What are some things that you wish you had included in your divorce agreement but didn't?

Question

I have looked at examples and so far the only thing that I have found that I had left out of my notes was that the husband cannot bring girlfriends, concubines or the new wife (or males filling those roles, if that is the case) to any events for the children, i.e., weddings, graduation, school plays, sporting events, recitals, demonstrations, plays, etc. There will be no birthday celebrations except those held at either his home or hers (e.g., no Chucky Cheese's) unless both parties consent and neither party will take the chikdren out of town on their birthdays.

I have heard all too often where the poor bride is miserable during the wedding or kids at graduation because of the tension or fights. (Don't say grow up- if it were that simple would there be a need for this at all?) If this is resolved early on, the new people know this going in.

Answer 1

if you haven't already...make sure you work out funding for education as well as spell out what types of educational facilities they can attend (Universities, Community Colleges, Trade Schools, etc.), cars and who will pay what when the child reaches driving age, payment for graduation extras like invites, cap/gown, etc. (they really add up!!), as well as all the items that are normal when there are children in a marriage: medical, dental, vision, religion, insurance, clothing allowance, etc.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Well, it's your life and your decision, but I'm not sure that's a very good idea, for the kids' sake. Kids don't understand legalities of things like that and all they know is that this person who their dad loves and is a huge part of their life never comes to support them in their activities. I think it sends a mixed message and will only make the children even more confused and frustrated than they already are.

I know it's hard to imagine being civil to your new husband's significant other, but I think that if all the adults in a child's life can be in the same room together and actually do so without fighting, that is in the best interest of the kids. Think about how you would feel and how your new future husband (who your kids loved very much and vice versa) would feel if he could NEVER attend these special things just because of some divorce agreement from years before. I think it's just asking for trouble.

Answer 3

Perhaps you could go as far as girlfriends or concubines, but I don't think you can leave out his spouse should he choose to re-marry.

Furthermore, as long as something is not life threatening, then you really can't spell out those sorts of things. I doubt a court would allow a divorce decree that indicated dad can't take his kids to Chuck E Cheese or Disneyworld for their birthday.

You may not agree with his choices. I certainly don't agree with the choices made by my unfaithful ex-wife. But I wouldn't keep her from seeing her boyfriend or taking my daughter to Disneyworld, etc.

The other things, such as no overnight stays of a woman he's not married to, sure. Restricting who he can take to the school play, no cool, no matter how much it hurts you.

It's about the children, remember. So if it hurts you, you have to be the bigger person and get over it. It's better to have dad there at the play, even with his girlfriend or wife, than it is to have dad absent in most cases.

Answer 4

i replaced into divorced without representation. The sources have been split spectacular down the midsection. I knew he could no longer be hiding money, no longer plenty besides, if any in any respect. He filed for divorce, although I asked for the divorce. So he paid a attorney, and that i did no longer experience i wanted one. i replaced into jogging away with a great volume of money. The divorce papers have been signed beforehand of time, i did no longer even show up to court docket. i did no longer might desire to. purely look the papers over heavily. as long as you be attentive to the place all the investments have been over the years, there is not any longer something he can conceal. And, by potential of regulation, if he has hidden something (including triumphing the lottery recently and not telling you he has the triumphing fee ticket) you nevertheless get a million/2 later. you may return to court docket in case you detect out later he replaced into hiding something. I enable my ex have his pension. I did take a million/2 the 401k, yet I had additionally sacrificed to construct that up. I took a million/2 the fairness, and we agreed on furnishings, custody, the cat, etc.

Answer 5

holidays......
birthdays.....
weekends....
weekly visitations.....
**establish something in there that he can not take the child(ren) out of town unless there is a written consist that includes addresses and telephone numbers to where the children will be located....
If I think of anything more I will let you know...

Answer 6

may i say that as being from a divored marraige myself, my ex is re-married now, and you cant take his new wife out of the picture.thats being selfish.just because you dont want to see her ,she will still be a step mom to your kids and a part of thier life.even if he doesnt have one yet, you need to decide things that only affect you and him, not your kids

Answer 7

there are so many things, like sporting events, vehicles and what to do when the kids don't want to go with him for the weekend....

Answer 8

I wish my ex husband would have been sent to the Moon.

Answer 9

My wish....that the dog had gone with her

Her wish...that would never be allowed to be happy again