Have you ever...?

Question

do you ever feel like you just cant connect with people, you cant love or feel sympathy...i am this way...sometimes i dont even feel bad when someone is hurting...(its not always this way...i mean i do love people, but sometimes i dont...yea it doesnt make sense...) i just absolutly cant connect with anyone...not really anyways...it feels like that part of my soul got left out or something.

Answer 1

I think everyone asks this question at least once in his or her life, probably because we are all inherently selfish to a degree. This by itself is not dangerous or alarming. If you are able to say, "I don't always love people," you are not a sociopath. A sociopath wouldn't have that self-awareness. After all, does Lord Voldemort ever ask, "Gee, why can't I love anybody? Do I have bad character?" If it's only an occasional feeling, I wouldn't worry. It probably means that you are lonely from the lack of a support group, so your psyche responded by shutting down your emotions. It's an adaptive mechanism to ensure you won't go crazy from emotional isolation. If you don't feel cared for or understood by the people around you, of course you won't feel sympathetic to their pain. Find a group of people in your school or town, one that shares a common interest with you. And there, you may meet others with a similar personality. Also, you've probably already heard this, but having a therapist to talk to might help you to understand your feelings and change them if you wish. Good luck!

Answer 2

You must have had a rough life to be so jaded, or else you are pretty spoiled. Either way I feel sorry for you. Maybe you were very sheltered. You have to be able to identify with and connect with people to empathize with them. Where you maybe hurt by someone you tried to help, or burned by someone you offered aid and comfort to? That might be the problem. If you want to talk more about this you can e-mail me. Maybe it will help you figure out what the problem is. Some people just don't care, but I get the feeling this bothers you.

Answer 3

The 'not really' I noticed, caught my attention. Nothing 'really' abnormal there, simply human Judgment as usual. The Judgment is negative, the Will is positive. The fact is you can not 'connect' with people in connection with you. You no more know the reality of their feeling anymore than they may know yours; emotion is not a sightable observable irrefutable something; there is always possibility of fraudulent mimicking of emotional expression. Either you can not connect with yourself or you are correct in your assumption that you have nothing to value 'connection' with. What is this 'connection'; people don't 'connect' at the spirit. We humans are a complex rapacious confluence of spirit, mind and body and they all sense, no part distinct from the other as waters merging with other waters, they can not be individually identified. "I" can not be distinguished from "feel" anymore than 'heart' can be discerned from its beat. The Judgment is negative, the Will is positive.

Answer 4

Try taking a philosophy or psychology course, try therapy. It seems you need to look at yourself and really love yourself then i'm sure you will be able to project love to others. You may find people you connect to via the internet in maybe interest groups, chat rooms etc that may share commen interests with you. Meditation/yoga/thi chi can help you love from within. Take it easy and look outside inside and around you will find your own answers if you look deep enough.

Answer 5

I think i understand what your saying.

Sometimes (and this is human nature) we get really preoccupied with something other than the task at hand. This is usually because of something that is troubling us, and we don't even know it.

This is often because our subconscious is sensing "danger". Now when i say danger i mean raised stress levels, tension, etc. And your mind is trying to block it out in order to keep us from "going over the edge."

This is usually the case when we ourselves are stressed out. I hope this helps!

Answer 6

I've been there. So, yes. When you don't connect, when you can't feel for others; it's because you're hurting. It's not about other people. It's about you. I believe in self-therapy. Figure out what is making you unhappy. Write it out in a journal. Express yourself. Try meditation. It works!

Answer 7

Yes, I do all the time. I don't want to hurt anybody, but I don't feel connected either.

It's disturbing, but I've resigned myself to the fact that I just don't "feel." How do you make yourself "feel"? The only way I have been able to deal with it is to isolate myself.

By the way, AJ is wrong. Getting yourself into sexual situations will only make things worse for you and likely hurt your partners.

Answer 8

I feel like this at certain times, but that is until I am faced with a situation where someone I care about is hurting.

Answer 9

it is okay to be like that... I deeply love and care about the people that are closest to me likes friends and family, even though most of the time I don't show exuberance or thankfulness.

Answer 10

Well either your seriously depressed and should probably see a therapist or. . .You're a sociopath. You seem nice so I doubt you're a sociopath as it is go see a shrink and get your head straightened out.