Tricking into pregnancy?

Question

I have a friend who wants a baby so bad. She is tricking her boyfriend into getting her pregnant. He already has a 7 year old son and he doesn't want anymore. She told him that she is getting the Depo shot for birth control. And with the depo shot...it is "almost" 100% effective. She told him that there was NO way that she could get pregnant on this shot. So, now they are using no protection. This is wrong..I love my friend, but she is being really unfair her boyfriend. Should I say something...or keep quite?

When I said that she is telling him she is taking Depo. She is only telling him. She is NOT taking it.

Answer 1

Say something. This is potentially a child's life and she is obviously too immature to handle a child. Plus, they aren't even in a long-term commitment (marriage) yet and probably won't be if she is deceptive. Try talking to her first. Good Luck!

Answer 2

TELL HIM!!!!! A woman that tricks a man into getting her pregnant is no woman at all but a low life tramp sorry to say that about your so called friend but it is the truth. Has she even talked to him about why he doesnt want more kids and if she does this when a custody battle arises you will have to testify that it was a planned deception if it comes to that. If your friend wants a baby so bad why does she need her bf unless they are so in love that they plan on getting married but if she gets pregnant that will go down the drain fast. Tell him her plans and then tell her if she is desperate either have one night stands or go to a sperm bank for a mystery donor unless she plans on trapping her bf for child support since she isnt finacially ready for raising a baby on her own and if that is the case tell her to stop and think about how many moms get screwed because dads dont pay child support and if she loses a custody battle then she would pay a butt load of money so its a lose lose situation.

Answer 3

Actually, she's lying to him, faking an orgasm....that would be tricking him, there's a difference between flat out deception and playing a trick on someone.

However, he evidently wouldn't mind having another baby, or he's just plain ignorant, NOTHING but abstinence is a 100% effective birth control method, so if/when she gets pregnant, and he's not responsible enough to do HIS part (i.e. wear a condom for starters, at least make an attempt, even though there's no guarantee!) then I'm sure it's because he's planning on being responsible after she's pregnant.

Answer 4

Maybe your friend's outlook on the whole situation is cloudy because of her extreme desire to have children. She needs a reality check, bad. If you feels strongly about this, say something. If you let it go and still feel that the situation is horrible (which it is) it will just eat at you. It's better to say something and be honest with your friend how you feel than nothing at all. But that's just me. I would rather risk hurting someone's feelings a little at the beginning of a problem versus really being ripped up later. She is being deceptive and dishonest. Maybe a heads up through a friend of the her boyfriend is necessary. All I can say is I'm floored, that's a horrible thing to do to someone.

Answer 5

I would definetly say something. Not because you are going to be noisy into their business but because your friend needs to realize that a baby is a human person and if he doenst want any more children right now she needs to respect that and not bring an unwanted child into this world. It is not the childs fault. I knew someone who once did this but didnt come out with the truth until after the baby was born. Well it ended up that their relationship faultered and the mother nor the father wanted the baby and the baby went into a foster home? Remind your friend that it is not the babies fault on what happens in their little life its the parents but they are always the ones that suffer threw the situation. She needs to check herself and you do need to get involved. Any good friend would and I think your thoughts about it already told you that you need to interfere. I wish you well and I do hope that it is stopped before a little human is developed and sad because of either not having a mother or a father to share their life with.

Answer 6

YES! Tell him now. Why should he get stuck with a lying horrible girl like your friend. She is nasty and selfish. By not being honest with him in anyway he is being led to believe something that is totally untrue when he was already totally honest with her about his feelings on wanting children. Why can't she just go find a guy who wants to have children with her instead of screwing this guy over by scamming him over? Why should a baby have to suffer by having a dad that didn't want them in the first place or may never be in that baby's life. Your friend is super selfish and needs to be shut down now before a baby does get conceived with her stupid selfish game! He has rights and any potential baby has rights. Your friend needs to respect her boyfriends wishes not to be a father and move on. He probably already has very good reasons why he doesn't want another child. Help him now and maybe find a better friend to call your friend. You seem like you have your head screwed on straight and your friend is a wacko!

Answer 7

say something to her every chance you get, but not to her boyfriend. He will dump her and a later she will find the "shot" worked and to expect the stork in 9 months. Drop hints everywhere.
Try dry cleaning her favorite coat and tell her about this new place/ solvent which will make you never have to dry clean it again, but th catch is it is is "almost" 100% effective. Then make a huge stain [near the hem] so she will get the point. Yes she will be angry, but you did not commit a life changing act, she did. Maybe if you do this it will not ruin her relationship with her boyfriend, create a life which she will have to take care of with or without her boyfriend's help, and preserve your friendship.
I commend you for trying to help your friend, that is what a true friend does, help/save you friend from herself. Please keep trying. But be supportive to whatever happens, she will need you and true friend do not say "i told you so" when/if her life goes down the drain.

Answer 8

This is really difficult, what she is doing is so wrong u need to have a really good talk with her and try to make her see sense, i understand this is a difficult situation as u risk losing the friendship through getting involved, but these kind of relationships where a man is 'trapped' never work out in the end, the truth nearly always comes out and there cant be any respect there to decieve him in the first place.
Advice her to talk to her man herself and tell him how much she wants a child.

Answer 9

Talk to your friend. But before you do that educate yourself, and bring her the info to read over. She needs to understand that for the next 20 years (give or take) she will be responsible for this child in many different ways, such as: emotional needs, physical needs, monetary needs, and many other needs. Tell her how much it will cost per month to make it work. That includes food, clothing, toys, diapers, formula, doctors, insurance, gas, etc. PLUS there is also the chance that she will lose her boyfriend by being so dishonest. This is a NASTY trick to play on someone. Do what you can to stop her!

Answer 10

In my opinion it is none of your business. I am not sure why your friend thought that she could trust you with this kind of personal information to begin with, she should have kept it to herself.
You will do more damage than good if you tell her boyfriend.
It is her life and you have no right getting involved.
Just pretend that you don't know.
Much that is wrong with the world these days is that people no longer know when to mind their own business.
Aside from child abuse you do not have the right to pry into a person's personal life.
BTW, you do know that if you say something to this man it will be the end of your friendship with this woman. You need to ask yourself if it is worth it. My friendships are worth more to me than that. I have to wonder why you feel this sense of loyalty to the man in this scenario.
I would keep quiet.

Answer 11

I think you should tell him ~ or make her realize that she is making a huge mistake. If he doesn't want any more kids then she should respect that. Can you imagine that kid growing up with out a Dad or knowing that he wasn't wanted~ that's just horrible. You obviously have a conscious and you know right from wrong...do the right thing~ Good Luck!!