Im facing a mental crisis about growing up!!! (especially 14 yrs/18+ please read!!)?

Question

I am fourteen years old. Ever since I was in first grade I have always been very mature and VERY eager to grow up. Everyone called me mature. I've been extremely mature for the last two years and suddenly , this summer when I was 13 and a half I sorta cracked. I hate growing up now ...its so freaky and I seriously feel so overwhelmed that I'm gonna be an adult in four years!!!!!!! I mean I've always been a kid and I still feel like a kid....This is so weird, I might not be making any sense so please just try to understand. Another thing is that I have always looked at an age that is a few years older as old but when I get to it , It doesnt feel old at all. Now that I'm fourteen I feel that fourteen is a big age , but I still feel small-So i'd like to know: is fourteen a big age, or is it just a mentality that I had when I was eleven that hasnt changed? I still feel like an eleven year old- this could be because I moved to a different country when I was eleven and I hate it so much

...n I havent moved on since then. This year after I hit the spot where suddenly stopped feelin eager to grow up I've just become so crazy about proving that Im still a kid and adulthood is a long way away for me...so is it?? Im trying to find frens that like to play games and watch cartoons and I get so pi**ed at my friens when they talk about guys and make up (even though Im the one that got them into it!) I kno tht this is not normal. Ppl normaly stop wntin to get older at like 27 and start having a crisis when theyre 45! Evrybdy else my age is tryin to grow up really fast.

A quest. for 18+'s= Was the time from when you were 14 to now a long time or a short time. Do u guys (18 year olds) still feel lyk kids?? Is 18 a long way 4 me?
Othr quests: Wat can i do abt my depression? m i still a kid? Are ther anyother 14 yr olds who are experiencin the same as me (or still lyk to do kids stuf)? Please email me if u r [e-mail], n hw do I move on n feel pos. abt grwn up

Answer 1

Don't worry! As you enter puberty there are many chemical changes going on in your body. These chemical changes can heavily effect emotions. Even your brain is restructuring and growning. In addition, adolesence is a confusing time, since there really is no clear answer as to when you become an adult (at least in European and Western cultures). Is it when you turn 16 and can drive a car? Is it at 18 or 21?

I too had always felt more mature and was told so by other as a child. But as I entered my late teens I wondered if it was true. I felt mature in some areas of my life, but not in others.

Now in my 20s, I feel as though I'm back on track. All you can do is keep on living, growing, and discovering who you are. Don't force yourself to grow up too quickly...since you can never get it back. Have fun, and believe me when I say everything will work out in the end. It did for me!

Answer 2

I'm 30 now, and I know what you mean. I often feel that I am still in my young 20s, then realize that was a long time ago. I think part of it is the idea that you'll feel older. Really you don't, you just kind of feel like yourself. One thing I can say is don't be in a rush to grow up, you'll get there. Also, don't worry about growing older, just enjoy the moment. It takes some practice, but can be done. Finally, 18 is not old, and if you can make your way into college, especially if you live in a dorm, you can push off being an adult for another 4 or 5 years (LOL).
Also like you I always though 18 was so old when I was 14. When I was 20 I thought I was a grown man. Now I look at 20 year olds and they look like little kids. So it is all about point of view. Hope that makes sense and helps. Good luck.

Answer 3

Your mum shouldn't be that way but if she is you have your dad he handled it Alto better then my dad did when i first got pregnant, if your certain you want to do this then go for it but please think before you do, i know you say your in love and i believe you are even though your young you still know ignore the people who say OH ur to young to know what love is, their stupid of course you do, but having a baby puts so much strain on a relationship honestly iv been with my boyfriend 3 years nearly now and we argue constantly because our baby is very sleepless hes 3 weeks old now, im 18 and hes 19 nearly 20, loads people can help you out, sure start centres if there is any near you, benefits im sure threes some so you can afford pram etc. it is so hard though, i had a very hard pregnancy got a water infection everything that could go wrong at end i was in labour for 14 hours, but if abortion and adoption isn't an option then good luck to you you`ll be ok, also being pregnant can make you VERY emotional and angry sometimes so warn your boyfriend its not you stressing its being pregnant lol, baby advice, just take time to chill out once in a while you dint constantly have to be at your baby's side when he or she is born, i dint mean leave the house but just go into another room lie down for a while obviously leave baby with family or something, also sleep when baby sleeps and ignore people who say oh your not pregnant because the way u think ur pregnant is how i thought i was and i now have my 3week old so yes it can happen with Pre *** (what happens when they pull out before) you didn't make a horrible choice everyone makes mistakes but ul be so proud when he or she is here :) xx

Answer 4

I felt EXACTLY the same way t 14. Was I a young adult? Still a kid?

Guess what..... I discovered the answer.
Keep doing what you enoy doing. DOn't let any doubts creep in that you are too old. If you enjoy it, you are not too old.

When you stop enjoying something, you have then outgrown it, but not before. Think about what you liked to do when you were five...say your favourite t.v. show. Still your best show?

If not, that means you naturally outgrew it.

When i was 14 I mourned not being able to run on the field and ask sportstars for thier autographs...but i did it until i just thought I didn't enjoy it, anymore....at that point, I was too old.

And there are some things you ALWAYS love doing and you can stay a kid forever, with those things!

AND the gap between adults anhd kids has really reduced with adults staying kids for way longer!

Answer 5

I think I know what you are going through I mean I am nineteen, and still feel like I did when I went to camp a few summers back when Nancy like the other CLT's told me that "for someone who's about to be sixteen you don't seem very mature." That made me feel bad about myself, and I still sometimes feel that way as a result. But you know what that is just me I am not as mature as them,and even in high school I felt like my peers were more mature then me, but that's just me. So don't be in such a rush to grow up, and just grow up on your own terms, but remember that does not mean you do not have to make an effort to grow up. Make an effort to grow up, and finally you will get the hang of this whole growing up thing, and I must tell you I am still just as scared as you are, but do not worry you will get it, and eventually blossom into a beautiful young woman inside, and out. But for now enjoy your teen years, have a fun ,and work hard you will go far in life. Peace to you babe as you ride on the roller coaster of life.

Answer 6

This is interesting.
I find that almost all kids wanna be older, then when adulthood hits, its a shock. The reality of it seems to have hit you pretty early. Unfortunately, there isnt much you can do about it.
You are still a child. All you can do is try and enjoy being a child. Adulthood and responsibility will come soon enough. You cant worry so much about it. How fun can your life now if you always worry about whats coming?

Answer 7

Hello, I'm Jaquonda E
I kind of understand you situation and sometime want to be older then im really is, but all things will change when you hit 18+ because when you hit that age your going to wish you where 14, 15,16, etc.

Because when you hit that age (18 and up) then you have to get
a car
apartment
job
college
tuition
bills and bills
Then you will wish that you were young and without a care in the world.
Not trying to scare you ,but I'm 19 years old and i wish i was 14 again.
NO JOKE AT ALL

While you are young just HAVE ALOT OF FUN!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WITHOUT DRUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 8

You are at a difficult age and a lot of your peers will be feeling the same way. Just try to remember that there are a lot of hormones in your body and chemical changes happening. Also the media is having subliminal effect on you.

Try and listen to the positive advise your parents give you, be sensible, study hard and you will look back on this one day and realise it was just teenage angst. I have been there!

Answer 9

I am 42 years old and still a kid.It sure helps make life easier.Stay young at heart.This will really help you as you grow older.People seem to like it also.They call me crazy,but sure love to be around me.Any age is a big age.Life can be so great,you just make the best of it.You already have a good positive attitude.You`ll do just fine i think.

Answer 10

The thought that a few years older than you are is old is completely normal. that's nothing to worry about.
As you get older, the number of years between your age and your preceived old age will increase. Meanwhile, is there a counsellor or someone at school you can talk to. Its nice to have someone you can trust when you have things like this to work out.
Try meeting with your counsellor.