 1st or 2nd cousin? There are low percentage of their offspring will have genetic defect such as hemophilia, but otherwise it should be ok, I'm 10 years younger than my husband, I always look up to him for advices and I adore him.

Answer 6

Well, if its arranged and you can't get out of it, then go for it and make the best of a younger girl,,!!!!! Hope she hot at least???

Answer 7

How close of a relative? I mean, one advantage will be that you will have LOTS in common if this is your little sister!

Answer 8

first of all how close is close and I understand that is your culture but you are an adult, do what you want.

Answer 9

Deformed children,and i don't see anything good coming out of it...

Answer 10

Besides you would be unhappy.. you'll be confussed. So.. if i were you; I wouldn't marry