My fiance broke things off with me...after recently seeing his ex wife. He does not know who he loves. The problem is...she left him about 5 years ago for a man whom she's been with all of this time. This man has no car...has a crappy job and she supports him. I've known about my man emailing her..and I used to read the emails...I didn't like it...but if they want to be friends...I cant stop that. Anyhow...she's thinking of leaving her man and my fiance and her have told each other they still have feelings for one another. Now my man is walking away from everything...to see how he truly feels. I am now left..with nowhere to go..and no car...I have to buy one when my taxes come in. I love him and have put up with a lot from him and I truly thought he was over her. I have been talking to her...but cant trust her...I dont want to hate her...but I feel like she should have left things in the past. I feel also like he shuld have left things in the past. I am a very ambitious person...she
2007-01-26 16:45:24 · 11 answers · asked by Starla 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
seems to have dwelld on her depression. She left him because he wasn't paying her enough attention and says she tried to make things work with the guy she left him for..but never stopped loving her ex husband. Im stuck in a very awkward position..because I know I have a lot of positive qualities...maybe he wants the one who isn't going to ***** about anything...oh and I've been here through his drug addiction too.....it seems like I should be the one he's comitted to....why would he want her...after what she did..and her not taking him back the numerious times he tried in the past? Why wouldn't he want someone who is smart and is going somewher in her life..someone who's stuck by him and loved him no matter what..why does he want to go back to the past? What could be his thoughts..anyone been in his situation...or my side...can help please?
2007-01-26 16:47:56 · update #1
oh and he said he did not physically cheat on me...I knew that he was going to see her "as friends"...and he kept telling me I was paranoid when I had a bad feeling about things. I dont know what to think...he says he didn't cheat..but i'll never know...He sees to be telling the truth...so by seeing her..i mean he hung out with her..
2007-01-26 16:49:04 · update #2
My heart goes out to you at this time. There is nothing that I can really say that can soothe this. It's just sad that it took him all this time to realize that he wants her back.....after you have invested so much physically, financially and emotionally.... The fact is they were married and even though he was with you, there was still apart of him that longed to be with her. Now that the opportunity has presented itself, he has taken it.
Honey, it's hard. I have gone thru a break up last year so I understand. Right now, you may not even be able to eat, sleep or concentrate because you thoughts are constantly on him and "how could he do this to me?".
Allow yourself to cry........Find a few good friends/family members that you can confide in and talk whenever you need to. Go to the gym/go for long walks, keep yourself busy and above all..........surround yourself with the people who love and care about you for support.
And remember this..........She'll dump him again!!!
2007-01-26 17:12:13 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Mandeville 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you love your brother and want him to be happy but this is a decision only he can make and whatever he decides just stick by him and support him as best you can. You can let him know that going back with his "heart" might not be wise, but for his children he might be able to save them from being like their mother - girls really need their fathers a lot more than society would like to think - I see so many females that have the wrong idea what a relationship should be like and those w/o their fathers or some significant male positive role model are more likely to have bad relationships and short marriages. They tend to go into relationships wanting to be rescued rather than becoming a partner - the poor guys try to be SUPERMEN but they cannot undo years of damage unless the female admits and works towards improving this void in her life. MEN need to teach their daughters about MEN - mommies cannot do that! Tell your brother how you feel (cheating is not the worst thing that happened in this situation) but most of all let him know you will support whatever decision he makes and be there if it works or fail. He's lucky to have a concerned sister - (also stay out of it directly with her) - your nieces will hate you if you attack their mom's character.
2016-03-29 04:34:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has some serious issused that he need to deal with, and
im sory to say that you are the one that this will affect the most
but you may not see it know but it sound like he a jerk and you
can do a lot better, trust me, he not the one and if your think
about it if he can go after everything that she has did to him
to go back to that, then he deserve what he get., his lost not
your , because the situation with them wont work out then
he will begging you for a another chance, and then you can
put in his face, what goes round come around.
2007-01-26 16:59:49 · answer #3 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, there is no point in thinking "why did she do this, why didn't she leave well enough alone, why did she have to.....", because she could not have re-kindled her relationship with your ex-fiance if he had not been a willing participant. Let him go. Aren't you glad you found out where his loyalties really lie BEFORE you actually married him?
2007-01-26 16:50:56 · answer #4 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What's wrong with you?Don't you respect yourself at all?I don't know what's happening with women these days.I mean it is clear,Cristal clear what's happening and what will happen next.Why stay,why beg>Honey they are working things out and gonna get together soon,real soon.If love is not there,there is nothing you can do.Leave with your dignity.There is a man out there ,who will love you and respect you for who you are.Just leave.You are extra.
Sorry,just being honest here.
2007-01-26 16:58:51 · answer #5 · answered by avavu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he never really got over her. You're probably better off finding out now instead of later.
2007-01-26 16:50:23 · answer #6 · answered by lady_blu_iz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her soon to be ex out, sounds like you both have things in common
2007-01-26 17:00:48 · answer #7 · answered by Skinz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him go it sounds like there is three people in your relationship. He simply never has gotten over her and I don't think he wants to.
2007-01-26 16:52:56 · answer #8 · answered by steffi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
pack your **** You have already done alot more then most women would... Hel come begging for you back and then you give hiim the NEW rules....
2007-01-26 16:51:32 · answer #9 · answered by GrassRootsRabbits 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think you need to talk to her personally...even if its hard
2007-01-26 16:53:07 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋