i m 35 yrs now n maried since 5yr. I m not earning enough to take responsibility of a child atleast i think. And trying to get betear job and puting best efort 4 this. But i have 2 younger bros also earning nicely n going 2 mary. Am i doing right 2 not 2 be parent by now? I love kids but my chikd wil be only if i can take care them. An i wrong?
2007-01-29 04:42:49 · 14 answers · asked by uday m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you do not feel that you are ready for the responsibility of a baby, either emotionally or financially, then how can you be wrong by chosing to wait till you are in a better position? But I guess the question is, are you really doing all that you can to get into a better position, or are you just saying that you are trying? There's a difference, and if your wife is pressuring you to have kids, and your excuse is that you aren't financially "there" yet, she may be impatient with your lack of effort.
2007-01-29 04:50:58 · answer #1 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are either ready for kids or not. Money is not what makes a good kid. I am also 35 and have 2 kids ( 10 and 12 ). Both born when I made very little money and are both very happy. I make more money now and they get the nicer things in life, are they better kids because I make more money? No, they are great kids because they have two parents who love them, take care of them, and get involved in what they are doing.
So if money is your only excuse then yes you are wrong, if you just don't want kids then you just don't want kids.
2007-01-29 04:51:12 · answer #2 · answered by UT FAN 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is your life your right to do what's right for you. Remember that nobody is ever really ready for a child but people tend to make it work and every things turns fine.
So if you want a child then do it, the time will never be just right. If you don't then don't, if you get older and more prepared and really feel the need to have a child in your life then concider adoption there are so many children out there already who need someone to love them.
2007-01-29 04:52:34 · answer #3 · answered by tonafun 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are not doing anything wrong but I would suggest if you want a child to make some changes in your life,. The avg cost to raise a child is well ..alot. I am sure your wife wants to have a family also, sit down, make a budget, talk it through and bring a child into this world, love them, care for them and give them your very best.
2007-01-29 04:49:59 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you dont think u are ready yet than you may not be listen to your heart and follow what it says. When the time comes the time will be there. Alot of people out there think they are ready to be a parent and turn out not ready. Do what you feel is best for u and if u were to have a child what is best for that child. Good luck sweetie I wish u the best.
2007-01-29 04:52:56 · answer #5 · answered by smile114 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
no your not wrong waiting until you find a better job earning more money is the right thing to do i have a 3 year old and it's not easy but i do have a good job and that allows me to take care of him and home. wait until you find a better job then start saving your money and when you have enough then start talking about kids and stuff .like that.
2007-01-29 04:51:11 · answer #6 · answered by lasondraperry-graham 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes you are doing right by chosing not to have children right now. children are expensive. and i'm not talking about fiancially either..physically, emotionally...they are expensive period. it's very rare that people do actually think about what it will take to have children before actually making the decision. because only after it's too late do they realize just how much work is involved. but good for you.
2007-01-29 04:59:45 · answer #7 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, everyone has different view on how they want to raise children. You have to do what you think is best. If you don't make enough money to raise a child in your opinion, then find a better paying job. don't worry what others think about it. It's your life...
2007-01-29 04:50:56 · answer #8 · answered by LittleLady 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just FYI...the average estimated cost to raise a newborn to age 17 is now $250,000. That's just to age 17!! That doesn't include sending them to college!!!
You are wise to not have a baby.
2007-01-29 04:56:01 · answer #9 · answered by Back in the game... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO, you are smart. You are the one who is mature enough to understand that children cost a lot of money. It is a much better decision to wait until you feel financially secure! Good Luck!
2007-01-29 04:49:59 · answer #10 · answered by Nunya 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋