I need some advice on how to get over a person that is a family member and has a destructive personality. After many years of trying to make the relationship work, I have decided to step away from it. However, this person consumes my thoughts. How do I move on?? I really need some constructive advice on this one. Thanks.
2007-01-28 14:18:07 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
These type of people are what I call "Toxic" people. I know from personal experience that the best thing to do is remove yourself from that relationship.... you have tried for years to make it work, and unfortunately relationships can't be one-sided... I don't know the nature of the family relationship... if its a parent then I know that feelings of guilt will come into it... but you have to think of yourself, if a relationship is ruining your life, or relationships with other people then its time to move on... adopt the attitude of a purely shallow relationship, if its a parent you can't get away from entirely. You have to decide whether there is too much water under the bridge or if the nature of the relationship has to change.
Moving on is hard to do, but its about remembering that you are a person who is worthy of respect, care and love that is not conditional the on moods or behaviours of others. Look at the other relationships in your life that are good, and concentrate on making those and others awesome... don't waste energy on relationships that are destructive... its about making sure that you are healthy mentally and emotionally.
2007-01-28 19:53:41 · answer #1 · answered by tarzanatvw 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Me tooooo!!!!
"RS" - that's beautiful - when your safely away from the destructive person ... but OMG, when you live with them, and they're purposefully getting into your face and using words to push non-existent issues so they'll have a reason to destroy things/ relationships --- well it doesn't work that well. (Sigh).
This question is facing me directly in my face, and I wish I had words of wisdom to share ... but I think that I need God to jump start my emotional heart
since my destructive person has destroyed my emotional heart.
I would suspect that a destructive personality type will self destruct, and the only wisdom I can share is GET AWAY before they destroy you in the process of destroying themselves.
2007-01-28 14:50:25 · answer #2 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgive the person in your heart and mind .. and say it "I love you, but I can't have you destroy my sanity, so I am letting you go, God be with you and be well .." in your mind everytime thoughts of this person spring up. Memorize this magic phrase and try it for a few days. Also, take up a new hobby to occupy your mind.
2007-01-28 14:24:53 · answer #3 · answered by RS 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋