Separation and loss of breath feels like an Elephant is on my chest?

Question

I am going throught hell with my husband he is selffish and inconciderate and acts like he doesnt give a F*&*. I know he does I know him too well and maybe he knows me to well he takes advandage of me because he knows Ill take it and I usually do then he says Im sorry then it happens angain same thing over and over.Im 38 and have been with him since 18 we have a 8yr old son
well today i told him im moving out with my son and put a deposit on apt.BOTTOM LINE I FEEL LIKE IM GOING TO DIE I WANT TO CRAWL IN A WHOLE. I dont know why this is killing me cause every day has been dying ...also he here and Im leaving on 2-15

GOOD LORD IM SORRY I DIDNT PROOF READ

Answer 1

I can only tell you what worked for me:
-Listen to music that lifts spirits (good ol' days kinda songs)
-Talk to people you feel comfortable with.
-Stay away from coffee, artificial sweetners, and processed sugar (they make you hyper and keep you awake longer so that you can continue thinking awful thoughts for longer... yuk!)
-Watch comedies or listen to comedians. Laughter is oh so powerful.
-Keep yourself busy with anything that doesn't remind you of him. You can trick your brain into not dwelling by keeping it focused on something else.
-Go to sleep with awesome thoughts: I think about that millionaire boyfriend that I turned down and dream about being his wife.
-VALUE YOURSELF FOR WHAT YOU'RE WORTH. You know how much that is. What he has done to you doesn't make you worth less. It makes him worth less.

Best of luck to you. I'll send you some good vibes before I go to bed tonight.

Answer 2

Having gone through a separation and divorce, I can tell you it is VERY painful. There were days I thought I was going out of my mind. But I knew it was the best thing for me in the long run. I ended up going to counseling (couldn't afford it, but couldn't afford NOT to go even worse) and was given a prescription for my anxiety, so I could make it through the day without freaking out. It helped, but time was the best healer. It took a good 6 months to get over that "what am I going to do" feeling, but I have no regrets now. I am living my own life, away from my selfish, self-centered, rude ex-husband. No more anxiety. It will get better, and you will get stronger and make it through this a happier person.

Answer 3

Lucy no apologies necessary. I've been on the receiving end of where you are at. I was the immature guy who seemed to react with my instincts instead of my brain. Nothing is a good substitute for wisdom. After the divorce i grew up quick, real quick. I ended up getting custody of the kids and this too piled up responsibilities that I had to meet. If I had to do everything all over again, I would have suggested just a separation. Not even court ordered. After a time your husband will grow up. But, it is amazing how vindictive a guy can get if you shoot for divorce. If I only had the ability to turn back time. And I'm happily married to another women. The negative impact it had on my children and my ex is the reason I would have tried to reconcile instead of going for the heart. I got the best lawyer, and we destroyed her. It was a dark day in my life.

Answer 4

A friend's mom had a couple of those symptoms (chest pain, shortness of breath with the least amount of exertion) and it turned out to be caused by the high blood pressure medication she was taking. Does your friend take any medication that could be causing a problem? Also, my son lost a lot of weight four years ago without trying to, and it was because of an enlarged spleen (which turned out to be leukemia). That will show up in his blood test, if that's the case. Another relative of mine has emphysema and those are the symptoms. I hope that in your relative's case, it is only something like needing to switch medications.

Answer 5

I can relate. You are having anxiety in a big way. My husband is selfish too. I'm 35 and have 3 kids and been with him since 17. Maybe you finally have to do for yourself....and you finally made your first step. So you feel scared and anxious. Life is short, don't waste it. You need to make yourself happy. I feel lost almost every single day. I don't have the guts to leave. I'm still trying to figure it all out, i guess I'll know when the time is right...looks like your on your way. It'll hurt at first, but you'll make it!

Answer 6

Hello,
You sould like you are very upset and going through a very hard time here... It sounds like you may need counseling and help to learn how to deal with this situation and how you are feeling. Do what you said you are doing and leave for now at least for the time being so you can get your thoughts and head back on straight and until you can get the help you need for you to deal with things. You also may be feeling depressed and feelings of hopelessness so talk to a doctor and see if they can help you with medication or something as well! Here comes lots o fhgus to you today.

Answer 7

Lucy, don't worry about the spelling noone is grading you here. I'm sorry you are going thru this but please know, I don't know you but I am very proud of you! You are doing what is best for YOU, and you deserve better. Be strong and things will work out in time. Good luck and God bless!

Answer 8

This is hard for you and you are probably having some anxiety. If this is what you truly want, it will get better with time. Just take some deep breaths and soul search. My prayers are with you.

Answer 9

It's not an easy thing to go through, my wife had an affair and left me, I gave my heart (life) to Jesus....wow....He has healed my broken heart, He loves you and wants all your burdens, so that He can counsole you, and heal you through it.....God bless ya

Answer 10

This too shall pass . . .the feeling is temporary. Just believe in yourself and you will be fine.