My friend cant stop being mad at her self for marrying the guy she did. She had signs that he was not committed but she gave him benefit of doubt and went ahead and married him. He is cheating on her after marriage. She is soooooo mad at herself for putting her self in this mess. How do you get over something like that? I don't know how to help her.
Divorce is the answer but its not easy in her culture to end marriage n get divorce. No one will believe her he is cheating and will want evidence.
2007-01-27 13:45:40 · 7 answers · asked by Sense 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She needs to stop being mad at herself for loving someone. When you love someone you look over things even when you know you shouldn't, You keep hoping that they will change and maybe you even want to believe that it isn't happening. What she needs to do is deal with the situation at hand and that is his infidelity. You as a friend need to ask her what does she want to do divorce or make her marriage work. If she wants to get rid of him help her to find the evidence that she needs to end her marriage and if she wants to continue to in this relationship then encourage her to speak with her husband and seek therapy .
What ever your friend decides be there to support her and give her a shoulder to lean.
2007-01-27 14:04:31 · answer #1 · answered by regina g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she can get proof that he is cheating that would be wonderful. If not, she needs to think about herself, and let the culture deal with it, and she needs to get a divorce.
If she is mad at herself now for marrying him, she will really be mad at herself years from now, when she waste so many years of her life, with him.
Encourage her and lift her up, tell her we all make mistakes, and she was doing what she thought was right and good at the time..she doesnt need to be so hard on herself..
She needs to divorce him regardless, of what people think and say...those other people, dont have to live her life and go through what she has to go through everyday.
Just by leaving him, and her starting her life over, and being happy, this will build her self esteem back up..
Just keep supporting her, and letting her know, that she did nothing wrong...she did what she thought was right at the time.
Its ok....She needs to be happy, and she needs to do whatever will make her happy..
2007-01-27 22:06:57 · answer #2 · answered by ~Annette~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be the friend to her that you need to be.... Have her seek help and counseling for her and for her marriage... She also needs to talk with her husband and see if he still wants the marriage or not and she needs to ask him to stop cheating and if he does not then she needs to leave and separate from him... If she does have to leave him maybe you could let her stay with you if she cannot afford to get her own place right away. You will also have to help her get the evidence that she needs like pictures and things like that. I wish you the best.
2007-01-27 22:01:17 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well your girlfriend needs to do what she should have done from the beginning!! Put herself first!! She needs to love herself and understand that she is better than what he has done!! That him cheating has nothing to do with the women that she is!! She needds to leave her husband if she can't stay with him inspite of her culture. She will need a good friend to help her through it!! She may find the meaning of true frinedship and the love for herself and the strength and courage she has to move on with her life and find the peace that she needs!! She needs to forgive herself!!
2007-01-27 21:55:28 · answer #4 · answered by sexychocolatecity21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to get proof of his cheating.
2007-01-27 21:50:00 · answer #5 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she should have someone get the evidence.
2007-01-27 21:50:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
We have choices....God is always there and willing to help.....all u have to do is invite Jesus into your heart.....He loves you
2007-01-27 21:52:18 · answer #7 · answered by Bert 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋