In spite of years of efforts, talking, therapy, begging, visits to the doctor for hormone level checks, and all the attention she could hope for, my wife only will give up sex for me, at best, 3 times a month. I am made to feel like she is doing me some huge favor and I am unreasonable in asking for anything more than her telling me to "hurry up" and "don't waste time trying to make me come".
We used to be a 10 times a week and orgasms-a-plenty couple. She isn't cheating on me. I have checked up very thoroughly on her.
We find ourselves at this point: she has pretty much lost all interest in sex and has no interest in trying to bring it back. She also finds it offensive if I get off on internet porn or even "take care of myself" in the shower. She will try and catch me in the act and yell at me.
I love her in every other way. Our kids are 14&15. I don't want to leave her but my choices are: cheat, divorce, or be miserable forever.
Which one??? She says I just need to "deal"
2007-01-27 02:24:16 · 5 answers · asked by SuperDude 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think all of us men have heard the same crap from our wives from time to time.
The only thing that might work is buying this book...
The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura Schlessinger.
I know it sounds bad, but you have to read it to believe it. She has help many marriages that are going through the same thing you are. And best of all, she believes that husbands deserve care and respect from their wives. Which all husbands know is something that is almost unheard of these days. The book is very well thought out and addresses almost every major issue we have with our wives, especially sexual issues. You can check it out at amazon.com. There is also a second book, but I am still waiting for my copy before I will know if it is as good or not.
Please try this book out. It may really help, especially if you can get her to read it.
2007-01-27 03:05:32 · answer #1 · answered by A dad & a teacher 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is there a worse thing that could have happened in this world? Merry ***** Xmas?
My wife has told me she doesn't love me anymore. She says she hasn't for years she has just been trying to be a good wife.
We met 12 years ago and married in 99. She had two tiny kids who I have raised as my own. I married her and did not father any children to take care of her and hers. I helped her get through school and get a great career from a poor single mother to a 2600 sqft house.
I had no idea until recently. A year ago she told me I needed to show her I loved her more. Ever since I have done things like love u emails, flowers left in her car, presents at work etc. I have never EVER cheated on her in any way.
She wants me to stay for the now teenage kids and she likes having sex with me. I am her f-buddy and financial partner now. She swears she never cheated and I believe her. She says I did nothing wrong and was a perfect husband.
My heart is in shreds. I can barely go out in public without crying or even vomiting.
Why would she do this to me?
You posted this at christmas and you said that you was her F*** buddy so why are you cryin now sayin she won't give you any????You also said that she likes having sex with you????? Just need a little attention..huh???
2007-01-27 12:37:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hard situation.
I don't know that any of us have the answer. You should be talking to your wife about it.
Your choices are; Cheat, divorce, misery, masturbation, communication and/or compromise.
"Deal"? Okay. Make a deal. Tell her to stay out of your personal shower time, you'll drop the porn and she'll not be bothered about sex anymore.
I imagine there's a lot more to this than you're able to tell us. I mean, you are raising 2 teenagers!
I raised one. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. It's not usually a happy, fun, time and it's give, give, GIVE all the time!
Good luck. If you want it to work, you'll find a way. Marriage is hard work. Don't break up your marriage and split your family for sex. Divorce is hell. For the kids, it never ends.
I wish you luck. Keep trying.
2007-01-27 12:08:53 · answer #3 · answered by M C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Catch you in the act and yell at you? That isn't very nice of a wife. My opinion is if she doesn't want to do it, what does she care what you are doing BY YOURSELF-you have needs too. I wouldn't cheat-just my opinion.Do you take her out, try to wine and dine her a little??-take the kids to grandmas or go spend the night somewhere away from home?You need a jump start somehow! Good Luck!
2007-01-27 10:55:42 · answer #4 · answered by Pesty Wadoo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well she can get the female form of viagra i don't rember the name but there are pills to make her want to have sex so get em or leave her
2007-01-27 11:08:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋