We went out last weekend to a bar and both times I came back from the bathroom she was talking to guys. She claims it wasn't anything, but it made me uncomfortable and I don't think she understands why. We have a history of trust issues. Am I just insecure and jealous?
2007-01-29 07:14:00 · 43 answers · asked by nhresident 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes you're insecure and jealous... Your wife is also being disrespectful to you.
2007-01-29 07:17:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
Wife Flirting At Bar
2017-01-18 22:29:43 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be that you are insecure, & jealous. You didn't elaborate about the trust issues.
I know that if I found my wife sitting & talking with strange guys at a bar, I would think. "Gee my wife has still got it. I am sure proud of her" But that is because we are secure in our relationship.
The last thing that I would think is that she's talking to those guys because she wants to make time with other men.
I am also confident that she can handle herself very well. I know that if guys were to move in on her out of my presence, that she could let them know what the score is real quick if she felt it necessary to do so, & she wouldn't lead any body on either.
You say that you felt uncomfortable when you saw her getting attention from other men, & you don't think she understands why. But do you?
You can't control all of those guys at the bars. & you can't control your wife either. But you can control your reaction to the situation. Give her credit for having the ability to handle the unwanted advances of other men. She's a big glrl.
2007-01-29 07:36:53 · answer #3 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u already know the answer to this, its up there in ur head. do what u think i s right. histoy of trust issues means someones been bold, if its her that did it, cut loose man, that kind of hurt never really goes away, not when u have to look at her all the time. u willknow when u are insecure and when u are jealous.
Other hand shes just a stunner and if thats what u want then ul have to get used to guys around her. even when u least xpect it they come sniffing, and they couldnt care less about your feelings in fact they would rather that u would just **** rite off!!!!!!
Havent u ever thought that about some guy that was with a gal u wanted?
at the very least u should be happy u have a gal, mines 2years and 5,000 miles away. whatever shes up to???????
She claims not anything also............ Hmmmmm.
Life will tell u soon enuf whats what,
2007-01-29 07:32:30 · answer #4 · answered by jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did your wife call these guys over? or did they start up with her? I mean really did you ask her? Guys do tend to talk to girls that are left alone at bars. I mean isn't that the norme? It just can't be helped. Sometimes it's hard to be RUDE and tell them to buzz off. So you converse with out really showing interest. It happens. Just walk up and smile and stand between your wife and the dudes... I don't know what type of trust issues you have but maybe a little therapy is needed. And if she hasn't been faithful in the past then i really suggest that THERAPY.
2007-01-29 07:28:32 · answer #5 · answered by SecretFriend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are insecure and jealous. It's not her issue, it's yours. You feel you are not "enough" or "good enough" for her and that she'll find someone better than you. So by keeping her from socializing with others you minimize the chance that she might find someone she likes better than you.
This is your own insecurity issue. If she wanted someone else she'd be with them.
Keep in mind, the jealous are troublesome to others and a torment to themselves.
Also, the jealous bring down the curse they fear most upon their own heads.
This simply means that your obsessive insecurity, your jealousy, will eventually just plain piss her off and she will leave you for someone less controlling that trusts her because they trust themselves, and their worth to her.
I love to watch my wife flirt. When we first met it was one of the things about her personality that attracted me to her. Why would I want her to change that? Then she wouldn't be the woman I wanted to marry.
2007-01-29 07:41:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they were just talking then that's not flirting. If she was hanging on them and stuff like that then i would be concerned. If you have trust issues because of what she did in the past then you need to go to a marriage counselor because if you still can't get over the past your always going to have trust issues and trust is a must have in any relationship.
2007-01-29 07:33:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a history of trust issues why not seek some help to over come tho's, but not many people do! maybe it's just you! i don't see any harm in just talking to male, that's what people do when they go out drinking! just have a good time don't be paranoid..... If she's been unfaithful before and can't trust her why you with her!!..... ( it's not just respect! you should be able to trust your lover 100% other wise what's the point ) Flirting just a part of socializing there's no harm with limits....
2007-01-29 07:23:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it all depends on how she was talking to them....was she talking sexy t them....did she act funny when you came back.....i don't ever really go out that much anymore but if i was at the bar and my husband went to do something and came back and i was talking to guys, girls don't matter i introduce him as "this is my husband rock" she's not gonna cheat in front of you, but if you are that insecure and jealous and you guys have trust issues you need to work them out....you can't maintain a relationship on no trust.....you're probably overreacting
2007-01-29 07:27:01 · answer #9 · answered by ramos_luanne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With a "history of trust issues", it's probably not good form for your wife to be too friendly with strange men. However, you brought her to the bar and it's not like she's there by herself. I don't think you have resolved those trust issues, yet, and that may take some marriage counseling to deal with it.
2007-01-29 07:18:16 · answer #10 · answered by Yo' Mama 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
From a woman's point of view, I like to flirt with guys at bars, once in a while, It makes me feel good about myself in a weird way, you know? But TALKING to men is not a crime, and that's basically all it is is talking, now if she was hitting on them like giving her #, asking them out, talking about sex, or whatever, that would be different, But people go to bars to sociolize, be it with men or women. I have tons of fun, weither my boyfriend is there or not, I don't pick up anyone, and at the end of the night i'm going home with him-and he knows it (he DOES get jealous if i am talking to a man but he knows I love him) why dont you talk to her about it again if it still bothers you?
2007-01-29 07:24:48 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋