my wife of three years says i'm not the best sex she's ever had?

Question

we have sex regularly but now I have trouble finishing because the fact that i'm not the best really bothers me

Answer 1

You're actually QUITE fortunate that she revealed that to you.
You could have gone on for the rest of your marriage being less than the best...
but now that you know this...it's time to become the best lover she's ever had or dreampt of.
Start communicating, learn what makes her tick.
Get creative...be proactive
or you could end up cheated on.
Trust me darlin' I've been married for 20 and my husband wasnt even closest to being the best...now he gets NONE!

Answer 2

You don't say how this little revelation was obtained, but if you asked if you were the best, you sort of got what you deserved, especially if you begged her to be honest and tell you the truth.

The fact of the matter is that she CHOSE you, not the other guy that gave her life-changing orgasms. That should tell you something about her - and women in general. There are other things - a LOT of other things - that are more important than good sex to a woman. (I think reading a good book ranked slightly ahead of good sex in a survey done several years ago.)

Since you opened up this can of worms, you might as well sit down with your wife and tell her that it is bothering you and why it is. If she is wise, she will comfort you with other reasons for loving you. And, if she is brilliant as well as wise, she will suggest that there are some things that you could do together to make the sexual experiences more thrilling. Keep your expectations realistic, though.

Understand that all married sex becomes somewhat routine over time and that the sex that your wife is having in a committed relationship is not likely to be equal to the brain explosions that she experienced with her first sexual experiences.

Work together on this. And, let some of the air out of your bloated male ego. You have a whole life to live together. Get past this unfortunate little hiccup and move on. If you just can't find a way to deal with it, get counseling.

Answer 3

Your wife made a grave mistake. Why in the hell would she tell you that? It's too bad that she had to go and make you doubt yourself. I can honestly say I don't think your wife is too smart. Now what? She's pretty much ruined sex for the rest of your two's relationship. If she tries to fix this by telling you the opposite you're not going to believe her. I think that if you're going to stay with her, get on line and start looking up tantric, kama sutra, and stuff like that. If you know you're doing it better then you won't have to worry about her lying. You might learn something fun and new.

Answer 4

It sounds to me like there is something that she is wanting you to do, but shes a women and wont tell you what exactly it is. I was having that problem with my husband as well, then he all of a sudden started trying different things that he has never done before and now we have no problems. But, I figured out his secret. I found locked away in a bag he had a collection of Cosmopolitan magazines, and was reading the part for men, That's where he learned what he did. I am not saying this will work for everyone, but what I can tell you is whatever you know gets her off, spice it up and combine it will different things at one time. To put this in a nice way, while your in there, maybe try using your fingers at the same time. (example) But seriously, don't let her telling you that she has had better hold you back Think of it as exploring new things, and do whatever it takes to please her. Women tell men anything when they get frustrated.

Answer 5

Listen man i have had that experience before and the way i was told was much worse. But what you have to realize it is not a bad thing that you're not her best , the point is she married you because she loved you and you should be satisfied with that. Whoever was her best makes no difference to you and shouldn't because you guys share a strong bond and you are married. Forget about it and if it persists to be problem , get some sex tips but didn't let it be a problem. SHE MARRIED YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE A GREAT GUY AND YOU LOVED HER. REMEMBER THAT,SEX ISNT EVERYTHING !

Answer 6

And she told you this why???? This is the kind of information I were never lay on a spouse. Were you pushing her to supply you with information about her past? If you were you deserved the insult. In these days of almost universal promiscuity almost everyone has a past and there is absolutely NO need to share this information with a spouse.
If she just laid this on you for no apparent reason I would spend some time trying to find out why she's so angry at you. Be sure to find out what's brewing before you come home one day and find that she's moved out. Whether her problem is sexual or emotional there is something you can do to help remedy this problem.

Answer 7

Well that shoots the theory of honesty being the best policy all to hell.
You have a mean ,nasty wife. That remark had only one purpose and you just discovered what it was.
Where you go from here depends upon whether or not she can adequately explain to you her reason for saying that.
If she opts for the lame a** excuse of " Well I was just being honest "
Tell her that's what a child would say and as a man you can't be married to a child.
Good Luck

Answer 8

that is mean. tell her i know how you feel . I had better too! see how she likes that,
You guy needs counseling .
Even if it was true you never hurt someone like that.
there si so much more to sex than performance.
Tenderness romance
I feel that making love starts early.
Romance her Thur the day tease her flirt with her.It is the little things that mean so much to us.
Maybe she is mad at your or hurt and is lashing out at you. you need to evaluate what you want and where you want to go with this relationship and do make a plan of action and follow thru.
Personally if a man told me that ! I would be gone
Dont be so available.
Woo her.!
To most women you got to treat then good before you ever get us to the bedroom
Flowers dates ( do you still romance and date your woman.

Answer 9

I can see you feel self conscious about it. Try not to hold it against her. Her best was probably her first and that's common for women to think that. Go to the gentleman's club after work to get you good and teased then go home and tell her you need to see her immediately. As soon as you and her alone start making out with her like you just met and show lots of emotion while having sex.

Answer 10

Did you ask her or did she offer this bit of info? If she gets a kick out of putting you down then she is just as insecure as you are. If you asked her because you are insecure and need to be assured then you should try not to put her on the spot like that. In any case she is not the best at a lot of things either. Does this mean she should give up?