any good tips for controlling your temper?

Question

I have such a bad temper and it has got me into alot of trouble at times.At times I argue with my mum and i often lose my temper cos she has seriosuly let me down and I do hate her right now I really mean that.Anyway I don't want to sink to her level or anyone like that to be honest so how do you control your temper?Thanks x

Answer 1

First of all, shut your mouth. Just because you want to say something doesn't mean you should, so shut your mouth and actually think about what you're going to say before you say it. Then leave the room. Get yourself out of the situation where you can cool down.

And if you're a teenager, then you just need to get over yourself because all teens hate their parents at one time or another.

Answer 2

You've answered the question yourself-up to a point.
You say that losing your temper has got you into trouble on a number of occasions which says to me that there have been times when you've regretted losing it.
A major part of losing ones temper is saying/shouting/screaming things we later regret and often don't really mean.It's all heat of the moment stuff.
So Rule 1.Think first before opening your mouth.Ask yourself "Am I going to regret saying this?'
Rule2 Ask yourself "Do I really mean what I'm about to say?
Rule 3. Ask yourself if losing your temper is going to achieve the result you want when sitting down quietly and explaining your position in a rational manner might not achieve much more and in a quicker timescale.
Rule 4 Always remember the losing your temper escalates whatever the difference you have with the person you are rowing with.It is negative and in no way constructive.
Rule 5.Ask yourself.'What do I look like doing this"?
A responsible mature adult or some damn raving stupid adolescent that can't have their own way?
Rule 6 To make for a really good effect next time round to what lengths will losing my temper have to go?
In short STOP, Engage Brain and think is there a better way to explain my disappointment or difference of opinion?
You'll find that not just your Mum but the entire human race will be more likely to give you what you want if you're reasonable and treat them like you would wish to be treated yourself.GL

Answer 3

I had a awful childhood and grew into a very angry teenager and adult, so I know how you feel but anger is so negative and always gets a negative response, I have over the years learnt to not to react how everyone expected me to and still expect me to react now I use words and a calm tone even when I am steaming inside people are so shocked by it IE; your Mum, that I always win the battle, and cause I feel in me I have done good I am so pleased with myself that the anger goes away cause I am to busy been proud of myself, I know people laugh at it but I got some counselling it REALLY REALLY helped me, go to your doctor you can get it from him try my way you never know it may work for you it sure has for me good luck .

Answer 4

Instead of losing control and saying the hate word (or worse!) just walk away when you feel angry and take some time out of the situation.Go back when you have calmed down and can talk things through with out losing your temper.Hate is a very strong word (also, there's a fine line between love and hate!) don't tell your mum you hate her,coz no matter how many times you later tell her that you didn't mean it , she will always carry that thought with her and believe it.

Answer 5

use thought stopping when you feel like you are about to blow just count to ten in your mind maybe do some deep breathing if you still cant control your temper just go out for a walk and use that time to calm down
anyone can control there temper because if someone was picking on you and he was bigger than you and you know he would hurt you chances are you would keep your temper under control then

Answer 6

Do you live with your mum! If so maybe you should move out but you did'nt say how old you are.You don't say why you are so angry, is it something that is going on at work, or just you. Maybe you need anger managment classes. But if it is something outside of home, you have to deal with it. Did it occur to you mothers are only human too, it can't be that bad, try and forgive her, I'm sure you have done some stupid things in your like too, and she forgave you. I can only go on what you have wrote here, so try and be calm, and handle it, parents have their faults too.

Answer 7

Find some appropriate way to express your anger. Try leaving the situation thats making you angry until you can calm down and relax enough to talk about the problem that made you angry. Try going for a walk or get a punching bag to release you anger.

Answer 8

Let her do all the talkin... unless u have to. When u go to ur room breath and count to ten. and write down how u feel. (it helps me). And you dont hate her well... not for a long time anyway. Just remember to keep ur mouth shut and wait til it's the right moment to tell her how u feel cos she might not no.

Answer 9

Whenever you feel the temper level rising,start counting backward ie 10 --1.

Answer 10

Try anger management class,pray and ask God to take that spirit of anger from you,if your anger is the violent one,start counting from 20 backwards,take a pen and paper and start writing what is making you feel angry and tear it into pieces or finally walk out