Help Please!!!!!!!?

Question

I know this is normal to do but when i was a kid til i was almost 16, i did stuff with my younger cousin who is a girl and i feel so guilty. We did just about everything many times and i feel so guilty because i mean i was most likely her first kiss. Sometimes when i was younger, i think i used to get mad if she didn't want to do anything. My psychologist said all this was normal that people do this and don't admit it. but i feel guilty and i want the guilt to just go away! I feel gross and i will never do it again. I am 17 now. My first orgasm was most likely with her and that makes me feel gross!!!! HELP ME I FEEL SO DEPRESSED RIGHT NOW! Thanks so much if you reply and arn't rude!

I know someone said i shouldn't feel gross if i kept doing it but like my psychologist said, that was the person who was available. It's normal and i think i matured when i got older and stopped. I thought it was kinda gross but then i just stopped completely! I hope you understand what i mean. I don't know how to word it

I feel like i could have ruined her life even though we were both kids and she obviously liked it when we got older. It's just i read on here someone's cousin wanted her to do things with her and some people said what her cousin did was sexually harrass her so now i feel even worse!

Answer 1

don't know what to tell you, i kinda feel grossed out too! just don't do it ever again, same sex is one thing, same blood is something different. this very well could have damaged her, only time will tell, it may effect her ability to have a healthy relationship in the future. you need to make amends with her and apologize for such inappropriate things you did. she may need to hear it was wrong of you to take advantage of her. this may allow her to forgive and let you and move on. and you doing this will help you with the guilt you are feeling and help resolve the grossed out feeings you are having about yourself.

Answer 2

There is absolutely nothing to be gained from feeling guilt. It's just beating yourself up and accomplishing nothing else. Some people find it relieves the guilt to confess to the person, apologize to them and tell them how it makes you feel and that you'll never do it again. But don't tell her that if you can't keep that promise. Very often the apology is like lifting the weight that you're feeling and it can help the other person too. If she feels the need to say things to you, let her as it will also likely help both of you. She needs to know you really "hear" her feelings about it even if it's hard to listen to.

Remember you were a kid and when you knew better, you did better. Forgive yourself.

Answer 3

Kids experiment. How else do gays know they are homosexual?
The age at which this stops depends on the person.
But it's not as if it is your daughter or your sister. You must have had strong feelings for your cousin. Try remembering the positive things - the good times you had.
I fancied my cousin like crazy in my younger days. I grew out of it, but remember the good times we had. I also fancied my sister-in-law. These are normal feelings - things you cannot control. But I don't have a guilt feeling.

I think I would cut out the psychologist bit

Answer 4

I wouldn't feel so bad about it. My cousin was older and she did the same to me. She was my first kiss. I don't feel like I was sexually harrassed or assaulted. We are good friends today. We don't talk about the stuff that happened when we were younger. We both have our own families now and are happy well adjusted moms. So, don't feel so guilty...its how some of us learn.

Answer 5

hey girl,
Don't worry about it! What happened in the past stays in the past! Its normal to have these strange sexual feelings, I really hope you don't get too depressed!! I wouldn't want you to hurt your self in any way (I know I don't know you) but I had a fried once that would cut herself. It was extremely painful for me to see her go through that...and its so ironic, haha her name was Jessica and last name began with a T as well...right but back to you. Just forget about it! Talking about it usually always helps, so find someone you can trust and know very well and you know will help you, and confide everything in that person. Hope I helped

-goddess-

Answer 6

Just all part of growing up. My first sex was with my first cousin and we both now are happily married and think nothing of what happened years ago. You are not the first one nor will you be the last to be in that situation so just go on with your life before it destroys you.

Answer 7

I mean, sure, it might have been wrong to do, she was young and all, etc, but you know that. but in terms of helping you get away from the guilt, just remember that you were both young then and hopefully didn't know that it was wrong, and hopefully when you did realize it was wrong (if it even is wrong, no one definitely knows for sure) you stopped. if I were you, I'd talk to my cousin about how it affected her.

Answer 8

i know people who did this also. They are almost 24 and 22 and 20. They are cousins and sisters. They are all normal. They have lived normal lives.

Answer 9

you can never get on with your life if you dwell on the past.

Your concern is genuine. Maybe you should concider seeking closure from your cousin and let her know that everything will be ok.

Answer 10

Sounds to me like your obsessing over and you should stop being so narcissistic about it, and find a way to move on.