I am having lot of arguments and ego clashes with my girl of late. We joined a software company some 4 months back and its since then that we are together. The latest argument being something like this : It so happened that some guys in my branch were planning an outing since a month and she was an active participant in that. She dint ask me even once wether I want to join and took me for granted. Finally other people in the organizing commity asked me and I refused since I was expecting a discussion with her on this. Till the last day she dint ask me and despite knowing that I was not coming, she decided to carry on. I was pretty hurt coz of this "negligence" on her part . This led to an argument and she walked out of the trip on the last day. Her stance on this issue was that Since I said no to others, I made myself pretty clear that I was not intrested to come and no amount of persuasion from her part cud have helped. What went wrong ? How cud such situations be avoided ?
2007-01-27 02:47:41 · 8 answers · asked by aries_18_mum 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Both of you need to take a deep breath and stand back and look at the bigger picture here. In all relationships there has to be give and take.
She felt she knew you well enough that she assumed, which by the way, means "make an'***' out of 'u' and 'me', that you would enjoy the trip, therefore did not think to ask you if you wanted to come, you were already coming in her mind. You on the other hand were hurt by not being invited.
Set the egos aside, apologise to each other and talk to each other about decisions such as this in the future. Resolve this if you really care about each other and want this to work.
She sounds a little impulsive, which is great, spur of the moment brings excitement to life. You sound rather serious and thoughtful about decisions, which is also good, it brings balance and careful thought to life. This could be a really good mixture for both of you, your seriousness could keep her feet on the ground (or at least an inch or two above it), and her impulsiveness adds excitement and gives you the chance to be a little more impulsive with the arrangement of your life.
Love compensates for a lot of our foibles and this could be one of the times when a private, quiet explaining talk could benefit both of you.
2007-01-27 03:03:21 · answer #1 · answered by housemouse62451 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mate it is a hard one but maybe she just wanted to fill like she could make a big decision and you would back her i know from expereance it is hard to back a partner when you think something is a bad idea but sometime it must be done to make them feel like you soreport them and if it paid off for you's than you would off been over the moon but i now it is a risk and money is a big thing for just about everyone but if you don't show your partner sureport then i think even i would walk out on ya so i would say have a talk say your sorry and see what you's can do to get over this it will be hard but both party's will have to give in one way or another.
2007-01-27 10:57:58 · answer #2 · answered by princess_gothkitten 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is the key to your problem and will continue to be if you don't learn how. First you could ask her if you could join.
Say, "Honey, that outing sounds like fun, would you mind if I go with you?" When the other people asked you to join you should have refused by saying to them," I would like to join but I'm waiting for my girlfriend to ask me." Also after they asked you, you could have approached you girl friend and said, "I've been asked to join the outing, do you mind if we went together?". This may put her on the spot and you will learn more about her from her answer. Good luck guy .
2007-01-27 11:07:06 · answer #3 · answered by Putz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have a right to get real MAD!!!being in a relationship means you share the details esc those that will affect eac of you in the tiniest ways like emotionally. She should decide whether she prefers to be independent or with you. Being in the same company she culd have asked in passing. You have to revenge this and let her feel the way you do. Then yu will be on the same page and be able to discuss it like adults. Otherrwise if you get mad when she gets back she will just insult you.
2007-01-27 10:52:48 · answer #4 · answered by cynnie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit being a whiner and clinger. If you wanted to go then go, don't whine when she doesn't ask you and if you are only going because she is then stop clinging on to her 24/7. You can love someone and still do your own thing once in awhile. With this behavior you will lose her for sure.
2007-01-27 10:56:24 · answer #5 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I guess from this perspective she's not very interested in what you're thinking right now. It seems that she wants to know other people and spend time with them which isn't completely bad. Just give'er some space and make yourself really desirable!! (; In that part i can't help u!Good Luck
2007-01-27 10:54:21 · answer #6 · answered by Little*Monkee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
break up with her duu! u 2 sound like a BAD couple, thats all i have to say
2007-01-27 10:52:31 · answer #7 · answered by monkeyluver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she didn't invite you she probably didn't want you to go. It sounds like you two need to really talk.
2007-01-27 10:51:42 · answer #8 · answered by true blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋