They are 29 and 25 yrs old. They turn on the TV, radio, get on the phone and mess aournd in his house and make a big mess and usually wake him up and he doesnt say anything about it.
I planned a dinner date with him and his mother and brother the other day and anyone else he wanted to invite, so I woke him up to ask him how many people were coming because I had to get to the bank before they closed to get some money. He threw a fit because I woke him up. He is still harping on it. I paid over $100 bucks for everyones dinner and drove 80 mi to get to the restaraunt. He acts so unthankful. Why does he gripe at me, but not his adult kids, and grandkids and other people who wake him up? He works nites.
2007-01-26 07:16:17 · 21 answers · asked by happydawg 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Unfortunately when spouses are in selfish mode, it's the wives who suffer. The best thing you can do is talk about it. If that doesn't work, suggest counseling. Your feelings are valid and you may need a 3rd person to help him see that.
2007-01-26 07:24:21 · answer #1 · answered by Oh Suhnny Day 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not for nothing but they are his kids and he is use to it because they are his kids. Maybe because they've done it all their lives and it doesn't bother him. Now you, to wake him up to see how many people are coming probably bothered him because for men, usually women are suppose to handle these things. Now, I am sure if you had to go to the bank that meant you have a checkings or savings therefore you could've paid dinner with your bank card or just have had common sense to bring extra money for any other reason.
Anyway, I am not trying to be rude but I know that if I was paying for people's dinner I would bring extra extra money.
Plus your boyfriend should already get over it. I would've gotten mad at you when you woke me up but not continue with it like if I was a nagging old man. Tell him to get over it. Tell him next time you will wake him up for a little pookie-pookie if you know what I mean, then he will want you to always wake him up.
2007-01-26 15:34:09 · answer #2 · answered by Life Is Amazing 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids (no matter how old they are) are still his kids and they tend to get away with more things than anyone else. It's a fact of life and there's nothing you can do to change it. Not everyone is like that but most are. You'll just have to work around his sleeping and ignore the kids. Don't clean up after them or anything like that, just ignore them except when they are invited over and above all, don't confront him with his kids. It could start something you don't want to start.
2007-01-26 15:27:45 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think he feels guilty maybe about the relationship he had with his children while they were growing up...maybe he feels by allowing them to come in use his things and wake him up he is not only getting a little time with them that he may not have spent before but thinks that might solve some old issues they once had by allowing them to take advantage...as for the way he treats you...he knows you love him so we tend to lash out at those we know wont leave us or hold it against us...his kids might hold it against him and he feels like he may lose a relationship with them or the grandkids...my dad is kinda the same way but treats us like your husband does you...his girlfriends can call and wake him up or want something and he is on it..but if i ask or my brothers ask him or want to hang out we kinda get some dr.jeckle/hyde attitude...my dad is a great guy and he would do anything for us but sometimes he treats the ones that love him the most a bit rough..because regardless we will always be there...good luck to ya
2007-01-26 15:30:58 · answer #4 · answered by michele m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are an angel from the sounds of it, only you know in your heart what's best for you. I'd kick him to the curb, he sound ungrateful, don't you think you are a worthy person to deserve someone better. Just look at him and think about it, with them adult men coming over and acting like animals, wow! I would not put up with him If I were you, move on to greater! Them adult people have no sense of class!
2007-01-26 15:27:03 · answer #5 · answered by HOPE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time his kids are there being all noisy, make a big deal to HIM....remind him of how he acted when YOU woke him up....if that doesnt work...do the same thing back to him, next time he wakes you up for any reason, throw a huge fit and make it the biggest deal in the world...maybe then he will get it...but probably not. good luck!
2007-01-26 15:24:40 · answer #6 · answered by spaceyinla 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it time to fine someone new. He yells at you because he knows he can get away with it. If I where you I would make myself scares and not always ad-viable for him. As far as his kids are concern he doesn't want to be the bad guy so he won't say anything to his kids about waking him up. It sounds like he really don't have time for you with all that commotion in his home. He doesn't appreciated you.
2007-01-26 15:31:22 · answer #7 · answered by honeybunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He obviously needs some time away from you so he can place blame where blame belongs.It is only too convenient for him to direct his misguided anger towards you and not the family members who have worked so hard to deserve it the most.If your gone he'l have no choice but to vent on his children instead of you.If you stay you'l take all the credit for how his children treat him.And thats not fair to you.
2007-01-26 15:34:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get the gripe because he still sees them as not knowing any better. You, he thinks, know better. He holds you as a responsible adult. he thinks they're inconsiderate boobs. He expects better from you because he knows that you truly care about him as a mature adult.
Now then, lick your wounds, he didn't mean to hurt you and he appreciated the dinner. You're his gem!
You're the person that not only understands his needs but does her best to respect his needs. Again, you're his gem. A place to rest in a weary, wary land that makes men work nights.
2007-01-26 15:24:02 · answer #9 · answered by TygerLily 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he probably feels more comfortable with you and not so guilty in yelling...let it go in one ear and out the other if you care for him..it is not that big of a deal. It also sounds like you two are older so in my opinion if I were you, ignore it or move on with some one else...they are his kids and his family and you can become one too...give and take...life can sure be a ***** some time.
2007-01-26 15:31:20 · answer #10 · answered by teresatess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋