she told me that she can not have a baby without a husband but i do not love her but i love the kid, she told me that she will buy som pill. what i must do
2007-01-26 23:27:46 · 16 answers · asked by vicente 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I think you should ask her to marry you , as soon as you can and try to find a job to support your family.Perhaps she is proud and she feels that she is not precious to you .According to the bible she must keep her baby, no matter what you do..She can find a father for the baby ,easyly...
If you don't mind why did you sleep with her if you don't love her?These boys who sleep with girls and don't love them ,and look for , ..I don't know what princess to appear are a problem to our lives...
I shall tell you a short story. I and my husband met when we were students I -in language and literatures , he -in Law. I was 19 , he was 20.
He wanted to sleep with me, I rejected him.After 2-3 years he asked me to be his girlfriend because he said he wanted to marry me .He didn't ask if I love him.I think the boys are not interested if the girls love them.It is important that they want the girls to be theirs , for them-this is important.
Well I acceped , I became pregnat , he said nothing not for...not against, a had to do the abortion .I had a good family, but not very rich , his parents were living at countryside, we couldn't marry ,because we were lacking a lot of things..a house etc.Then I wanted to leave him, but he did't agree..I felt he was after a woman from his office , a woman that was sleeping around but they didn't succed to sleep together...I fell in love with a student from Arts ...from fashion and design section. Just because he was interested in whorses...That boy from Arts and design , also liked me, actualy I fell in love with him because the way he looked at me and talked to me. But he was faithfull to God and gave up to be... after me because I was having a boyfriend ...which is my husband , now.
I became pregnat again because I wanted to..I had the impression that I won't be pregnat again...and I did it..I kept the baby , we married because we had ..because of the child...You see.First he asked me to be his girlfriend and his wife after a couple of years because I was maybe the only girl that rejected him.He realised that I am intelligent and to me ..sleeping with a man is not a big deal...and I didn't use to sleep around..I was virgin..Nowadays ...my husband cheated on me at least twice , but ...because sometimes I ..don't want to alure him, because he is not a saint..and I saw ..a man ...a small saint...that boy....
So it results we fight ...I have to be the most beautiful and to prove it ,I have to be the most intelligent and prove it ...He has nothing to prove..it is enough that he has a lot of money today ...because he is doing bussiness...and there are women after him , because he is attractive , and rich...And at home...I am called''stupid.'', after giving up..to a nice man (the boy from Art design and fashion)just to be with him , and faithfull, although he(my husband)used to be interested in whores...somehow...But still my husband is very jealous...because he knows I am clever and beautiful to some men...
So, I think that God decided for you. You have a baby..You must marry your girlfriend , this was your destiny even from the begining ..Nobody can sleep without having a baby..because God did it so..
If you don't marry her , you do an injustice to her..and God shall see it. You have to do more then this , you have to love her becaused you sleeped with her and she was your girlfriend , not a prostitute..You must love her the way you love yourself, your own person...iF YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY...otherwise you maybe you shall merry to a woman that sleeps with your friends ...and you will have the impresion that you love her...that you are going to die for her ...although she doesn't deserve...and if somebody doesn't deserve to be loved , musn't be loved...
2007-01-28 03:22:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really do understand the frustration of this situation. I,even though you are both of age, would (if you can)consult your own Mom. I think another thing you could do is to ask her parents to please sit down and talk about this.(your Mom could also be present) Then another thing is to talk to your girlfriend alone! Tell her that you and her are having a baby not her and her Mom. That you do understand that this is exciting for all involved, it should be you and her talking things out and making the decisions. And the last thing I would say is ,DO YOU have Any intentions and what are they?marriage?living together?supporting, you, her ,and child? This can and does happen to alot of people. From the beginning it all has to be hashed out or this problem will continue.I would at all costs TRY to get along better with her parents,especially now! If you think that you are in the picture cause you are the father you may be in for a shock!Her mom seems like she can do alot of persuading!If this happens and you are pushed out of the pregnancy picture you better get ready to fight a BIG battle with mommy in law after the baby is born! I personally hope and wish you well. I hope for you that it (you) clear it up right away. her parents may be waiting for you to step up yo the plate(so to speak)!
2016-05-24 04:55:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing is you should ask yourself. You can't take both in this case. You should give up one or the other. Marry her (which you must give up your mind of not loving her) and get the baby you love or Give up your baby and you are off the hook from marrying someone you do not love.
Second, how many months is her pregnancy? in some cases, it's safer to go to the clinic to do abortion than buy some pills for abortions. I do not recommond abortion. It can harm your girlfriend. Some women may not every get pregnant again because of misusing pills and unsafe abortion. Try to explain to her. In the future, when she marries with the one who loves her and loves to get kids, it will be a problem for her if she can't get pregnant again. so, try to explain to her about the advantage and disadvatages. Also you should take responsibilties of your own for her and for the baby's sake morally. so, try to think the best way for you, baby and her safety as well as future for 2 or 3 of you.
2007-01-27 01:46:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Roe Vs Wade says she can abort the child and you can do nothing to stop her. However, it sounds like she would be willing to keep the child if you marry her. I think the both of you would be better off without the other. You do not love her, neither of you were mature enough to use contraception, and she may be using the pregnancy to trap you into marriage. Break of your relationship and let her make her decision as allowed by the law. Then go find a girl you can love, get married, then make babies.
2007-01-27 17:01:27 · answer #4 · answered by forgivebutdonotforget911 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can fully understand your girlfriend I am in that situation but I still opted to keep the baby. My baby daddy is trying so hard to be there, you should have a talk with her and discuss it like adults... Do not fight and tell her that once the baby is here both of you will take care of the baby just not as a married couple. But remember ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!!! Show what you are saying do not say something and not show ineterest that will only make her feel bad... Believe me!!!
I agree completely with Flyer!!!
2007-01-27 01:15:09 · answer #5 · answered by Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry but i would say SHE'S STUPID! never met a girl who dont like a baby. she must have think the outcome before having sex with you. just stay on her side until the baby come. promise to marry her after the baby come out just to make sure she'll give birth the baby.you can take care of the baby then if she donnot want. i think she'll never be a good mother and wife too because she cant raise a child without a husband. she's not responsible enough to think that she made a choice of getting pregnant.
2007-01-27 00:51:47 · answer #6 · answered by mar 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ahh sounds like my situation. Although I knew that once I was pregant there is no pill I can take to get ride of the baby. Tell your girlfriend theres no pill, only option is abortion, keep it, adoption, miscarriage. Anyways I got pregant and my bf was really happy and I was real sad and crying. Its not that I minded being pregant, but I minded being pregnant and not married. I had a very religious upbringing, and although Im not religious now, my family still is. Anyways I couldnt do an abortion so am now 18 weeks pregnant. My bf is super happy and excited to being a dad. I really wish we were married (weve been together 3 years, so why not marrry me? average dating period is 6 months-2.5 years...) and I struggle with this thought everyday. If she feels like me then she feels ashamed shes pregant and not married, now Im stuck to a man for life (as hell always be my babys daddy) even after we break up (lets hope it dont happen). Im imbarassed, have only told one person (hes told many). I cant face my family (lucky they live far) and have decided not to even tell them because that would be more rejection. But for me its not the fact that Im pregnant-its the fact that Im pregnant and NOT married...religious brainwash I guess. My bf always says why does a priest have to tell me my bf loves me? Hes here telling me this right now....then I dont believe people should get married because of a baby, marriage should be for love....its very confusing in our female minds. Its hard to explain, harder to explain so that a man will understand it....plus we are more emotional with all extra hormones. I guess as advice I say listen to why a husbad is so important to her-like me shes saying the non husband part bothers her, not the pregnancy part. Im going to have the baby, not married, but still with a bf who is supportive. Im told Ill fall in love with my child, maybe marriage is an option down the road. Is she decides to have the child you must be prepaired for a more emotional pregnant woman (can you imagine?!?!) maybe some depression ( I creid for about 1.5 weeks like all day and night and drove my man crazy) and looking ahead was hard, realizing more rejection could be ahead....anyways Ive written enough here, just listen to her concerns, ensure her you are there for her and the baby, no preist needs to validate your love for her...yadda yadda yadda
2007-01-26 23:50:37 · answer #7 · answered by flyer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if she can't have a baby without being married, she shouldn't have had sex without being married!
anyway, talk to her, and ask her if she would sign over parental rights to you. that all depends on your ability to raise this baby. can you financially, physically, and mentally raise one? if not, there is always adoption. give the child to someone who can't have one themselves.
the pill she is talking about may be an abortion one. there is not reason to kill a child. if she didn't want one, she shouldn't have had sex.
i don't know how young you guys are, but you two need to talk about this before she does something she regrets. abortion will affect her for the rest of her life.
i hope she makes the right decision.
2007-01-26 23:36:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Pray . . . you cannot do anything at this point. Ultimately, it's her body and her decision. If she truly does not want a baby, she surely does not need to have one. She's your girlfriend, but you do not love her? You don't need to be with her then. In the future, don't have sex with someone you do not intend on marrying and who does not want a child. Wear protection so this does not happen again.
2007-01-26 23:38:13 · answer #9 · answered by TeeDee 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Thats a tough situation. She cant get a pill now, its too late. You cant force her to have a baby if she doesnt want it. Did she get pregnant to get you to marry her?
2007-01-27 00:28:02 · answer #10 · answered by nikogal2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋