how can i be more assertive with people?

Question

i would love to be more confident i always think other people are better than me even when i know there (not) weird or what? can anyone give me any help on this please ps.i had a bad childhood

Answer 1

Coming from the same place, (from the little detail you have given), that you have been, this is how it is done. Simply by putting one foot in front of the other and practice practice practice. Start talking, open that mouth, shout from the rooftops don't be afraid to say NO and LOVE YOURSELF , you are wonderful no matter who you are or where you have been. Live for now. No one is better than or can compare to YOU!! If you love you no one can ever touch that!! What is greater than the one you truly love?? At first when you approach this new way of living you might stumble a bit at first and at times regress back to the insecure side again. However, if you wish to be confident BE CONFIDENT! You can do this and MAKE this happen! It is honestly very simply when you go out there and do it. Once i actually had the guts and put my blinders on and went out there and got what i wanted and told people HERE I AM LIKE IT OR NOT!! I AM MEEEEEEEEEE HEAR ME ROAAAAAAR!!! It was over i was freeeeeeee at last and wow do i love the confidence and people either like me or they don't.......if they don't not my problem. Same thing with you, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain!

Answer 2

i doubt that it is weird. because of the fact that most people compare themselves to others. i believe that it is human nature. but i think that your situation is a Little different for the fact steaming from your bad childhood as you say. you may not have felt appreciated or loved. but try this when u first get up in the morning look at your self in say that you are loved and are important. after a couple of times doing this. you will believe what you are saying and you will become confident. keep your head held high!!

Answer 3

Listening is essential to communicating well with anybody, and because listening is frequently slighted by would-be motivators, Listening is only the first half of the good motivator's communication skill set. The other half is talking. It's speaking to the people you want to turn on in such a way that they will listen to you, and be willing to change their Behaviors in ways that you want them to change.

You might think that this would be the simpler half of the skill set to learn: since most of us get so much more practice in talking than in listening, it might seem that coming out and asking for what we want would be an awful lot simpler than hearing what other people want. But it doesn't work that way. Instead of asking, your average manager/motivator resorts to telling, or selling, or yelling—and as a result runs into stone walls.

The problem is basically one of tone. In order to get your people to really listen, and respond, to what you say, you have to be assertive but not aggressive, and few of us know how to draw that balance.

A really great link for mastering self-assertive skills is this one:

http://www.landmarkeducation.com/

Answer 4

Get a therapist and work with them on how to increase your self esteem. You have to learn to believe that you are worthy of good things and praise, that you do not have to feel like a second class citizen to others and that they do not have the right to take advantage of you.

Answer 5

Pretend. That's how I do it. I just pretend like I'm not nervous and that I don't feel unsure of myself. That gets me started and before I know it, I am.