Ok, am I being paranoid? I saw an e-mail to my husband?

Question

that was from a girl that said............"I'm glad you called me back, it was nice to hear a familiar voice. If Tim and I ( her husband ) should ever get back to California we'll be sure to look you up. Take care."
We actually just got married and he used to live / work in another state about 5 years ago so I'm assuming this person is from his old job since he still deals with his old company quite a bit with his new job...??? I'm kinda freaking out right now.....am I being paranoid? She sent it about 2 months ago and he never mentioned it. Should I ask him about it? Not sure how I would without admitting I "accidentally" saw it.

Answer 1

I honestly think you are just being paranoid as there was nothing intimate said in her email. she is obviously just a married friend from your husbands past, and she did say that her and her husband would look him up, not just her. Stop worrying l'm sure everything is above board and you have nothing to worry about. If you are really concerned, ask him about it. There should be no secrets between you though and l'm sure it probably just slipped his mind or to him it was no big deal and that's why he didn't mention it. Calm down l'm sure it's nothing. Good luck

Answer 2

Well, it doesn't particularly sound like a problem to me. She obviously called him first right? Notice how she said "We'll be sure to look you up." not "I'll be sure..."

Also, if they don't live in the same state as you, I'd say you're in the clear.

By the way, what is the point of worrying about it really? If he isn't having an affair, then there's nothing to worry about. If he is having an affair, then he's having it, and it's too late to worry about it. Focus on your options, not your conceptions.

Plus, why would he have married you (so recently too) if he wasn't %100 into you? Why would he have moved away?
Yeah, I'd say you're on the paranoid side right now. It happens to everyone.

Answer 3

I know how you are feeling. I made the same mistake you just made. I say mistake because that email is going to rule your every waking thought. My advice is do not receal yet that you read it. It really sunds to me like no big deal. And if you bring it up to him he is going to think you were snooping. Don't tell him and maybe in a month or so just check his mail again for your own sanity. Its to soon to lead to drastic conclusions. Trust me. I did same thing, but my man was corresponding with another man "sexually" about what they would like to do to eachother if they ever met. Of course I confronted him. I was blown out of the water in shock! He never denied or admitted, just yelled at me for snooping. The emails stopped after that. A year went by and we were having some problems, and I found a password emailed from this adult friend finder site. He placed an ad looking for a descrete encounter with another man. So when I confronted him on this, he played with my head and said it was bait to see if I was still snooping. Yea right! Are sex life has always been great, he is a great lover. I did not want him to be embarrassed, so I told him go ahead and get naked cam to cam with anyone you want, masturbate for eachother, whatever. Just keep it ONLINE. Cyber, and don't bring it in to our reality. Anyway, I can clock his daily whearabouts to a tee, so I quit worrying. I know he is also a coward, very insecure and I believe he would never act on any of that. I myself learned the valuable lesson that some things are better left unknown.

Answer 4

No you,re not freaking out. I would feel the same.
He probably thinks it,s nothing special to report but
at the same time you ask yourself why keep it from you.
Ask your husband about it and just say that you were
'playing around' with the p.c. and found it be accident.
If he is on the defensive be aware. He might just laugh
it off. I,m sure he will be able to answer your question
and put your mind at rest. He won,t want you beating
youself up about it.

Answer 5

okay, obviously she is married and doesn't live in California. I don't
think you have anything to worry about. He married you . Also,
she mentioned her husband by name. I am sure if she was planning a secret rendevous, then she wouldn't bring him along. You need to ask yourself why are you reading his emails in the first place. I think he is completely innocent of any wrongdoing. You should be ashamed of yourself.

Answer 6

Keep it to yourself . You are being totally paranoid over an innocent conversation. He didn't mention it cause it was no big deal. If you continue to be this jealous and distrustful your marriage is doomed. Quit looking for trouble otherwise you will find it.

Answer 7

you are taking this way too far. she is just a friend. she is married herself. and the fact that she was talking about the both of them looking him up is just to catch up on old times. if it were to say something like them getting together for more than just being friends, then you should freak out. this is too small to be freaking out over.

Answer 8

So, he called a friend. He can have a life and conversations with you, can't he? If it will make you feel better, ask him about it. But she mentioned her AND her husband coming along. No need to worry.

Answer 9

Because she is talking about her husband as well in the email, I think it is fairly safe. I totally, though, can imagine how uncomfortable you must feel.

You could just ask him about her without revealing that you saw the email...

Answer 10

You have every right to anything he has and should not feel guilty for reading this email. If he loves you, he will care about how this has been hurting you for so long. The specific words you typed, I think they may be easily misunderstood. They could actually be harmless, but because of your love for him, you are hyper-sensitive, just as you should be ... he should not want that sensitivity to go away ... he should love you and care about your hurt and WANT you to be jealous and protective of his heart.