All of you are not reading the question. I said that was an example of what I have found in agreements that I didn't consider. Boy, AMericans really ARE quite judgmental, aren't they? Anyway, I will repeat the question and PLEASE READ. Thanks. I am asking for other examples, not comments on the examples that I found.
What are some things that you wish you had included in your divorce agreement but didn't?
I have looked at EXAMPLES and so far the only thing that I have found that I had left out of my notes was that the husband cannot bring girlfriends, concubines or the new wife (or males filling those roles, if that is the case) to any events for the children, i.e., weddings, graduation, school plays, sporting events, recitals, demonstrations, plays, etc. There will be no birthday celebrations except those held at either his home or hers (e.g., no Chucky Cheese's) unless both parties consent and neither party will take the children out of town on their birthdays.
2007-01-29 06:48:31 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
These people are OBVIOUSLY the adulterers who ended the marriage. Pay no attention to them. What you should include is some written agreeent as far as tax filing. You should also not file or agree to anything until a year has passed because that way every issue will come up, including holidays, so you can then have a good idea of what you want and need and what is best for the children.
It is sad that they are still looking for excuses as to why they bailed. Who needs to grow up? Maybe they CAN'T read?
I catually have a coworker who put the "no spouses or significant other at the weddings language in her divorce decree. She said that it has really come in handy given that they have four kids. Her new husband can't attend either.
Good luck, D.
2007-01-29 08:00:38 · answer #1 · answered by realistnola 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure you are getting it.
We are saying that we would NOT put those things in a divorce decree.
It sure sounds like you want them.
Comments on what you wrote are quite reasonable. We are doing ask you ask, by saying we would not put those into an agreement and believe them to be unrealistic.
I have judged the items. If you feel judged, then I'm sorry. They do seem controlling.
My comments stand as written.
I suspect you have suffered an unfaithful husband. If this is the case, I am really sorry. I suffered an unfaithful wife, so I believe I have some understanding about the pain of seeing a former spouse with an affair partner.
I am sorry you had to suffer such a horrible, painful event in your life.
2007-01-29 06:55:11 · answer #2 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
How many times are you going to post questions on this topic anyway??? I have counted at least five in a row, so far. Wow!
You don't have to jump down everyone's throat here. We are just trying to answer your question the best way we know how. I feel my original response was helpful and not at all judgemental. And by the way, in saying all Americans are judgemental, aren't you really being judgemental, yourself?
I know you've been hurt in your marriage, but you need to calm down, lady. I'm sorry I took the time to write out my very thoughtful response to you earlier. There went three minutes of my life that will never be appreciated. You don't seem like a very reasonable person. I do hope you'll work on this aspect of your personality for the sake of your poor children. Good luck to you.
2007-01-29 07:16:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right. I don't get it.
A divorce decree relates to how I deal with the ex wife NOT how I deal with MY children. You do not have the right to put that crap in a decree. It limits how I would relate to MY children and my life.
You don't get it.
If I divorce you I have divorced YOU. You would not get that crap through on my divorce. But the you would have to fight me for custody as well. After all they are MY children. If you want to see them at their graduations or school functions you would have to deal with my new partner because the kids would be with US.
2007-01-29 07:02:03 · answer #4 · answered by Flagger 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How about "now that we are divorced, you can not longer tell me what I can and cannot do. If I want to bring my new wife to anything, it is my right. Just because I found someone better, does not mean she should not be included."
It sounds to me like you need to grow up.
2007-01-29 06:55:33 · answer #5 · answered by Lissa 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Asking for anything like the examples you have given shows that YOU don't get it. You are getting divorced, you don't get a say in his life any more. Perhaps your control issues were a factor in the failed marriage?
2007-01-29 07:07:50 · answer #6 · answered by jonmm 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
they say that frustration is the first step on the ladder to violence - at level 4 - with anger being second and aggression third...
I am neither judgmental or american but wow do you have a problem with asking polite questions
so what is it you want?
2007-01-29 06:56:40 · answer #7 · answered by JAYFIRE 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think Lissa's answer is the best I have ever seen on here. I agree 100%.
2007-01-29 07:33:48 · answer #8 · answered by Lotus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋