he treats me like i am his daughter rather than his G/F?

Question

been with him almost 6 years, have never been unfaithful to him, never go out socialising without him, i dont even work i look after our 2yr old child and yet he treats me like one of his kids, in fact i feel like one of his kids i feel permanantly grounded, he checks every site i visit on my pc every day, checks the time i log in and out. i wanted to join a slimming class last week but he said he would be there too. the only place i go is to my mums and he moans i stay there too long! its really getting me down now. however he goes away fishing, has golf days out, had a full week way with his other kids and his EX! last summer, in the past he has even stayed at her house over night if we have argued and not just one night once he stayed at hers for nearly 2 months but all the time he slept there he made sure i never left the house! i find his behaviour to be very selfish and unfounded! he now accuses me of being addicted to pc yet he spends hours on ps2 and xbox360

on many occasions i have asked if we can talk about issues we have but he either just ignores me or gets mardy as soon as he hears summat he doesnt like and starts to argue

Answer 1

I would leave him. So what if you have a child..do not stay together for a child's sake..that messes them up more in the head, than splitting up. He is too possessive..and he wants a maid, and a nanny more than a girlfriend. Don't put up with it..just go out and do what you want to do, you have free will and a brain..use it. If he stays the night with his ex..(which is inexcusable) do something he doesn't like...Join the fitness club without him knowing...go out for coffee with your friends..he doesn't have to be on your hip...Independence is a good thing.

Answer 2

Oh i've been in almost exactly the same situation as you. You have to leave him - this is domestic abuse, constantly checking up on you all the time. I had such a hard time when i visited my parents once a week when i returned home. He'd go in a mood and try to prevent me seeing them. I ended up not being allowed to see or receive any phonecalls from my friends or my parents, having to go to my bed when i was told and being told what to eat etc, amongst many other things. It's mental torture and he was a control freak. He went to the pub every single night and had a huge circle of friends. I went on a diet and he went mad - i think he was scared i'd loose weight and maybe go off with someone else. You have to leave him - he has no right to control you. I left him in the end and although it was the hardest thing i have ever done, i feel a lot better now and more in control of my own life now. Best of luck and hey, you only live once - life is too short. x

Answer 3

i used to be in nearly the same situation as you, i was with a guy that was 10 years older them me i have a son with him too. What i would advise is to get out of there quick. Im sure you will find like me there is more support out there then you think. It has been 6 months nearly 7 since i moved away from my ex on the quite and slipped away with the kids. And after this time i now have a new boyfriend who treats me how a man should treat a woman, and he makes me feel special.

You have to think about what you want not him, is it doing your son any good him seeing your partner treat you this way do u want your son treating women in the same way his dad does?

Thats exactly what i done then plucked up the courage to get out of it.

hope this helps you
CheekyLady1984

Answer 4

Listen to what you are saying, really. Read this aloud. If a friend was saying this to you what would you tell them. LEAVE. It is unfortunate that you have a child together, it just makes things a little more harder. If you didn't have a child together, I bet you would have left years ago. My god, my parents treated me with more trust and respect than he treats you. He does not respect you, trust you, honour you, he might say that he loves you, but is this what love is? If he is staying at his ex's house, he must be there for a reason, what does she have that you don't. Stand up to him. Tell him to F off. Go to your moms with the child, tell him you're not coming home till__________ or not at all and seek out a lawyer/ women's shelter and find out what your rights are. Hell, if my husband did that to me, I would change the locks and tell him to leave me alone and go crawling back to his ex's. OMG girl, give your head a shake.

Is this the environment you want to raise your child in?
I don't know what gender your child is but
boy- will think that this is how to treat a woman
girl- will think that all men are a** holes and will have some serious trust issues.

Do it for yourself but most importantly, your little one.

Life is too short to be unhappy

Answer 5

emmmm WHY exactly are you with this man?? The words control freak spring to mind! No one has the right to dictate to another person on how to live their life!!! he obviously doesnt trust you and wants to know your every move - it must be like living in a box for you - you've lost your independence and freedom - hun you have to speak to this guy - if when you try he ignores you or turns it into a fight issue him with an ultimatium - either he listens or you walk.
You cant spend the rest of your life like this - you need to sort yourself out and either get him to change - probably through intensive councelling by the sounds of it - or you need to walk.
Good luck
xx

Answer 6

well... I've always told myself and my friends that if you have to ask the question it's because you already know the answer but don't want to face the truth, everyone is right, this is domestic abuse, he constantly checks up on you, told you he will basically stalk you and pretty much does what he likes whenever he wants, do you have contact with his ex? maybe you could talk to her about what their relationship was like? if you can trust in her. it's hard to face up to the truth for you and for him, he sounds like he is projecting his issues or behaviour on to you, it's easier for him to make it your problem than to admit it's his, i am fully aware of the effort and emotional investment you have put into this relationship but what are you getting from this relationship to make you stay?, it doesn't sound as though he is much of a decent father figure for your child, he doesn't give you or you relationship any respect, this is easy to say from outside the relationship but it is something that you will hopefully come to realise for yourself, if you want to stay with him then you need to try and sit him down calmly and discuss it with him without getting emotional, tell him what his behaviour is like and what it is doing to you and what you would like him to do and what you feel you would get out of it if things were different. (there are always other options!) x

Answer 7

I feel sorry for people like you , your partner is a control freak , wake up and smell the **** he comes out with. Two months at his ex's and he told you no rumpy pumpy went on ,you are having a laugh . Move on girl ,runaway,blow,get the f**k out of that relationship, take the kid and go. He will only end up DESTROYing any self respect you may have once had for yourself

Answer 8

this relationship is bordering on domestic violence,and you need to do something about it.
their are many reasons he treats you like a child,but none of them are any of your business,because you need only to cut your grass,and not his.
their are also many reasons why you are tolerating his behaviour,and that is your busioness, so go along and get some professional help,or take your problems to a friend who is sake to speak with ,and who will speak the truth to you.
if you go for professional help you may allow yourself to be vulnerable,dig deep, find some inner recources,and then perhaps your life will yield the fruit of true values.

Answer 9

both of you gotta sit down and talk things out.

both have a daughter together.

He's accuses you of using the computer till 3 am and then turn the pc back at 5a.m. Then he's asks us if that's normal.

I was the same way.

Than ur complaining about him playing his games.

Site down and talk to each other.

Best of Luck

Answer 10

i've got heard of this tale. one: do you think of the lady died through fact God needed her to die instead of healing her, or the guy did not get treatment for her. there are various the explanation why she would possibly not have been healed. the 1st is the daddy's prayer existence and his faith. God does pay attention and he does answer prayer. when I've prayed in the past God has enable me be conscious of that he does not answer it. Even then you fairly can proceed to prefer and get an answer you prefer from God. finally, God is Sovereign. The Bible additionally tells us to not "try" our God. If he had to prefer for healing for his daughter, he could have saved it quiet between himself and God. Myself, i does not have took any opportunities, i could have been praying whilst she substitute into getting her treatment. Secondly: why does the Bible say you will get carry of what you ask for? many human beings each and daily die from illnesses, organic mess ups, violence...and persons will pray for God to heal those human beings yet 9 cases out of ten they finally end up dying anyhow. The Bilbe says: And all issues, in any respect ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall get carry of. be conscious the "believing" section. i think of it incredibly is extremely not undemanding to have faith that God the author of the universe might look down and do what we desire. in case you have faith it, you might have it or he will supply you an answer why he won't make it easier to have it. unfold the affection 8-)