i am a black african woman.my problem is i know my husband is having an affair but when i asked him if it is true he says i must nottalk like that or else he will divorceme but i know hes having an affair with his secretary and rents a house for her i have 3 kids with him how do i get out of this situation or i should i confront him
2007-01-27 23:41:13 · 13 answers · asked by chiko 2 in Health ➔ Men's Health
Hire some one to follow him
2007-01-27 23:44:50 · answer #1 · answered by battla4life p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're absolutely sure that he is with another woman, you should start looking for a job, and when you do get one, divorce him. But if you're not actually planning on leaving him, what's the point of it all? If you really know it's true, why would you confront him? Unless you don't for sure. If he threatens you with divorce when you bring that subject up, if he gets defensive to the point where he's saying something like that, he must be trying to hide something really bad.
you should try listening to "I'm not gon cry" by Whitney Houston, I think. He cheated on her with a secretary too. In the song at least.
2007-01-27 23:54:31 · answer #2 · answered by maya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should get yourself together, become more independent, (if you are not) take some classess that would lead you to make decent money to help take care of your kids/home.
(if you don't already).
Take care of your health. Exercise, exercise, exercise, and eat right so you maybe better able to handle this when it all floats on top.
If you feel you can't take this, find a way to get some real proof on his affair. Then decide how you want to deal with this, I would do it in that order so when you do decide, you will be close to the top.
this is such a hard thing, I have been through this before but I was not married (I was in a long term relationship).
It is devastating, and so hurtful. When my proof came, he left and I never called him, refused to take his calls and began working on myself. At the time we had just my son, and I arranged for a family member to be home when he picked him up. I also left him a message that if he needed to discuss any matters, my son, business, he could just leave me a message and I would get back to him. He very soon came around, calling, being so sorry and worked very hard to get me to forgive him (it took a long time for me) but I did and we got married and had another child. I forgave him but it takes so much of you to do it but once I had myself in order, that was how I was able to decide what to do. Good Luck and keep your head up, take care of you, you will be better able to take care of your kids.
2007-01-28 00:23:30 · answer #3 · answered by Ms. Kgm 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Race is not an issue.
Twice you said you know your husband is having an affair.
You said he rents a house for the other woman.
Unless there is any doubt in your mind about the above, contact a divorce lawyer. Your husband has no grounds to divorce you but you certainly have grounds to divorce him - do it. Maybe he will have to give up the house he rents in order to pay support. If he is sleeping around you need to be concerned about STD's also.
2007-01-28 04:16:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
man can had an affair as mistake and u may forgive him or not, but to rent a house for his Secretary to meet her to have an affair,u should let him to to hell
2007-01-28 01:59:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have an affair too. And then get divorced. And then marry whoever you're having an affair with. And then get a puppy. And name him Bob.
2007-01-28 01:18:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a sick pig if he is. But he may not be having one. you have to ask yourself, is he really or am I being a little stupid. But if he is and you really know he is. Simply catch him and make your chilren hate him for a period of time. He will understand what he was doing was wrong and never do it again. That son of a *****.
2007-01-28 02:33:56 · answer #7 · answered by Sara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you did confront him and he lied to you.....follow him and find out where she lives...take pictures....make copies of his bank statements.....start hiding some of your money...get all the proof you can of what he is spending on her and how much money he makes etc....also, once you have the address of the apartment, you can call the owner and find out whose name is on the lease...if it is his name, then you have him....call a lawyer and get a divorce...good luck
2007-01-27 23:51:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to that show Cheaters. They will have him followed, but it sounds like he's alreay cheating and lying to you.
2007-01-28 00:28:45 · answer #9 · answered by Boo Boo Head 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Serious question? What does it matter what your race is to ask a question unless it is pertinent to your answer?
2007-01-27 23:46:57 · answer #10 · answered by adriannamarie19 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋