The only time I feel like number one and get my husbands undivided attention is when he wants sex. All other times he's busy, busy, busy. I don't get hugs, kisses, or just quality time enough. When I do, there's always some interruption. I must mention we have a baby. I'm sick of this. The last two days he's been doing "his own thing" and I'm left to do my own thing with the baby. When I finally get an attitude, he tells me I'm crazy! I am unhappy and sick of this man never seeing what he's doing wrong. What should I do. Withholding sex does not work. I'm dealing with a man with lots of pride here. When he gets mad, he acts like he could care less about anything especially anything I want. Help.
2007-01-29 10:28:43 · 12 answers · asked by tayy2004 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What you are talking about is him meeting your emotional needs.
Men can be so dense sometimes. Even if we do tell them what we need, they do not seem to get it.
What I have done was to try thinking about making a life for myself that does not include my husband. Find some hobbies. Find some new female freinds or work at renewing your old ones. Take a class. Go to church and attend a woman's Bible study.
Sometimes we can love our husbands to much. Depending upon them to meet our emotional needs. We can seem so emotionally needy to them that they run the other way.
Have you heard that training a husband is the same methods that we use to train our dogs. It is true. I took dog training class with our dog. Some husbands have developed bad habits and need to be retrained. Try it, it realy does work.
One thing to remember, always praise your husband when he does what you want him to do, when he treats you the way you want him to. For example, when he wants sex, say "Yes, but would you please (something you consider romantic) first. That turns me on."
2007-01-29 10:46:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's hard enough being married let alone with a baby! I have 4 kids and my husband works a lot also. after 8 years things are finally getting smoother....it takes time. You need to talk to him about this. Marriage is built on trust and communication. He is working hard to provide for you guys. Cut him a little slack. I know - he should cut you some - but be the bigger person. Extend love to him - do something for him that he would like. Talk to him....be patient. No one said marriage would be easy!
2007-01-29 18:38:52 · answer #2 · answered by Amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've come to understand that a lot of men are like that. I've felt the same way you have sometimes. What I have done is telling him how I feel, but without fighting. Just be honest to him and talk, when he is paying attention to you (after sex maybe). If he has a good heart, he'll understand, and will change, at least for a while.
2007-01-29 19:01:47 · answer #3 · answered by Inye 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well look how long did you 2 date before you got married. did you talk about how thing were going to be when you got married. The thing is do you ack like he is the most important thing in the world when he get home are you nagging him we like to feel like the king even when we are not. Try it and get back to us.
MAKE HIM FIRST
try it for 2 weeks
I now that's a long time but you got married for better or for worse.
Good luck
2007-01-29 18:41:10 · answer #4 · answered by the black hand 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Since talking isn't working,try action.I did with my hubby.Your hubby sounds just like mine used to be.I talked until I was blue in the face.Nothing changed.Then I decided to treat him the same way.He got the message and couldn't believe he was being that way towards me..Sometimes you have to "show" them when words fail...Good luck!
2007-01-29 19:03:19 · answer #5 · answered by ladybug 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
then you need to start doing things that you want to do instead of just waiting for him all the time. what do you want to do? go out with your friends. if you don't have any friends then make some. get a part time job and have your own bank account with your own income. you need to have your own source of income. get back in touch with your old friends. hang with your family. seek out your local newspaper and go to fun events with you and your baby. but don't go out looking like a mommy (and i don't say this to be mean) but put some effort into your appearance. look like a woman put together and go out and have your own fun. stop waiting for him. he is doing his own thing...now you have to do yours.
2007-01-29 19:14:26 · answer #6 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may want to initiate hugs, kisses or any affection, if you do, try a few more. Give an extra smile, compliment, words of encouragement, anything. I can guarantee he will return those favors. If you give you will receive, if not more! Try it and see what happens.
2007-01-29 18:52:30 · answer #7 · answered by SillyKimmie 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Give him a lap dance
2007-01-29 19:02:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want his attention, nudity usually works.
2007-01-29 19:05:37 · answer #9 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop wearing underwear, and see how long it takes for him to pay attention
2007-01-29 18:47:07 · answer #10 · answered by Doctor_Ashley_proctologist 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋