My husband is 14 yrs older than me and i am 24 going on 25.When we met he was my bosses boss and we still work for the same company.Aside from a few strange moments because his daughter is only 8 yrs younger than me and his brother is my age we are fine and love each other.We have been married almost a year now.Problem is his smoking 6 packs of cigeretts a day at least this has been going on before we met but he tries to hide it?Yesterday evening he had a heart attack and while at the hospital we learned he has lung cancer!Why wont my hubby talk to me about this?I mean he actually asked me to by some cigeretts for him to sneak in!And seems to want to throw himself back into his work and social life?
2007-01-28 05:32:14 · 6 answers · asked by Melrose G 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am very concerned the doctor says if he keeps this up he will be dead by the time he is 45!When i brought this up to him he said not to worry i am in his will and he has life insurance!
2007-01-28 05:38:15 · update #1
Rita tarder honestly you must be dumb you think i could be home to get clothing and take a shower ?
2007-01-28 05:40:09 · update #2
Sorry, to hear of your situation. Your husband may need some alone time. He may be in denial or shock. Give him some room and he will come around.
2007-01-28 05:38:09 · answer #1 · answered by honiebyrd 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, when people have serious medical issue you cling to those around you.
So there are only 2 ways to go. He may see you as to young to handle anything and have no real regard for you. You might just be the little chickie that he married.
BUT.......... he might be like a lot of guys who don't want to face their mortality. He may feel that being older than you if he starts having medical issues you may start to see him as old and he may lose you. He is only what 40? He might be really scared because anybody would. And he just found this out? It might take him a bit of time to process all of this.
The continuing to smoke thing? You need to sit down and talk about this. No bull, no nothing as you are his wife and if he truly loves you he will. Tell him that you are there for him no matter what. But he will of course have to quit smoking for him and you. If he does you need to talk about life insurance, the house, what to do if something happens, whatever.
2007-01-28 13:50:09 · answer #2 · answered by jackson 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sweety what is there to talk about. he has lung cancer and he just had a heart attack. what more is there to say about his health. there's no way to reverse what has happened but just try to move forward from here. I think you should try getting him some help and he has to quit smoking because this definitly isn't helping. get him some help and put him a healthy diet. if he doesn't change some things in his life his future is going to be cut short and thats probably why he's not talking to you because he knows that. Its probably just hard for him to quit. Good Luck :0
2007-01-28 13:41:04 · answer #3 · answered by step b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably in shock and in denial and needs some time to let things sink in, which would explain why he wont yet talk with you about it. Let him bring the subject up when he's ready. He's also addicted to cigarettes, and addiction is hard to break. Don't harp on him about it. He will only hide from you. He will quit if/when he's ready. Acknowledge that you can't change him. You can tell him that you care and you'd be devastated to lose him, but ultimately, he has to make the decision to quit, and it's a tough one to make and follow through on. However, you don't have to contribute to his smoking by buying him cigarettes and delivering them to him.
2007-01-28 13:42:52 · answer #4 · answered by Laura Renee 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are suck a liar.
If you were married and your husband had a heart attack "yesterday evening" you'd be at the hospital.
2007-01-28 13:36:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Maybe he doesn't want you to worry about him.
2007-01-28 13:36:17 · answer #6 · answered by waxingtheturtle2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋