at what age can children legally decide not to visit the non custodial parent?

Question

My son has Duchene Muscular Dystrophy ,doesnt want to go to daddys house because him and his wife smoke in the house. I gave him(my x) a perscription from my sons pulmonologist not to smoke around my son, they have ignored it, when my son goes to his house he always comes back choked up and congested. He doesnt want to go to his house anymore?

Answer 1

The legal way is to petition the court for a remodification hearing to child custody/support/visits. Explain to the judge what youve said above and want to modify visitation for child endangerment purposes. Tell him your son is complaining and tired of feeling sick while at and after visits with Dad. Youre doing this so it wont damage any child support if you just refuse Dad visits. You have a good case here.

Answer 2

First and foremost.... the age at which a judge will listen to a child's opinion on custodial issues is age 12. By age 18, they are free to do as they please, as they are adults.

You should get a restraining order first... they are easy to come by, and will prevent the immediate risk to your son. Having a restraining order on file with the court will keep your son at a safe distance from your ex at all times, and also will suspend visitations until the matter is resolved.

Then, seek out a lawyer. There are many free lawyers for familial issues, and if you look up information about your son's condition, there may be a grant that will pay for the expenses incurred to ensure his good health.
What the lawyer will do, is amend the custody agreement, so that your son can only have supervised visitations, which means he will have to pay out of pocket for a case worker to sit at his home while he is with his son, watching everything. When the case worker sees something that goes against the court orders, like the smoking, the visitation is terminated, and your son comes home. After a series of these types of visits, it might get it through to him, and if not, he'll have to pay to get the court to reverse their order.

Good luck... you're a good mother.

Answer 3

If there is a court order granting visitation, then you have to allow visits to take place. Now, if you refuse to do that, then your ex can take you to court to enforce visitation, & you can say what you just said here. It's always better to be prepared before going to court however, & since your son doesn't want to go, & it is not in his best interests physically, perhaps the pulmonologist can write a letter, in addition to the prescription, stating the effects that smoking around your son can have on him. You can also document each time you have asked your ex to refrain from smoking. Keep track of the conversation you had (write down what was said), the date & the time. Keep a log of how many times you had to talk about this issue. This way, when you are able to tell the court that your son has stated he doesn't want to see his father, and you have a doctor's prescription which was ignored, and a doctor's letter stating it is not in your son's best interests, and you also have documented each time you have made this request to your ex and have documented the results of these requests, then the court will likely side with you and stop visitation or recommend supervised visitation that ensures no smoking around your son. It's always better to pursue legal avenues first, but if this is becoming a serious issue, then you can stop visits, but prepared with appropriate documentation, because your ex will likely take you to court to enforce visitation. FYI - a non-custodial parent cannot withhold child support just because they are being prevented from seeing their child.

Best wishes to you and your son.

Answer 4

A child can decide at any time not to go on visitations, the non custodial parent can not force the child to visit. However the custodial parent can NOT interfere in any way with the visitation order. All you can do is advice your ex as well as the court of your son's problems and ask that your husband comply with doctor's orders, you can not deny your ex's visitation.

Answer 5

The courts don't consider child support payments a bargaining chip to see your child. Not making child support payments does not excuse the custodial parent of honoring the visitation agreement nor does not honoring the visitation agreement excuse non payment of child support. In most states, the age that a child can sign the necessary paperwork to state which parent they prefer to live with (which a parent has to file) is 14. In order for the child to request that they not have to visit a parent at all is very complicated. I have only known one person who did this and she sent her letter to the judge. She was 16 when she did it and the judge overturned the visitation orders. I live in Texas and have never heard anything like it, but I work in a law-related business and have learned that judges have a lot of discretion.

Answer 6

Talk to his doctor about this as this probably is not a healthy or safe environment for him to be around because of the smoking... Make sure they write a medical note and reason for it or it will not stand up in court. Get a good attorney to help you with this. If they are ignoring what is best for his health then you need to go to court and get his visitations stopped for health and medical reasons. Age should not even matter here because this is a medical and health reason and if the smoke and he is getting sick and they do not care that is medical neglect and abuse. You really need to contact and attorney.

Answer 7

This has nothing to do with his age..
This has to do with medical issues.. u can take him to court and let the judge know whats going on, show proof to the doctors.. heck if u had them id take your clothes from ur son after being at his house put them in a zip lock baggie and prove that that they smell of smoke.. .. he will either have to quit smoking in his house, or find other means of seeing his son, if his health is in jeopardy thats all u need, they may even prevent visitations to his house, or possibly supervised visitations.. but take him back to court and explain to the judge ur concerns..

Answer 8

Not for nothing - but this sounds like abuse to me. If the child has a medical problem and they continue to be selfish enough to ignore it I would see what the courts have to say about it. Protect your child. Have you explained to his father that he doesn't want to go because of the smoking?? He may not listen to a dr's note but if he loves his son - he should listen.

Answer 9

You can have the visitation order amended so that they aren't legally allowed to smoke around him, because of his medical condition. It wouldn't be that hard since you have medical documentation. My husbands ex girlfriend had it put in their agreement that we were not allowed to smoke around their son and we had to abide by it or we could be held in contempt. (at that point I was pregnant and we both quit anyway - she was the only one that smoked at the time).

Answer 10

This sounds like you need a court order to protect your child's health. I can't see a judge forcing you to put a minor child's health in peril.