I love him but i am not happy with him and have not been for about three months. I just cannot seem to make a decision and i am scared to doing the wrong thing. i am starting to lose respect for him and i do not want to have sex with him and i want to be more independent. But still i do not know what to do. What if i never know? So i thought maybe i should pay my rent here for a month so bf can go on like normal and i could go flatting for a month and we could have a trial separation so i can figure out what i want. Does this seem like a good idea????? Is a trial separation too cruel? Should i just break up? And what if he breaks up with me?? What would be the sensible thing to do?
2007-01-28 13:14:50 · 6 answers · asked by darkling 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well first of all you need to consider why you are not happy with him. like, is it something that can be fixed, is it him, is it you? i think you need to evaluate all that before you can make your decision.
2007-01-28 13:19:13 · answer #1 · answered by yauh 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well,this is a tuffy.Talk to him about how you feel.I know you are nervous but you will feel better afterwords.Ask yourself what needs to be in proved and how can it be changed??Talk about your feelings and solutions.
If nothing gets better for a while after then leave.At least he is warned and aware.
If the other half is not willing to make the relationship better or at least try then ...why do you want to be with someone like that??
A relationship is not easy you have to work at it.If he is not willing to come to a solution then you deserve better.He is not ready for a relationship.
I'm not trying to sound mean but if a man wanted the relationship he would help at making both of you happy.And vice versa.
Good Luck
2007-01-28 21:35:44 · answer #2 · answered by virgo woman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A separation would be a very good idea, because it will give you the space you both need to figure out whether or not you want to be together any longer. If it's not what you both want, it won't work out anyway. It's natural to be afraid, but it would be detrimental not to do what you know you have to do.
2007-01-28 21:20:41 · answer #3 · answered by T Time 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The smart thing is to sit down and for your self only write on a piece of paper what you want. why you lost respect for him.?what more do you want from him? what was he doing that he does not do now.?Then sit down and talk this out with him. After living with him for 12 years I am surprised you did not marry.
I would not throw 12 years away. Good Luck
2007-01-28 21:29:12 · answer #4 · answered by mamayer6 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need space to figure things out. You see him for what he is not as opposed to what he is. If in time you figure out he's not the one, you shouldn't worry about what he's doing. Only what you are doing. Sometimes the right thing is the hardest thing to do.
2007-01-28 23:22:09 · answer #5 · answered by Need Answers 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i think you both need a break,and you need to figure out what you want,it's scary out there,but you can do it!
2007-01-28 21:19:21 · answer #6 · answered by kat_luvr2003 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋