Cliff notes of my marriage: See other postings to get the most information #1 post “Will My Wife Turn into my mother-in-law?” #2 post “Need some help with my wife” Both posted today 01/25/2007.
My wife has depression which I found out(she knew) after the I do’s Wife has continues to lie, steal, deny, be stubborn, difficult, (on things that made no sense) and maybe cheat (not sure on that one) I have two step children, she’s been married twice, my first time. Treat them very good. She moved from the south to the NE where my job is. Within a month noticed my wife undermining the me/ family. So much that my step daughter underwent counseling for depression (cutting, “can only be happy in the south” her mom’s doing, and unsure of her sexual orientation. Spent thousands but, she worth it I was to work & she was to be the home keeper (One of our pre-marriage agreements) did the opposite till I said OK to her working ,now doesn’t want to work(and isn’t) Gave her plenty of cash & a credit card for emergencies. Used that card 15 to 30 times a month for 10 months (till she gave it back/ I said enough, I was very kind and loving) all while I am tending to my terminally sick mom (Talk about blind sided). Went through many more card methods nothing worked (no trust/keeps lying & stealing in other ways to) Find out that I have been supporting my mother-in-law during that time and funding my wife’s secret bank account. Within 6 months, M-I-L hit me up directly for money (which I gave to her) and later found out she expected monthly handouts because I have a good job.(wife denies all)
Found out I was going to lose my job in a couple months (airline down cycle) she refused to get a full time job cause “I don’t want to do any of those jobs” Said it will be temporary and let’s keep the kids(hers) in private school and keep the house. Still wouldn’t get a job. Sold my motorcycle, golf club membership and my SUV to lead the cutbacks. She demanded new furniture while I downsized. Luckily I found a job. Said she could have a reversal (before marriage) not true .Feel really doped on that one, I’m sure she knew that). Don’t think I want kids w/ her now There’s been some good times, she is nice looking , can be a sweetheart, sex is good, my family all likes her (but they don’t know any of this). Just this week found out that my wife also has secret PO Box, she got 3 more cards in her name, pays her cards debt w/ my (families) money. I could write about her behavior for hours. I would kindly forgive all this stuff but it keeps on happening. It’s been bottled up for years except for our two councilors. I’m afraid nothing is working. I’d also like my own children. Do I stay in this mess?
2007-01-26 16:07:11 · 9 answers · asked by Concerned Husband 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
NO get out now while you can still breath!!!!
2007-01-26 16:17:12 · answer #1 · answered by lilly l 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why didnt you take the clue before you married her? She had already been married TWICE! This bad behavior just continues because you allow it and put up with it. Why do you think 2 other men dumped her? You are lucky you don't have any children with her. Get out of that MESS of a marriage before they drain your soul too. She is money hungry. Cut up the cards take her off your cards and file for divorce. The sneaking around about a secret mail box can't be good either. But be glad that your wife had those extra cards put in HER name. Start documenting things, you will need that information for the lawyer. Good luck, now GET OUT..while you can.
2007-01-26 16:26:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hearing your story is very troublesome, but even more troubling is that you are remaining in a relationship with this person. While I am a big proponent for couples staying together to try to work through their problems, this appears to be an abusive situation where you can really only end up on the loosing end. Don't allow yourself to be taken advantage of by this women and her family or make excuses for her. As quickly as you can, seek out a lawyer and get out.
It sounds like you are a wonderful, caring person with a generous heart. You deserve so much more in a partner! Best of luck to you.
2007-01-26 16:45:50 · answer #3 · answered by cezanne sun 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HAY,NO Get Out before things get worse and she takes you for everything that you may have left.....I have suffered from depression and never did those bizzare things... If anything I stress honesy, hate the thought of anyone stealing in all senses of the word, and would not spend a dollar with out telling (even though I was working).. You sound like you have been too good and now are being taking for a ride.....ESCAPE......
2007-01-26 16:26:54 · answer #4 · answered by onlyme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a lawyer and possibly a PI quick. I agree with the "cash stash" and taking things out of joint accounts. Plan it out for a few weeks before taking action and then let it rip at once - you need to get your name off of her stuff quickly or it will kill your credit.
Get your credit report NOW and keep an eye on it - figure out how to close the accounts that you don't know about (and maybe teh ones you do if joint accounts).
Protect yourself! and quickly.
2007-01-26 16:19:50 · answer #5 · answered by going_crazy_30m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, why would you? Perhaps if you had stood up to her at one point......at any time, there may be some hope. But she'll continue to do whatever she can get away with. Obviously there's no limit to the abuse that you will accept.
2007-01-26 16:24:40 · answer #6 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
transfer as much money as possible out of shared bank accounts...keep some stash cash....and get a lawyer ASAP!!!!
2007-01-26 16:14:13 · answer #7 · answered by catywhumpass 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Funny! lol! 10!
2016-03-15 00:30:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO!
2007-01-26 16:41:04 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋