Do you think there is anything wrong with me that guys don't like me?

Question

I'm 15 I'm 4'11 and I have hazel eyes and dark brown hair, I still haven't had my first kiss yet and I've asked guys out before but they always say no, no guys ever ask me out. Actually most boys in my school tease me and look at me with disgust. My mom and my grandmother always say 'don't worry about you're better than them' but it doesn't help. I still feel insignficant and like I don't even deserve to have someone that would treat me like crap. I have a 90 GPA and I'm a high school freshman. I'm a first degree black belt in karate and i'm in a lot of clubs (science, library, renisannce), i fill up my life with a lot of activities and computer time to drown out my lack of social life, my friends are the same way so we only occasionally hang out after school much. Even my mom teases me about my lack of my social life she says I spend to much time on my computer but they're is never anything else to do. Can someone please give me a real anwser about why boys don't like me?

Answer 1

Don't EVER think that there is something wrong with you. You DO have a social life, you belong to some really fun clubs and you DO get to socialize. Your mom and grandmother only see you at home, they don't know what you're like at school. I can see you're succesful, you're an active person mentally, you're smart and you've got friends who share your same interest. Most people crave friends who are like that, I'm one of them.

Boys, are just boys at 15 and they're not really mature or serious about dating or having a girlfriend. You're very advanced for your age and I would think that a lot of boys in your grade or age level really aren't mature enough for you. You might like them for how they look...but they're still just young in every aspect.

Wait until you're in college, which is in what? In 3 years? You'll start meeting guys who will be just as interested in chess, computers and whole bunch of other activities like you. In college, people really start to hang out with people who have the same interest/major. A lot of people have met their life partners in college.

So be patient. There's nothing wrong with you...highschool boys are not yet ready for you...but...WATCH OUT COLLEGE GUYS, here comes oxiate!

Answer 2

You are still very young, so I would not worry about not having your first kiss yet. There are tons of kids that are 15 who have never been kissed. Those early relationships are never very good anyway. If you wrote down every girl you knew in your grade and if they had a boyfriend or not you would see most do not.

You should look around in your clubs or karate and see if there is a boy you like. If there is, don't just go up and ask him out, just start talking more. Try to be more social in the club. Try not to be on the defense. Make eye contact and smile. Then after a while, ask your mom if you can have a couple kids over to watch a movie one night. When the time is right, everything will fall into place and you will have a nice boy that appreciates who you are.

There is probably nothing wrong with you! Just don't lose hope and stay true to yourself.

Answer 3

Sorry, I don't know but I believe kids your age and especially guys go for looks. Personality- being happy and fun (the most popular girl in my highschool was not pretty, was overweight but was such a joy). But I'd like to tell you what I've learned with time. I wasn't kissed until I was 17 and didn't have a true boyfriend until I was 19. I also felt bad, in fact terrible, I thought I was ugly. I beat on myself. I'm sure that probably showed through because I was so insecure and, well, that's a turnoff not only for boys but people. It was so important to me to be liked by a boy that it was the most important thing, it's all I thought about, even throughout my later years. I didn't go for a career and a good job and only cared about love, trying to find the right guy. Well, I had tons of bad dates and did a lot of stupid things for guys and even accepted some that didn't treat me that great and even didn't like too much and it wasn't worth it. The key is self esteem. I realize now that I should've gone for a career, so as to be financially independent. My self esteem improved as I got older and finally understood that having a guy is NOT the most important thing. I mean now I don't have much when I could've been concentrating on me, on doing things, enjoying life and friends. I am married now but that's what I went through. You have to build your life and the boy will come along some time. It is not important what others think about you. I hope you can learn this way before I did.

Answer 4

I honestly can't tell you. It seems to me like you're a great girl! My friend from highschool was a lot like you (from how you describe yourself) and she didn't really have a boyfriend until we were 18 or 19. You still have many years ahead of you and I guarantee that you will have a relationship when the time is right! You said that you are active in clubs which is great. Maybe just cut out a little bit of your computer time and join another club. Join a club that requires you to do a lot of socializing. Maybe try giving something totally new to you a chance, you might end up loving it!
As I said though you sound like a great girl and I'm sure there is nothing wrong with you so just be patient!
Good Luck!

Answer 5

I think it is because of your lack of social abilities. No offense, but I too am in a lot of clubs for school and I sometimes feel like a social outcast even though I'm quite the opposite. Try letting up on some of the clubs and give yourself some time to relax every once and a while. If your mom dissapproves just speak your mind and tell her how you feel. I mean doesn't no free time stress you out? Well hope that helps!

Answer 6

No, nothing is wrong. Me and my girlfriend didnt fall in love or kiss till Junoir year. I had dated other girls for popularity and such, but didnt do anything much more than a hug. My girlfriend went out with one guy briefly before me, but mostly it was to one dance.

Mainly what I'm trying to say is dont force anything, all that will happen is you getting hurt. Also if the guy is giving you bad vibes, break up with him.

Me and my girlfriend, didnt kiss till 6 months into dating, and by then we were pretty sure about eachother.

Also just to boast, I would like to say me and her plan to marry soon. I'm 19, she's 18. We plan to marry in a few years, around when I'm 22 ish. Only reason we arent right now is because of college, me going into the airforce, and finances.

Just saying I'm sure that you can wait and eventually you can find a guy that respects you.

Answer 7

Cheer up gal, it's still too early to judge about things like this. Filling up your time with lots of programs is a good solution to passing time, but have you opened up your heart to allow others to come into your life?

Have you been sitting around with a stern face giving everyone the looks? Sometimes, the key to opening up your heart, lies in a simple thing called a smile. Trying smiling more to allow others to know that you are not as inapproachable as you may look. Look out for common topics to start a conversation with. Most of all, enjoy the process of making friends.

Not having friends does not mean you're cool, and having lots doesn't make you popular either. It's not a matter of quantity, it's a matter of quality. Make best friends, best of buddies and best pals and not settle into the in crowd. Cause true friends are always there in times of need, while "friends" will always desert you in times of trouble.

Answer 8

Don't be in such a rush to have the first kiss or get a boyfriend. That will take care of itself. Every day, people who aren't trying to get into a relationship find the one they were hoping for. Just be yourself, stay positive, and don't be afraid to meet new people at school, church, or whatever. You're only 15. There is still so much ahead of you.

Boys your age these days are into their Nintendo Wii and their Xbox 360, not necessarily girls. Wait for them to mature a little before freaking out. ;)

Answer 9

Do you intimidate them? I do not see a link to see your picture which will help a lot of answers. You may be good a lots of things but just lack the self confidence in the you really are a good looking girl part. This shows. Be yourself and speak your mind. Know (not think) that you are pretty and better than any one else in your own way. Figure out how to get your confidence up in this part of your life.

Answer 10

There's gotta be someone out there who likes you. I think increasing your social life would making finding a boyfriend easier. It puts you out there more. Don't worry about your first kiss. Did you know that some teenagers don't have their first kiss until they graduate from high school? That OK though. You should never rush anything. Just enjoy your life and live in the moment.