Previous caught him logging into a dating site for intimate encounters, and emails from another woman before that, of course he denied that any of it was his rather it was his cousins.
Of course lately he's been more respectful of me, but I'm just not feeling it anymore.
2007-01-28 17:39:47 · 28 answers · asked by MsTrust 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Another bit of info: I felt pressured into marrying him before I was ready because he needed someone to sponsor him to live here.
2007-01-28 17:54:30 · update #1
You said that you're "just not feeling it anymore." - In that case, it may be time to cut your losses and leave before it gets anymore complicated. However, every marriage goes through its ups and downs. It's not always fun - but it's always something that you have to work at. You owe it to yourself, the man you love/d, and any children you may have to at least try and work it out before you throw in the towel.
2007-01-28 17:45:48 · answer #1 · answered by karespromise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you caught him in the act and he denied it, he could probably just be fooling around with the site and didn't want you to get the wrong idea or he could be fooling around behind you. You need to talk with him and voice out your displeasure. A lot of marriages breakdown coz of lack of communication or misunderstandings due to a lack of communication.
The fact that he's being more respectful could mean he's realised his mistake or he's sensing the coldness in you towards him. The fact that you felt pressured into marriage isn't something nice to begin with but I've seen marriages in such situations last longer than a love marriage. The decision to stay or leave is entirely your own. Search your heart and see if he still has a place in it. Think without your heart to see a better picture of the past and if the future is better with or without him.
Hope you get your happiness soon :)
2007-01-29 02:31:29 · answer #2 · answered by rene 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Truly look into yourself and search for the answer. I'm sorry that he was like that in the past, but does the new good outweigh the old life that he had. Plus you have to look at the fact that he lyed to you. Will he do it again. There are so many questions that you have to answer. The easiest answer is to leave him with out thought, but does that help your future. i'm sorry to say this but you are the only person to answer this question. honestly if you have lost and you don't see the love coming back, drop him. if you just don't feel that he is trying hard enough, but you still love, give it a little bit longer and see if he has truly changed, if not, there will always be someone else that you can find later on inlife.
2007-01-29 01:55:29 · answer #3 · answered by Mamma M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men do some really stupid things,, like getting caught sneaking a peek at porn sites, giving out info that should remain private, (email addresses) trying to conceal what they know is going to cause problems, hurt feelings, distrust, ect. Why? Most men don't really know the answer to that themselves. The reason they do stupid things when they love their wives is mostly a symptom of immaturity,, and they like the attention.
As for you feeling like you were pressured into a marriage,, that's worse than your husband's behavior,, no less of a betrayal to him than what he's done to you. And, it's also illegal to marry someone for the sole purpose of qualifying them for immigration.
If it's not there,, you ain't gonna be any happier a year from now than you are now. Neither will he.
2007-01-29 04:56:50 · answer #4 · answered by tee_nong_noy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me say that I am in a similar situation, except my husband is not in dating sites, but into porn. If your husband is going into intimate dating sites, then there is something going on with him. He most likely is not cheating on you, but the thought might be in his head, and the best way is to try and get him to open up about it, or it WILL only get worse. Try looking on the Dr. Phil website, he has alot of information on there that could be of help, at least it helped me. But if you really do not want to leave him even though you are unhappy, you have to get to the bottom of this, and fast. I wish you all the luck with this and I hope I was of help to you.
2007-01-29 01:50:30 · answer #5 · answered by sneekygirl69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did he go to that site, knowing he was married and that it would upset everything, if he found someone or if he got caught. If the marriage was important to him, he should of thought it out, Men are so ignorant at times, do they think they can keep acting like they do and we will stay, I say tell him its over as far as your feelings for him, the trust is gone. good luck to you
2007-01-29 01:53:20 · answer #6 · answered by spuds_suds 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been hurt. Of course you aren't feeling it anymore. Before you call it quits, you might want to consider some marriage counseling especially if you have children. But if he actually cheated...I would probably be out the door.
2007-01-29 01:49:40 · answer #7 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is all you need..talk and see just how far much better things will be. make it like a TV time if you have to say "Hun every night at say 8pm lets just have a quite time and talk to each other" hey whats the hurt try it out
2007-01-29 01:52:58 · answer #8 · answered by Gina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nah. Get out girl. He's not the one. If you stay, you're not going to meet the guy who treats you like the queen you are.
Plus, you know he's lying. They're not his cousins. You know better than that.
Don't settle!
2007-01-29 01:53:06 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whatever the reason for marriage you are now married. if he is showing actions of working at the relationship favorably then why not reciprocate and try to enjoy the change. peace
2007-01-29 01:57:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋