I have a friend who is getting married this year. For a few weeks she has been cheating on her fiance. She is so nonchalant about it...saying stuff like "I can't go shopping with you on Tuesday, Tuesday is my 'cheating day'," and things like that. He is my friend too, and I hate to see him get treated like that. I want to write a note and send it to him and just say something like "Jane is cheating on you with Mike Jones. On Tuesday when you think shes shopping, shes not, she is at Mike Jones's house". How wrong would that be? I have tried to dissuade her from getting married. It's not working.
2007-01-29 06:21:49 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't think she would be my friend much longer.
I think I'd share with her that she is my friend, but so his her fiance, and that you believe she should call of the wedding until she can be totally faithful.
Explain that either she shares this with her fiance, or if she hasn't by the end of some time period, you will present him with the facts.
She will probably not like this, and may not want to be your friend anymore. Frankly, what kind of friend cheats on the person who she claims will be number one in her life.
How good a friend could she be to you if she treats him this way?
2007-01-29 06:27:36 · answer #1 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could you arrange it so the fiance runs into you when you are supposed to be shopping? Or maybe a close friend of his or his mom? She is using you and putting you in the middle. This needs to be straightened out before there are any children involved! Type the note and get it to him yes bad stuff will hit the fan but it will sooner or later anyway.
2007-01-29 07:29:15 · answer #2 · answered by Star of Florida 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a tough question.. Alot of people would say that its none of your business and that you should stay out of it.. However, for the sake of your guy-friend who is excited about spending the rest of his life with his 'loyal' girlfriend who 'loves' him in the same way that he loves her and proud that he can satisfy her and not worry about her looking for anyone else... I mean, what kind of marraige would that be? How would it end? It is right to exchange vows of undying, unconditional love when she is screwing someone else? If you were engaged and your friend knew that your fiance was sleeping with other women, what would you want your friend to do? Would you want to know or go into a marraige blindsided? The choice it yours... I would tell though.. But i would also know that the friendship between the woman and you WILL end... and the relationship between you and the guy MAY end if she denies it and he wants to believe her over you... It could backfire...
2007-01-29 06:30:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I loved that Mike Jones was the fake name, it made me laugh. I think if you notify him it should be anonymously, send him a typed note or something, but you don't want it to be linked back to you. I think since she told you about it she's involved you and you have the right to take action. If she wanted to keep things a secret she shouldn't have told you. I think it is bad to go into a marriage where someone is already unfaithful. What happens when they add children to their family? I think your intentions are good and genuine.
2007-01-29 06:57:36 · answer #4 · answered by JT 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No it is not wrong at all. if your friend is cheating on her fiance then it's not really love. marriage is about a sacred bond and 'cheating' is wrong. i really do think that you should tell but not with a note. first confront the friend and tell her that what she is doing is wrong. then have her or you personally tell him. it's a little cold to just write it in a note. and remember---it is better that you tell now because if this continues they are not going to have a good life together and you'll be the one with regrets also.
2007-01-29 06:29:50 · answer #5 · answered by Josee G 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Truth is the best answer, if the husband to be is your friend it will make you miserable trying to hid what your friend is doing. If the right opportunity arises for you to tell the husband to be then tell him and clear your conscience, don't get pulled into the lies, but do it with concern and empathy not like someone trying to get someone in trouble. It would be much better to find it out now than after the marriage. Wish you the best of luck.
2007-01-29 06:41:05 · answer #6 · answered by HowAboutIt 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What would you do if the roles were reversed? Im sure you would want to know right. Tell this guy what your friend is doing and if your friend beomes a ***** over it then she's not a real friend. This guy is being played for a fool. Do you want them entering into marriage based on all lies? This guy is living a lie and doesn't even know it.
2007-01-29 07:42:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the man is your friend too ... STAY OUT OF IT!!! If you wanted to write an anonymous note ... that would cause a lot of trouble. Are you willing to lose your girlfriend - who sounds like she needs some help, seriously - over this? I think I may be ... cuz if she'd cheat on her man, there's no telling what she'd do to you! Just so that you can avoid drama ... I say stay out of it. But if you think you can do the note and not get caught ... then do what your heart tells you to do. Maybe ask your husband or a male friend of his opinion if he were in that position ... that can definitely help in a situation like this! Good Luck!
2007-01-29 06:27:20 · answer #8 · answered by msdrdn 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Oh jeez. This is horrible. I have a friend who is f-ing two married men and she is very nonchalant about it too. It must be especially hard for you since the fiancee is your friend as well. I probably would let him know somehow. He does not deserve this. What a whore.
2007-01-29 07:10:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you ought to tell the guy in a manner that no person is attentive to IT grew to become into YOU. ok? So brainstorm (I frequently arise with sturdy recommendations yet i won't be able to be stricken good now) some recommendations on the thank you to maintain them the two as acquaintances, no longer smash the promise and on a similar time, tell the guy what's befell Like in case you provide him a letter, explaining and tell him to no longer tell his gf which you advised him
2016-09-28 03:52:36 · answer #10 · answered by arieux 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋