Marriage Help!!?

Question

My husband and I don't get along anymore and things are really stressfull here. I am pregnant and I am afraid that if I leave I will be alone when I go into labor, but I really don't know if I can handle the verbal abuse and everyday fighting much longer.

Answer 1

Sit down with him and tell him that if he wants the marriage to work he needs to go to counseling with you. You will not tolerate the abuse anymore and will not raise a child around it.

Answer 2

Just try separating for a little while, then after a couple of months (more or less if necessary) sit down talk about what are bothering the two of you. If both of you can't agree on something (or everything) compromise where the both of you will be happy in this marriage and soon to be a 3 member family. Stay together for a couple of weeks and evaluate your situation:
- How many times a day have yall fought?
- How often do you tell each other how much you love them?
- Do the both of you trust each other?
- Are yall happy with the outcome?

Similar questions like these will help you make your decision. If nothing has changed then see if one of your family members will help until you and your child get in your feet. Let me tell you this, you will not be alone, you are never alone; the Lord will be with you. To me, that's all I would need. God does things for a reason, for a GOOD reason. And whatever you are going through just remember God knows and he will take care of you and your baby. JUST TRUST IN HIM.

Answer 3

First of all, be really honest with yourself and see if it is the pregnancy that has brought this on. We fought allot more when I was pregnant, but it was a very high risk one that required frequent hospital stays then total bed rest. With my hormones, and stress, then him having to do everything and the stress of worry for me and the baby it made everything seem impossible. When you are pregnant, it is wise to not make any life changing decisions, if at all necessary. With that said, if you really know that this is something that has been there before, as in the abuse and fighting, don't stay because you are afraid of being alone. There are allot of hospitals now that will provide a Douala, or a special nurse to stay with you. Also, think about any possible family or friends that could be there. Don't end up thinking that staying in the relationship would be better for the child. My parents were abusive to themselves both verbally, and physically, and stayed together for us. All we ever wanted for them to do was divorce. Witnessing abusive parents is really more dangerous for children than not having your parents together. I wish you strength and courage through your troubled time!

Answer 4

I am so sorry to hear that. I know all too well that if your not happy there is no reason to stay. You should never stay just for the baby. I did that and ended up wasting 12 years of my life with my soon to be ex-husband. He was verbally abusive and always promised to change. The fact is they may try but it always comes back to the same old thing. My ex and I are the best of friends now and our kids are happy. Of course if things were good until you got pregnant you should sit back and look at the reason for your unhappiness and make sure it really is him.

Good Luck ! ! !

Answer 5

One question for you. Do you love him? Answer it honestly. If it is no, then it's not worth the stress. Would he go to counseling with you? If not, do you think he's putting his best effort into the relationship? You would not be doing your precious baby any favors by staying with an abusive man. She will learn from him, too. Would you want your baby growing up believing that's how relationships are? It may be hard to be a single mom, but you can do it. Raise that baby to know what a loving relationship is.

Answer 6

oh my dear, this is bad.. do you have family or friends you can turn to.. you need to leave.. you cannot go through any kind of abuse while pregnant.. there are many single parents out there, you can do it.. you do not need a mad mad around when you have a baby. He obviously needs to change. Let me tell you something else, being under constant stress will put you in pre-term labor, you dont want that.. go visit family or be somewhere where you are calm.. god be with you :)

Answer 7

First stress is not good on you or your baby!!
Ask him if he is willing to go to a marriage counselor, and see if that will help.. and if he don't then you are better off with out him
and just stay with a friend when it is time for your due date. You do not want you child growing up in a place where you are being abused, it will effect your child
and you don't want him/her to grow up thinking that it is okay to talk to a women the way his dad does or her thinking that it is okay to take the way a man is talking to her.
Please think of you child!!!!!When you stress the child inside of you will stress

Answer 8

There are loads of stress put on a marriage with a pregnancy and the birth of a child. You two need to find ways to destress together, mutual messages, quiet walks together or other things you do together that has nothing to do with the everyday world can help you to both relax and might help to provide you some time to discuss your fears and concerns with the pregnancy and how the changes are impacting each of you.

Answer 9

the stress during your pregnancy can cause low birth weight and cause emotionial issues with the baby (IE inconsolable crying and low tolerance to stress) my advice is seperate even if for a time to cool things down and seek marriage counseling alone if he wont go. also better to be alone during labor than live in unhappiness, if you have a midwife deliver your baby she will stay with you the entire labor , or seek a doula (pregnancy support person) or ask a friend or familiy member to be in the delivery room,is thi your hubbys first baby? my husband was such a jerk when i was pregnant with his, being a jerk was his way of coping with the stress of the coming baby. good luck hon!

Answer 10

Get the verbal recorded cause it is abuse and grounds for divorce, and you can have a baby your self and raise it yourself and do anything you want, there are people to help you just pick up the phone and a phone book and get to dialing.