When I was growing up, a male friend and I had a competitive friendship. We were always trying to one up the other. After 6 years of friendship, I realized that I had grown to like him. My affections were mostly ignored until I asked him point blank if he liked me in that fashion. All he ever said was, "I don't know." I moved on, found someone I am truly happy with, and eventually got married. About a year ago, I met up with my old friend again. Naturally, we compared notes, and he seemed to be doing better in life than me (or so it seems to me). The woman he is with looks and acts very much like me. This left me feeling saddened for some reason---much like finding out the thing you value the most doesn't matter to anyone else.
I have dreams about him, sometimes involving him and my husband fighting. In my dreams I feel belittled but still attracted to him. Why do I feel this way? How can I make it stop? Should I tell my husband about this?
2007-01-29 13:41:11 · 7 answers · asked by Jenn 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was (and still am) very happy with my husband. All of this started when I ran into my "friend" again. My husband and I talk about everything. We were friends long before we got married, and we are slowly but surely making our dreams come true. I just want this "sour" feeling to go away.
2007-01-29 13:57:32 · update #1
The dreams will past. I told my husband about my dreams about an ex. But I feel I can share anything with him. He did not judge me for it. He knows about me and my past with my ex. He was not threatened at all because he is and will always be the best man for me.
2007-02-05 02:57:17 · answer #1 · answered by mimiamours 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people experience feelings like or similar to this. Very simply put "grass is always greener on the ..." you know the rest.
It is human nature to wonder about what could be. It is what drives us to try to do better. But if you let these feelings take control you will never be happy, for there is always a what if I hade, or maybe i should have ..... so my thoughts are accept it as a fantacy and leave it as such
2007-02-04 09:47:08 · answer #2 · answered by letsget_dangerous 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're fantasizing about your past. Are you not happy with your husband? If that's the case, you need to resolve those issues before any other considerations. It would NOT help telling your husband, but rather offend him. I dont mean to be harsh, but how do you think that would make him feel?
2007-01-29 13:49:11 · answer #3 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have the 'what ifs.' You have to keep yourself very busy. Tell yourself you'll think about him from, say 3:00 to 4:00. Soon, he won't occupy your thoughts as much. I would not tell hubby...men never understand these types of things.
I had a buddy like that too. His wife's name was the same as mine. They divorced...I'm divorced...I'm watching....NOT stalking! :)~
2007-01-29 14:01:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
count your blessings. you only know what he tells you. Living with someone is something eles. You dont know what goes on behind closed door.
Be flattered
2007-02-04 13:11:39 · answer #5 · answered by tennessee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trying to relive the past only makes you forget about the present and endangers your future
2007-01-29 13:56:52 · answer #6 · answered by zether 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
stop living in the past
2007-01-29 13:49:48 · answer #7 · answered by Answerfinder1360 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋