I cheat on my husband and I feel terrible!!What should i do??

Question

It was a big mistake..and really regreet what happened...I was drunk (i wouldnt do it if i would be sober..NEVER) this is our second year of marriage and I dont know if I should say the true, i dont want to loose him,he is the best thing in my life and i really love him,but this is in my head all the time

Answer 1

You'll do it again only next time you'll more than likely be sober. A majority of people who cheat in marriage and relationships use this same excuse (i was drunk) or (the booze made me do it), 2 very lame excuses.

The fact remains it's a character flaw that all of us have, anyone could cheat in a relationship. What prevents people from doing it is simply having control of ourselves mentally.

Until you realize you have flaw's in your character, and learn how to control/correct those flaw's you'll continue to do these type of things. Regardless of how many times you tell yourself you will Never do it again, if you don't fix the root cause, this behavior will continue.

Hope this helps you understand and deal with this issue.

Answer 2

I think you should think about it real hard about telling him what happen with this other man. Because he probably won't forgive you. And you need to except the fact that he probably want to get a divorce. But I think you should tell him because he probably will forgive you. And you don't want him to hear it out on the street instead of from the person he loves. And if you can't get this out of your mind it is best to tell him so you can get this load off your chest.And when he decide to be with his wife try to spend the rest of your life letting him know that you made a mistake and you love him. Good luck in any thing you decide to do.

Answer 3

You are not worthy to be married. Divorce your husband and stay single. Once a cheat, always a cheat and being drunk is NO excuse - you wanted to do it and found a simple solution, get so plastered that you could blame it on the booze. How sad and pathetic. Your husband deserves so much better.

Answer 4

If I were him, I wouldn't want to know, especially you're a young couple. Try loving him doubly as much as usual. He'll probably understand you made a mistake, something you need his forgiving for. He'll understand you're very sorry and didn't mean to hurt him. If he loves you, which I'm sure he does if he married you, time will heal the wounds. No need to throw it at his face. There'll be other mistakes, on his part too. When they happen and you're the one hurt, remember you haven't been perfect either but you're still together after all this time. Really, you made a mistake but you were drunk: it's not like you meant to upset him and ruin your marriage. Keep on loving him and drink a little less in the future...
PS: Once again, all this is if I were in his shoes.

Answer 5

I think you should tell him and let him decide if he wants to forgive you or leave you. You cheated on him, it is a big mistake, not telling him is is a bigger mistake. Coz if you dont tell him psychologically you will not feel comfortable and at the same time it is possible that you will forgive yourself for what you have done. while, simply that is NOT your right to forgive yourself, it is that of your husband. And one more thing, never drink without your husband... Seriously!

Answer 6

You have got to be kidding me. I have been with my wife for 13 yrs, married for 2. She got drunk at a friends thirtieth and slept with her best friends brother. She says she does not remeber much and has told me everything she can. He came and faced me (with his mother thretening to call the Police if i touched him- need a clean record for my job as all my friends know) and he says he cannot remember either. He was known to take care of the girls when they went out and has already been to hospital once as he tried to take his own life 2 days after it happened. I got this from one of my best mates who i trust completely. He tried pills. My wife has even checked with people who were at party to get more info but people either didnt see or dont want to be involved (who can blame them) . She is remorseful and i believe she regrets it more than anything and i am trying to work with her and councellors to fix what she broke. She has seen a councellor herself and to this day canot tell me WHY. This is my biggest issue. WHY?? If we dont know what caused ity how can we fix it/stop it from happening again.

All this. And you say I have cheated as well. That is a purely sexist comment to make. And as 40% of men and 30% of women cheat its not that much of a gap. You may have been hurt in the past. Too which i can sympathise but to tarnish us honest men with the same brush it just a terrible thing to say. How would you feel if someone said she wanted it. All women love it. Not a fair comment to make. And to think i came to thses threads because there is too much woman bashing in male ones saying to get rid of the slut.

Think first

Not all men are arseholes.

Answer 7

if u can feel the guilt, than u know right from wrong, sometimes we have to forgive ourselves, and ask god to forgive us and just go on in life, but i don't think it would be too wise to tell your husband about it, once u do he may never trust u again, and it will change your marriage forever. if u love him u will think twice about what u did and not allow it to happen again. we can blame things on being drunk, we can always find a reason, but life is all about our choices, and we can't lay the blame on anything but ourselves. troubles come from being out of the will of god.

Answer 8

Seriously.....the first thing I would do is fall to my knees and ask for forgiveness from God. Ask for guidance and go from there. Although married couples should typically be honest with each other....somethings are better left unsaid. And by the way....don't drink WITHOUT your man EVER AGAIN!

Answer 9

Just so you know, you allow nothing when drunk that you have not thought about sober.

If you love your husband and want to stay married, keep your mouth shut. This is your guilt for being cheat. Deal with it.

Maybe now you know why you do not cross that line.

Grow Up.

Answer 10

Hey, you messed up! Bad news is you won't forget it the rest of your life. I was somewhat seduced by a vindictive women my wife works with. They don't get along at all.

Yes, I was drinking and the woman is really hot.

Just out of expeience, over time the mistake will soften but it will still be there.

My sister-in-law did the same thing at a bar but she let it continue over a period of a few months, she's divorced now.

Consider it a learning, keep it to yourself and try to best with what you got for the rest of your life.