I have been dating my current girlfriend for about 8 months. We never really discussed age or anything, but I knew she was under 21 because she can't drink. She just told me a couple days ago that she is only 15 years old, and her parents found out about us because she is pregnant. I'm 26 and we have been sexually active for most of the relationship. Her parents have forbidden us from seeing each other, but she sneaks out at night and comes over to my house. I live with my mom and she is telling me that I should stop seeing Jen, but we are in love and I simply can't do that. Now Jen's parents are trying to get a restraining order and threatening to charge me with statutory rape. Does anyone know where we could move to where the age limit doesn't apply? I'd prefer not to leave the U.S. but would if that was the only option. Please help us!!
2007-01-26 04:54:51 · 27 answers · asked by dan k. 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
ok... thank you guys for the advice, but I feel that I need to follow this up because I wasn't completely honest. I did know that she was underage, but ONLY because I saw her ID about 6 months ago, but she DIDN'T know that I saw it, and as far as she knew I still thought she was legal. That should be enough, for all I knew it was a fake ID saying she was younger than she is. Point being; she didn't tell me her age. I still would like to take her somewhere that we can not be prosecuted for our love, and her parents I'm certain will not accept it, but you all raised some valid points and I may go and wait for her to become of age to come join me. Thanks for the advice.
2007-01-26 08:28:33 · update #1
Ouch scary and I am not going to be mean to you because When i was a teenager I passed myself of as a older woman. If she is sneaking out to see you I would stop and talk to a lawyer. You may need one. I also got pregnant at 15 by a man who was 27. You may want to start counseling for the sake of your freedom. A judge may be more forgiving knowing that it was a mistake and you know it was wrong and you are doing something about it. Stop seeing her as per her parents request. Your playing with fire andyou will get burned.
2007-01-26 05:10:49 · answer #1 · answered by momof3 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
How did U not know she was 15? When you asked her if she could drink and she said she was under-aged why didn't you ask her age then? Were you hoping she wasn't 11 years younger than you, so you didn't ask? My sister is a high school freshman will be 15 years old this year and I'm a college freshman and 18yrs. (to be 19 next month! YEAH...ahem...) Her and her friends (or anybody in that school who's not a senior) do not, at all, look like they could be as old or older than me.
No thing at all made U ask how old she was? Did she ever bring up she had "detention" or "after school activities"? Did U notice she said, "teacher" and not "Professor"; "marking period" and not "semester"? I'm just sayin' there are some hints that will give the person's age way or that they are much younger than you think.
There is no where in the U.S. where age doesn't apply. I guess you could try to make a deal with the parents by saying you be there for her and help take care of the baby. Maybe you can tell them that it would be difficult for the kid to grow up w/o a father and you want to be there. Play the sympathy card and see where that gets you. Don't say anything you're not willing to actually do.
But it sounds to me like you two were in lust, not in love. I was listening to the radio and a man was saying by not having sex in a relationship he was forced to get to, actually, know the girl and he liked it better that way. It would seem that you two were too busy gettin' busy to get to know each other. But the girl's parents are probably gonna charge you anyway.
2007-01-26 06:43:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you know the answer to this question. At least, you should. How could you have not known that this girl is 15 years-old? Doesn't she attend high school during the day? I'm sure there were plenty of signs. I happen to think that you are a pedophile and you need to get help right away. Or, maybe you are simply immature, since you are 26 years-old and still at home with your mother. Do you work? What's the deal here?
2007-01-26 06:55:00 · answer #3 · answered by ? 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think before you consider adding kidnapping to statutory rape you should try talking to her parents. It won't be easy but if you can convince them that you love their daughter, that you don't mean her any harm and you were genuinely unaware that she was underage (and whose fault was that? presumably she knows how old she is, she obviously choose not to tell you) then they may begin to take a different view. It might sound like an impossible task but it may not be. My step son, became involved with our daughters friend. He was 30 when the began communicating and she was 13. No we didn't really approve but he's an adult, what can we do. Her parents were understandably upset. I did tell them that he would not hurt her, that if they wanted what was best for her he is a good man if a bit immature. It took some time but eventually they got used to him and even put him up in their home. He claimed they wouldn't have sex until she was old enough even though she wasn't a virgin. I never inquired if they kept to that, some things I just don't want to know. Your girlfriend being pregnant is obviously going to be very distressing for her family but if you can demonstrate that though you both made a mistake you will stand by her they may come round. Clearly you love this young lady a lot, convince her parents of that.
Good luck
2007-01-26 05:52:12 · answer #4 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
They can charge you with statutory rape cause she is under age, and you know that. You are old enough to take care of a baby so the baby should go to you seeing as you probably have a better job than she does.
I am not sue about the 'age limit doesnt apply' thing...
2007-01-26 05:01:27 · answer #5 · answered by --; cookie. 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
“I think the whole statutory rape thing is crazy, believe there are lots of 15 year olds who want the sex.”
Well, just because they want something, it doesn’t mean they should get it and break the law! You think the law is crazy? Is that what you mean? Well, if you think so, write to the governement about it. You should be old enough to also know that 15 year olds sometimes don’t know what they want and can’t make up their own mature decisions for their lives. And that’s one reason why it’s the law.
So next time, you go thinking that law is crazy think again! Next thing you’ll be saying is you wish that 12 year olds can have sex!
2007-01-26 09:44:36 · answer #6 · answered by starz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Instead of trying to run away from the problem (exactly what leaving town, the state or the country would be, with or without your girlfriend) you should try talking to her parents. If they won't see you, write them a letter.
Tell them that you love their daughter. That you didn't realise she was so young (but really, in EIGHT MONTHS it never came up??? Doesn't she still go to school?). That you want to stand by her and your baby. Also, you need to stop seeing her behind their backs. That shows a very immature attitude on both your parts. You need to act like adults if you want to be treated like adults. At 26 you ought to know how to act like an adult. You will have legal, financial responsibilities and legal rights with this baby. Time to step up and be a man.
2007-01-26 05:07:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Get ready for a lawsuit. And how could you not tell that your girlfriend was ELEVEN years younger than you?
As for going somewhere where there isn't a stat rape charge, don't even think about Canada or Europe. They have the same laws. I think you need to stay away and come back when she is 21.
2007-01-26 07:25:44 · answer #8 · answered by bpbjess 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
someone can replace in the experience that they are keen to modify. in case you do like underage ladies, you go with to get your self out of our surroundings that they are in. in the experience that your forcing the females, its even worse. My own opinion is that you ought to be in penal complicated. Underage ladies don't have a clue, they only imagine its "cool" to be with an older guy, yet its PERVERTED. Get your self help. Why ought to ladies ought to bypass by ability of with that because of your selfishness? Technically i must be telling you the same component. You lost all of your possibilities along with your girlfriend. Be smarter and under no circumstances do this again.
2016-10-16 03:34:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need a good lawyer, guy. I've seen this same story too often. The girl knows she's underage and knows better but it's never her fault. It rarely ends well.
Some people are misreading what you are saying: you want to run away WITH her, don't you? Then you're going to go from rape to kidnapping. This isn't a romantic movie, this is real life. I'm sorry, I just don't see a good outcome whatever you do.
2007-01-26 05:38:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋