What do you do or say when you have been going through many challenging changes for some length of time?

Question

For a few years now, and especially in the last year or so, I have been going through some major changes in my life and I am not sure how I am getting through them, I just know that I have to and that I am. I am not sure what the future holds for me right now. I am just wondering if there is anyone out there that has went through a long period of time where many things were changing in their lives all at once from living arrangements, family relationships and major illnesses, friends, job or professional relationships, and things like that. How did you make it through it and how did you keep yourself going and in a positive frame of mind? Do you have any good suggestions for anyone else going through anything like this in life? Do you have any good words of support or encouragement for them?

Answer 1

When I was 12 my grandparents died. I overheard my aunt telling my dad (her brother) that we had to get through it because basically we have no other choice. We can be strong and fight our battles or we can curl into a ball in the corner. For me, I'd rather fight. All these things you are going through will make you one tough cookie. We are only as strong as the things we go through. Good Luck!! E

Answer 2

Periods of huge emotional upheaval are very draining and it is fantastic that you are hanging in there. I would suspect that when everything calms down is when you are likely to go into a period of depression (if at all). You must have learned some coping mechanisms through all of this and whether they are good or bad, you should take the energy that you have put into all the change to do something positive for yourself to keep yourself fulfilled and interested in life. Take up a hobby that you have been meaning to take part in or try something new like dance lessons. Something positive that you will get a kick out of and something physical will help release those all important feel good endorphins. Exercise is so important for a healthy frame of mind. Your breathing improves and you feel better, you may lose a few pounds and you will sleep better which can be the difference between barely surviving a day and living it to the fullest. I'm sure this period has made you take stock of what is important in your life and you should try and live by what you have learned. If you haven't been keeping a journal, you could always start now. It helps to drop a lot of that emotional baggage, even in a book. I would hope to say that all the change was a cluster and you will be more settled for the near future but no one really knows what the future holds. Good luck with it all and keep your chin up =)

Answer 3

Oof. Anyone reading your question can almost taste the blood you're sweating. Here's what I always used as a mantra when my life was in flux: This, too, will pass. Understand that everything happens exactly when it is supposed to and we have little to no control over when stuff hits us or why. We are little ants going about our way and sometimes a kid with a stick scatters our home and we're left dumbfounded as we don't even know what a kid or a stick is! But there is a plan. Life works. And every crisis finds level ground. Ghandi said (sic) - it may look like the bad is gonna win, but in the end, the good ALWAYS does. So look for the lessons because that's what struggles are for and always know that when you get on the other side of this (and you will, but you'll never understand how) it will all just be a story you will tell at a time in the future when you are happy once again.

Answer 4

I hear ya believe me. The last couple years were the worst years i had after my big marriage downfall. I believe it is all about presence of mind- or mind over matter. I went through a series of so-called misfortunes but then i realized i have no one to blame but myself. The hardest part of all is falling in love with someone who is not real or who doesn't want to become real. i was confused because i kept getting encouragements, subliminal messages, to a point i couldn't handle and I became really sick. it's hard to explain this kind of sickness when your body is just affected and deteriorates, i believe due to depression.
I came back up, picked myself up one more time and conditioned my mind that I have a life to live, no one else is going to live that life up for me, but only me. Now, i am a bit stronger highly unlikely to fall again. Whatever I see now, is just a part of nothing that will affect my mind again.
My advice, value your life, don't worry too much about what future will hold for you. As long as you do well with your career, have a roof over your head, the rest of what you want in life will come on it's own pace. Do not let your mind be controlled by your heart, i am saying this if negative outcomes prevail, otherwise, you're good to love anyone.
I have been following up your questions. I feel that you may be deppressed? Well I hope you're okay=)

Answer 5

We all will have times of difficulties and trials, some small and
some large, some of short duration, some of lengthy duration
like yours. The only answer I would have is that the Bible teaches
that all things, good and bad, are used by God for the eventual
betterment of the person who loves Him. Romans 8:28.

It is through times like these that we learn, grow stronger and eventually become better able to help those around us overcome
difficulties and hardships. I would encourage you to hold on to
your faith and pray for strength. The sun is still shining, despite
the clouds...and when the clouds finally drift away, your world
and your life will be so much brighter than it would have been
had these troubles not come your way.

Answer 6

try to find what is good and right, no matter how small, when things seem down,,,,,, and hang in there, as you are doing,,,,, if possible, try to find a new hobby, or get involved in an old one, whether its reading,,,, creating a web page,,,,, exercise etc,,,,, this way, if you can add that in a few times each week, it will give you something thats constant,,, something you can feel involved in , and something you enjoy,,,,,,,, take each thing as it comes, deal with it,, and go on,,,,,,,, you are maturing, and even from the negative you learn,,,,, its hard i know to stay positive,,,, let yourself cry if you need to,,,, just dont dwell in sadness and the "oh woh is me" ,,,, if nothing else works, remind yourself how many others are much worse off then you,, and would be happy to only have your problems
ps: i ended a relationship,,,,, was unemplyed a year,,,,, got back to work,,, few months later the day before i got my first really big check(lots of overtime) was ran into by my daughters dog, fractured my knee,, spent my money on pain pills, was out of work 6 months, got back to work, and my mother passed away,,,,,,, was a rough couple of years,,,, but i made it,,,,, i know you will also

Answer 7

I have been through ruff spots before. And i'v gotten through them okay. Well have to see in the future if they were the right ones or not. But I kept my head positive by telling myself 'You gotta do this, does it really matter how? You just have to. Lifes to short to not do the things I want, and lifes to short to just sit back and wait to see what happens. Even if the things are bad, get past them and welcome in the new. At least one of them has to be good.' Just never give up. Be strong, even when you feel like falling to the ground and just staying there. More people will learn to respect you and you will learn you can make things as difficult or as easy as you want. Try to make everything good, and never let yourself down. If theres something you want to say, say it. Something you want to do, DO IT!!!! You cant sit around and look through all the ugly times you had and think thats it, thats all it ever will be. Dont wish that you were back in the past, everything happens for a reason. Just love yourself and other around you and you should get the help and support you need to get through all those situations. Hope this helps. Though im only fourteen, I really want to help people. And I really hope thats what I get to do later in life.

Answer 8

Yes. I feel for you. Any change (even a change for the better) is stressful. Major changes such as moving, new job, new relationships etc each take a toll on you. It's difficult. Last year I went through many changes: new home in a new community, new job, new boyfriend, a friend passing away, a father with health issues. Now I've had another friend pass away. It's difficult. Sometimes I don't think I'm strong enough or I can't take it anymore. I want to be able to relax. I want to get to my safe place. I want to stop worrying, stop feeling anxious. I need to feel my feet on solid ground, but it seems to keep crumbling beneath me....

Somehow you just get through it. Cry if you need to, write your feelings down, talk to someone. Do things to relax (I'm trying yoga, bubble baths, watching comedies) whatever works for you. Try to find calm amid the chaos. Find your zen. A sense of peace within yourself no matter what is going on around you.

You will be ok. You are not alone. Many of us feel overwhelmed. It can be hard to be positive when life is getting you down, but you find a way. You look at the beautiful things in life & it makes life worth living even when it's painful.

Take care of yourself. Physically: get enough rest, eat right & exercise. Emotionally: talk to someone when you need to, sometimes it helps just to get it out of you. If there's no one on hand to talk to, then write about it. Writing is great therapy. I'm a songwriter myself. I wrote two songs about my friend that died tragically and it helped to feel like I was keeping his spirit alive, paying tribute to him.

You are stronger than you think. We are a very resilient species. We can live through a lot. & there will come a day when things will settle down a little & you can look back with satisfaction at all the things that you've overcome & you can relax. Life is filled with changes though. You can never control or foresee every aspect of life. You just have to learn to accept & make your peace with it. Whatever life brings, you deal with it and strive to be happy.

Take care.

Hugs.

amp

Answer 9

Perseverance! I know it sounds too simple I know...

I think there's a God trying to get your attention and do things
with you that you (right now) that you probably don't understand at this time. If you don't believe me... Check this out...
I JUST heard this msg! Is it by chance that I hear this and read and see your question?... Listen to it!... "Encouragement to Persevere" ( Part 1 and 2) see Source below:
Keep an open mind! A year ago you never would have guessed where you would be now! So keep an open mind!

Answer 10

Yes I understand. Have just gone through several years when my family suffered health issues, deaths, divorce, difficulties. While going through them I just, with G-d's help, asked for guidance and the strength and wherewithal to deal with that day's issues. I wrote a lot, trying to sort out what I needed to do and what was my responsibility to do. I shared my questions with close friends who I trust, and who gave helpful feedback. For a long time it seemed as though I was in a hurricane - being buffeted by storms and winds. It was very tough. Thank G-d things have quieted a little now.

What helped the most was keeping close to my Higher Power and asking for strength and direction on a daily basis.

G-d bless you.