he admits to cheating?

Question

i found pictures in his phone and he admitted to cheating and he just called me telling me that he has ended it with the other woman. should i forgive him?

Answer 1

Same thing happened, he said he ended it and less than a week later he was sleeping with her. We are together now after a divorce but i still have it in the back of my mind. Im not telling you to give up just to be careful and take care of yourself first.

Answer 2

before u forgive him, know that forgiveness takes time, certain things need to happen before u can forgive, such as he has to be willing to admit what he did caused u pain, he has to be remorseful, and show it. he has to do more than say he has ended it. u will have to see it in his actions. words and promises mean nothing without action. forgiveness doesn't happen overnight, it's a process just like everything else. he only admitted it because u found the evidence, and not because he felt guilt or that it was wrong. personally it would be so hard to forgive it, not because u didn't love the person but because u could never be sure when or if it was going to happen again. it's really hard to be able to go back into a relationship that has been compromised by betrayal unless he is really remorseful and willing to stop what he is doing.

Answer 3

I'm sure the "once a cheater" crowd who are intolerant of others foibles believe that leaving is the answer.

You on the other hand are dealing with your own reality.

Right now you are hurting. The damage is done. The hurt does not change if you chase him out, in fact it can be worse.
SO, you can take him back but make sure to put some limits.
Make him tell you why it happened so you can both recognise the symptoms.
He is truly remorseful for hurting you and will NEVER do it again.
He agrees to the divorce withouty anything but his clothes if it ever happens again.
If that happens he can have ONE second chance.

At least that way you can get some payback for your pain. The pain happens either way, why not get some payback. If you toss him out you are hurt and lost and he moves on. Why do that.
Be adult and work through it.

Answer 4

well you had to find the pictures before he admitted it what do you think about that ? do you ever ask yourself if you never found the pictures would the cheating still be going on? He called you to tell you that the affair was over why did he not do this is person ? No I could not forgive that if he was a decent person he would have done so in person. forget him move on ..good luck .

Answer 5

Definitely. I know it seems hard to do now...
My boyfrined admitted to cheating, and i was absolutely heart broken!!! But there's no point in holding grudges, it just makes you more aggressive and angry. You'll feel a lot better within yourself if you forgive.
I know you probably wont forget, but you'll be a better person at the end of the day if you forgive him.
Always remember to never turn anybody away when they apologise, no matter what they've done.
Move on without him, and you'll soon see things will work out...
Best of luck to you!

Answer 6

That's a tough one. They say once a cheater always a cheater. Well I've already seen that one proven wrong. Myself personally I would have a hard time with the whole fogiving. I wouldn't take him back no matter what. I've been burned before BUT it also depends on how much you think you can trust him now. If you can't get over it then don't drag it on. If you think you'll be able to trust him not to do it again and be able to move forward then yes. It's really a hard call and you'll get alot of NO's I can be sure but it's up to you. Follow your head not your heart. Good luck.

Answer 7

You are shacked up guy and don't spend Christmas together (are you using him for cheap rent?) Since he is not your husband and there doesn't appear to be any children involved. I suggest you move out of his house and dump him. There must be some trust issues with him since you were browsing through his phone for pictures. I would never want to be with a guy that uses a girl for sex and in a heartbeat can dump her, which is what he has done to this girl he was cheating with. Ask yourself this..can you really forgive him and trust him again? I doubt it.

Answer 8

That depends on you. Do you think you can get past this? Will he understand you have trust issues with him for a very long time? Will you be able to deal with the hurt, anger, and betrayal? This is hard to put behind you and without counselling is very seldom achieved. If he did it once he's more likely to do it again. If you can answer yes to these questions then I guess you forgive him and go on. I wouldn't, but, you're not me. Good luck.

Answer 9

That is a question only you can answer. Do you hold grudges? Can you get the picture out of your mind. Him admitting it is a big step. But, if you are going to hold it over his head, then just end it. You and he will be much happier.

Answer 10

Why ask us?we don't know who he is and apparently you don't know him either.I know it would be impossible for me to stay with my man after he betrayed me because he wouldn't even look the same to me .I would be thinking just who is this stranger in my house??He turns out to be a liar and a cheat.Is this what I thought he was when we hooked up???no.Will I forever be looking over my shoulder for other signs of cheating???yes.Then what's the point??What you thought the two of you had you now know was a false image and who wants to play those games.Your husband or b/f has cheated and lied and will continue to do what ever you foolishly allow him to do .Break it off,get away from the situation as fast as you can for you will never feel the same comfort with him again.It's his loss not yours,there are men out here who have good characters and respect their relationships and if you don't find one then so be it,never put up with crap for companionship,you are better company for yourself.