My friend and I had a discussion about sexless marriages. She thinks it is less prevelent. I think it is more prevelent but people just don't talk about it much. Is it possible to be truly happy in a marriage without sex? Only people who are in this situation need reply.
2007-01-26 19:44:45 · 20 answers · asked by squealy68 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Okay.... scratch the part about only people in the situation. I really am open to all opinions but thought it might be best to know from people who've had the experience. Go ahead all.... let me hear it!!
2007-01-26 20:17:15 · update #1
PL.... you cracked me up on the gumby thing. Also, I guess I was thinking more along the lines of..... is it common to still be in love and have a happy life with your partner without sex? Is it common for a marriage to survive if the couple is in agreement about the sexual frequency or infrequency I should say. I know there are many people who don't have sex with their partners for one reason or another.... an issue of some sort preventing the spark. But, can you agree to love and survive without it if it's just not that important to either anymore? Thanks to all who have answered. It is getting more interesting all the time!!
2007-01-26 20:30:58 · update #2
This is a good question! My husband & I love each other more than anything. We have been together 21 yrs. We have a mutual undertanding, our libidos seem to be in sync & we seem to be free of any hangups. We built our relationship on friendship & love first. Sure we were hot for each other, the sex was GREAT. I'm thankful for him just the way things are. Also we don't cheat on each other, we've abstained for about 10 yrs. I think if both husband & wife still love each other & it's a mutual arrangement then the marriage can last a longlong time. Sexless in the city...
2007-01-27 02:57:14 · answer #1 · answered by mojo 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's your sex life and you are the one that has to live with your decision. It is true that people can be committed to each other and not be married, however there would be a higher chance of break up when you are not married. Also you have to think about pregnancy. Do you want to have the possibility of becoming pregnant with a man that you are not married to? Probably not. Also ask yourself if it would matter to you if your partner has had sex before and you hadn't or vice versa. It would be hard for you to find a guy that could keep it in his pants that long. It sounds like you really haven't found a great guy for you yet. Don't just "give in" on the next relationship that really would not be the smartest move. Wait until you find a guy that you could picture yourself getting married to and are both very committed to each other, but there really is nothing wrong with waiting. Don't let your friends influence you on your decision. They will not be the ones that have to deal with the outcomes-you are.
2016-03-29 04:45:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not just all that common but it's not uncommon either ,,,, There are allot of couples that get along famously with out sex in the relationship ,,,, unlike some of the people who have answered this question ,,,, Sex is not necessarily a required activity in a marriage to express ones feelings for another ,,,, Those who have answered to the contrary are simply letting their glands do their thinking for them ,,,, They are in a sorry state if they think that it takes sex to love some one ,,,, They probably need to rethink their relationships maybe ,,,, You have to like some one before you can love them ,,,, And once you love them then you will have sex with them ,,,,But the love comes before sex not the other way around ,,,,Things progress in a relationship or marriage one step at a time ,,,, Sex in a normal relationship is usually the last step ,,,, So it doesn't necessarily have to follow that two people have to have sex to be happy with each other ,,,, Good question by the way ,,,, Rated a star as far as I'm concerned ,,,,, Yoda said this ,,,,,,,
2007-01-26 22:54:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Unless its a 90 year old couple who simply can't get from the chair, to the wheel chair, to the bed for sex, it's not a marriage at all. Its no different than two people sitting next to each other in Church who don't know each other.
By definition a marriage contains sex, and without it, or if there is a cold war in the sexual part of the marriage, then the seeds of destruction are already sown - other parts of the union will break down until divorce is on the horizon. Sexual intimacy separates marriage from having a tennis partner.
2007-01-26 20:21:06 · answer #4 · answered by syquest 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sex is the most natural, normal and HEALTHY thing imaginable between two people. The intimacy bonds lovers together. Even physically certain chemicals are released that make people closer and add to a lasting relationship. Unless there is a physical handicap. one that can't be overcome, this is a marriage that is in need of at least some serious counseling. Good luck and if you love her work on it, if not perhaps you two might both be happier with someone else. JMO
2007-01-26 21:10:04 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I got news for the first one "frozen" I and many of my friends, yes many, are under 80 and, some are under 60. You see there was a war, in fact there were several wars and many of us fought in those wars, there were many injuries in those wars. When a roadside bomb goes off, when a trail bomb goes off, when a booby trap goes off on the ground, where do you think it hits a person? guess.
Also many heart disease victims, arthuritis victims and cancer victims. What makes everyone think age has anything to do with sex? and, in fact I think it has little to do with it. I think injury, disease has more than anything.
And, why do you put "Love" and "sex" together, they're two different objects. Yes, you can have love, maybe a deeper love without sex, then with sex. what is sex, how long does it take, how about love. Those that have to ask the question know little about love or human feelings and emotions.
You can have sex with a prostitute, is this love? I have a deadly bone disease and will never be cured, the drugs I take have made me impotant, I started this at 48 years old. many people in our group were under fifty, some, I felt sorry for were from wars, were in there thirties. I have a very good relationship with my wife, she understands and feels that as long as I'm satisfied she is. There are other ways to satisfy her but, she chosen to abstain. We go to church regularly, we pray for our health now and the good days that we did have so, don't knock it lady.
2007-01-26 23:56:39 · answer #6 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I never knew it is common, but after seeing this question yes it is possible because I am in the same boat. I have a sexless marriage and am being married for 10years now. I still do not know if it is normal or not. I chose not to have sex due to the nature of my husband and his habits. It was not a mutual agreement. If my heart and soul are not into it I cannot have sex with him at all.
2007-01-26 20:05:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hi, You cannot have a good marriage with out sex. This is how a man,and woman become as close as you can get,without being one. You know having no sex,is grounds for a divorce. Yes this is very true. We have to have that closest to connect,and be happy with each other. Without sex,the marriage will not last.
Clowmy
2007-01-26 20:27:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was in a relationship for 9 yrs, the last 5 of those 9 I sleeped on our couch, I had no desire what so ever for this man to touch me, look at me, talk to me let alone have sex with him, he had become a total turn off to me the reason is because his sex drive was not the (NORM) for me he was all into trying me to get me to do and perform certain things that I was not even aware of. I believe that some parts of a human body are not made for certain kinds of sexual activity, so it just turned me off besides to ask me to position myself in certain ways was out of this world. HELLO! IM NOT GUMBY
2007-01-26 20:20:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
People get married to other people becuase they are in love. They have sex becuase they are attracted to them and they want to bone. People get married, then they get older, and fatter, and are no longer physically attractive. The love is there, but not the lust. They start saying thinks like, "do you want to have sex tonight" which ruins the mood completely. For any women lacking sex with their partners, work on the way you look.
2007-01-26 20:06:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋