Okay, I've known this guy online for three weeks now and we spent many hours chatting online, we've seen each other on web cam, he is sooo HOT.. He just proposed to marry me and I really want him, I know many people would think that I'm crazy, but I'm just finding it so hard to say no. Any thoughts?
2007-01-26 14:29:16 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thank you all for answering this question.. This is exactly what everyone told me two years ago.. I've been married to this man for two years now. He is 40 and I'm 20 now and I can't be any happier.. we are very compatible and we never had a single fight.. My family loves him now after they strongly objected two years ago, and oh, I get along very well with his kids (9 and 6 years old).
2007-01-26 14:49:55 · update #1
If your question is legitimate, ask yourself this: Why is a "hot", supposedly mature thirty-eight year old man proposing to an eighteen year old girl whom he has never met and has only known on-line for three weeks?? There are so many potential dangers in such a relationship that it is mind-boggling. In truth, you know nothing about him other than what he wants you to know or believe. He could actually be anything, a sexual predator, any sort of criminal. You don't know. Do your parents know about him? Do NOT go by yourself to meet him. Confide your plans to someone whom you trust who is capable of advising you. Immediately!!
2007-01-26 14:46:41 · answer #1 · answered by Lynci 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi!
I am 46 this February. When I was 28 and living and working in England as a radio DJ, I married an 18 year old English woman. She was very mature for her age and we got along wonderfully. I had reservations, but I married her anyway. Everyone said age didn't matter. It lasted two years and she left me for a man that was younger. That's not where the story ends. I did it again two years later with a young English woman, again 18. This one lasted 5 years and then she changed and moved on with another younger guy. All in all, I married 5 times. Yes, I am ashamed of myself, but I believed that I could be happy with a marriage and I had a lot of young women that wanted to be with me.
My opinion is that while it can work, you BOTH will change over the years and changes are likely to be dramatic. These changes will most likely occur on your part, you being the youngest and having so much to experience and so much growing to do. Believe me when I say that he has already done the growing and he will change a lot more as he gets older. His change and your change are not likely to b compatible. The chances of your getting pregnant and having his child are also very high. If this happens, change you both will. The children are unfortunately the ones that have to pay when Mom and Dad get divorced. I also realized that all of my wives did not have a father in their lives and it has occured to me that they were all looking for a father figure in me. It also occured that when they got older, they realized that I was a father figure and then left me for younger men closer to their age group and then hated or resented me, alot like they would their own fathers. I suspect that you are probably a young woman that has no father or not a very good relationship with your father. If I am right about this, you really need to analyze your feelings and perhaps seek counseling. The worst thing that you can do is get married, divorced, mess up your life, the childs life and the older guys life. Take marriage very seriously I didn't and it had profound consequences. By the way...Sooooo hot, is not a good indicator of what a persons character is. Soooo hot disappears after about five years.
Lloyd Ha;;
2007-01-26 14:51:40 · answer #2 · answered by lloyddouglashall 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, I have thoughts... but I am going to keep this clean. Ok, first of all, what kind of guy do you think would be 38 yrs old and asking an 18 yr old to marry him after only 3 wks of chatting online?? Not a "winner" in my book. Also, are you really that dense? Do you really believe that the picture he's showing you is actually him?
I know of this guy who always fell for these women online, and every time, they showed him a "hot" picture of themselves. Well, when it came time for him to meet his future "bride", each time, she turned out to be a whole different person and NOT the one in the photo! In fact, being as polite as I can about this, they were really awful, fat, slobs that never took care of themselves. And they thought that it would be ok to use the photos that werent even them, because they believed that once the guy fell in love with them, then looks won't matter at that point and it will all be ok! I am so sorry, but it is not that looks are everything, or should be anything, but lying is lying!!! Deceit is deceit!!
Well, I feel so sorry for you that you are actually that gullible that you are falling for this game. I hope you come to your senses! At least try to get sane before you do something really, no wait.... something unbelievably stupid.... no wait ...before you do one of the dumbest things humans can do on the planet!!!
2007-01-26 14:40:52 · answer #3 · answered by zaytox0724 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, imo, you are crazy. You can't possibly know someone well enough to marry them after only 3 weeks. Marriage is a huge commitment and shouldn;t be taken lightly. It's one thing fancying each other like mad, but a completely different thing to deciding you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. Don't confuse lust for love and don;t get caught up in the moment when making such a big decision. Maybe if you both like each other you should spend a bit more time in each others company (i.e NOT on the net). Get to know each other a little more before rushing into anything. Hope everything works out well for you. Good luck.
2007-01-26 14:39:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think at the very least you should make him buy you barbies & her pink corvette & fun house.. Plus a teddy bear and lottsa candy... some mary janes and a nice plaid skirt might be nice too.. OHHH and make him drive you to the mall every saturday so you can hang out with yer friends.. and shop at Hot Topic
Hey i'm not against it.. (why would i be I'm 47.. cept 18 year old females are BORING in the U know what dept... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz)
But hey better you than me.. hes way to old for my tastes in boys.. (and i'm a male) Nd I'm pretty mych certain I'm way hotter at age 47 than he is at 38 (I've never really had much competition LOL at any age)
What do I think? honestly I think yer an IDIOT... (and I'm thinking said 38 YO isnt playing with all his marbles either.. I wouldnt consider marrying ANYONE in a year of dating (actually at this point NEVER I''l cop to the truth) let alone 3 weeks.. and well 2 STUPID people shouldnt get married.. there should be a law aginst that.. (call me after yer divorce... You may be ready to "PLAY" with then...
2007-01-26 14:39:39 · answer #5 · answered by darchangel_3 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it. He doesn't sound safe if he proposed plus u are 18. It's a known fact that people who marry really young like that end up getting divorced later. So don't do it. Plus for all u know he could be a pedifile. By the way marrige is not just a romantic dream it's REAL WORK. Once the romance wears off u will realize what a mistake this has been. Please don't marry this guy.
2007-01-26 14:43:14 · answer #6 · answered by missgigglebunny 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't really matter what we think.
But since you asked, I think you have a lot of growing up to do. What you describe sounds more like infatuation... sooo HOT and you "want" him.. Three weeks is really not a lot of time to know a person. Do you really know what type of person is on the other side of the keyboard? There's so much you DON'T see.
I met my husband online and we chatted for 10 months before we met. We've been together 10 years. But we were in our 30's when we met and had a lot of life experience.
2007-01-26 14:38:35 · answer #7 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You might have asked this before you planned on the marriage. This late in the game, I can't offer too much advice as one should never marry a person if one has to ask anyone what he/she thinks of your doing so. That most always means insecurity and not knowing if one is doing the correct action. When someone hasn't met someone in person it is impossible to know if there is an attraction. It is like one opened up a phonebook and found a number and for three weeks one drooled over what one thought that person was like.
2007-01-27 14:29:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well this seems be like a perfect plan now, he is just not able to adjust with u thats for sure and somewhere i feel he is kinda greedy for more and more.. i know marriage is one of the most important thing in life so what i would suggest u to is that if u feel he is not worth living with anymore then its better u ask for all the money he has got and then tell him to stay away from ur family then only u r going to give him divorce if thats not happenign no way he can get married again to another woman , uve spent 18 wonderful years of ur life making his life better and now he wants to get away with soem stupid excuse.. then no way ur letting him do it to u.. protest it and do whatever u can do.. but make sure he doesnt get any of the money, property or anyting else.. after all ur gonnna be the one who is going to take care of the kids.. wish u luck...
2016-03-29 04:23:34 · answer #9 · answered by Irene 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
AGE IS NOT THE ISSUE
my husband and i are12 years apart 19 and 31. We are madly in love and ahe has never been an issue BUT......
You barely know him and you have NEVER even met him in person. ALSO you say and "he is soooo hot" if you plan on marrying him ,know that marriage is serious and is something that should last a lifetime, IF youre in it for looks,it aint going to work out cause looks fade and change in a lifetime but TRUE LOVE doesnt.If anything get to know theREAL him and how he treats you in person instead of through electronics.You are young and you dont have to rush into anything.
2007-01-26 14:54:43 · answer #10 · answered by mommylove 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋