i am pregnant and want an abortion but my boyfriend does not what should we do?

Question

as of now hes not very stable finantially

Answer 1

Give the baby up for adoption. There are too many loving homes that want babies to go around killing innocent children because you couldn't use protection.

Answer 2

I am pro-choice but I have to tell you that I was in a bad situation with my third child. For about two weeks after I found out I was pregnant with him I wrestled with the idea of having an abortion. At the time I was already a single mom of 2 children, and working a seasonal job. I finally decided I would go through with the pregnancy, and if nothing changed for the better by the time I had the baby, I would put it up for adoption.
And I will tell you why I decided this. I had been a part of a therapy group a few years before that where one of the women in the group had gone and had an abortion about a year prior to the group forming. Boy, was she messed up! She was depressed, and what she was fixated on was the fact that she had killed her baby! She realized too late that deep down she really wanted the baby, but that she did not think she could afford to have it by herself.
If you feel that an abortion is right for you, then don't let your boyfriend sway you. But be prepared for this to hurt or even permanently damage your relationship with him.
If you want an abortion because you don't feel you can afford a baby right now, that's not a good enough reason. Be sure you know the actual reason you want an abortion before you do it.

Good Luck honey!

Oh! By the way! By the time I had my third baby, I had been promoted to a permanent job making three times as much money as before. My youngest son is my heart! I am SO glad I went ahead with the pregnancy!

Answer 3

you are lucky that you have a man that wants to stick around and take care of a baby. most young girls that get pregnant are abandoned by their partner or the father is the one that pushes the abortion issue. I personally dont believe in abortion for myself....but its not illegal so do whatever, but an abortion at a LEGAL clinic that is licensed to do them can cost over $500 and depending on rather there are any complications and how far along you are at the time you could have several thousand dollars worth of follow up care and perhaps hospitalization which wont be covered by any insurance. you are saying that he is not financially stable right now.....so apparently you arent very well off yourself if you are worried about his stability. I will also tell you that if he is not willing to agree to the abortion no court will hold him responsible for the cost of the procedure so you will have to come up with that cash in advance to pay for it. my advice if it were me is to carry the baby (you can get medical assistance if you cant pay for the prenatal care) once the baby is born let him raise the baby if he chooses and if not put the baby up for adoption.

Answer 4

I am pro choice so I won't preach the whole killing your baby thing to you, however I don't think you should have an abortion, There is a VERY good possibilty that you will really regret an abortion, but I have 2 kids and TRUST ME... you will NEVER regret having that baby! Noone is ever 100% ready to have a baby but once it gets here you will manage and never regret it! When you have that baby you will be so in love that you will do anything you have to to provide for it, and trust me you will find a way and it sounds like your boyfriend wants to help you which is more than alot of women have!

Answer 5

Please find a Crisis Pregnancy Center in your area (see link below). They offer free over-the-counter pregnancy tests and many offer free sonograms. They are a better alternative than "Planned Parenthood" which is a group that is financially INVESTED in making sure that you choose abortion. They are very successful at this because they purposefully hide information about your baby’s development and don’t offer sonograms so that you can see your baby. They tell you abortion is “routine” and that it is a “minor procedure”, but then when you are hurting emotionally afterwards, they tell you you’ll just “get over it”.

Did you know that most abortionists don’t even do a sonogram first to find out how far along the baby is? They just take the mother’s word for it as to how many weeks gestation she is, and they start the abortion anyway. Many women find out that they miscalculated and are further along than they thought, sometimes into the second trimester. This happened to me. I thought I was 12 weeks, but after the abortionist finished, he nonchalantly told me “sorry it took so long…your baby was a bit further along than 12 weeks.” I was so shocked that I couldn’t say anything. I couldn’t even bring myself to ask how far along the baby was. If they had done their due diligence, they should have found that out, informed me, and let me make my choice based on the facts. As it was, they just decided to go forth anyway and inform me in passing. It still sickens me to this day.

Crisis Pregnancy Centers truly offer information about ALL alternative choices for a pregnant woman, and then they back it up by actually providing FREE help with any of those alternatives; referrals to government agencies for help, as well as private non-profits and individuals who selflessly give help and support to women having a difficult time dealing with an unplanned pregnancy. After the birth, they also provide free baby clothes, formula, diapers, wipes, nursery furniture, counseling services, parenting classes, and too many other things to mention here. The women who work there are largely volunteers whose goals are to HELP women and children, not to lead them down the path of heartbreak and guilt that inevitably follows abortion. They truly care about BOTH the baby AND the mother.

God bless.

http://www.pregnancycenters.org/advantage.asp

Answer 6

I am a mother of 3 and adopting my fourth, please do not abort a child give this baby to a couple that can not have children or you could even pick the family through an agency! Really think about it because a abortion will affect you for the rest of your life! My sister had an abortion when she was 16 yrs old, now she is 46 yrs and regrets it everyday!

Answer 7

That's not a question that anyone on this site can answer for you. You need to do what is right for you.

Someone's not having money isn't enough of a reason to get an abortion; but at the same time, when boyfriends risk letting a pregnancy occur one of the risks they take is that the girl will get pregnant, and they will have no say over what happens to the pregnancy.

Somewhere in your heart you know what you want to do. Follow your heart.

Answer 8

Abortion is permanent; being financially stable is not. What's the worse that could happen? The possibility that he doesn't have a decent paying job when the baby comes? If he's the type of guy that I'm married to, he will make sure to do anything in his power to provide for this child, even if it takes 2 minimum wage jobs. If he doesn't become financially stable, you could always place the baby up for adoption.

Answer 9

You have to think about the baby in the situation. The baby is a child and sex is determined at conception so it is a living being! I am 100% against abortion.. If you REALLY don't want the baby you can always give it up for adoption.. you can even do open adoptions where you still get to see the child. But you do not need to go killing the innocent child because you decided to have sex. And also, like someone else said.. being financially stable is only temporary! Abortion is permenant!!

Answer 10

This one is difficult. I am against the loss of life. But i found myself in a situation that could have been better handled i think. I was 16 he was 19 and we found ourselves expecting. I chose life. I figured I love him and he loves me. Plus i made the deal with him and his parents that if i ever needed out for my sanity that they would all assume resposibility and not cut me out. They knew about my past situations ( childhood abuse resulting in self hate and drug use) and agreed, a child may need more than I had to give. But its 7 years later. i have a fantastic child, a husband I am still in love with, and he loves me too. I know because we have gone through alot of trouble together. But my education suffered. So I'm stuck just now going back to school.

Financially it may be hard but having a loving family for the first time was/is fantastic. And the Firsts I went through and am still experiencing are so awesome. I didn't think I was mommy material, and I still don't but I do very well just being a mother and a friend. Not the crazy let him do whatever type of friend but, a trusting lets see what happens when we try this non-overbearing type.

I vote keep it. If you truly can't cope adoption is a viable option at any age for the child. Ask yourself one question, do you feel love for your boyfriend, and now you have a child to think about. Could you enjoy a smile at three AM?

Answer 11

Natalia, just make sure you do what is best for you. Sit down and write the pros and cons of your situation. Can we afford this baby? Are we mentally stable? Am I prepared to be a single mom? Am I prepared if he wants to leave me and the baby? Do I qualify for maternity leave if not what are my options? Can I be prepared for a lot of grieving and possibility of damage for future pregnancies due to the harshness of the procedure? If I have this child will I be prepared for my whole life to change? After you have really thought of this list, make sure that no matter what anybody else wants, it is YOU that makes the decision. I was in this situation. I am due in 1 and a half weeks and I am so happy that God lead me to a this path. I know my fiancee and I will be great parents even though it is out of marriage, we were blessed and God made it possible. We are very excited for my daughter to be born and I know when I see her, I could never regret not having her.