What do you tell a spouse who wants multiple sex partners, while still being married to you?

Answer 1

sign here and here, DIVORCE!!!!!****

Answer 2

Would the same rule apply to you? How would HE feel about YOU having multiple sex partners while still being married to HIM? Or is that what he's hoping for to begin with? A swinging lifestyle? If a couple decides AS A COUPLE that they want to have 3somes, 4somes, moresomes, swinger parties, etc etc. then this is still America. If you're doing it AS A COUPLE then whatever consenting adults do with other consenting adults is their business. These days it's not uncommon for married couples to cut loose every once in a while and mix it up. Suburbia is a lot kinkier after the kids fall asleep than people realize these days!

But if you are 100% against the idea of having an open marriage, and if your husband is insisting he wants a sex life that doesn't include you, then divorce is your only real option here. It's probably pretty unlikely that he won't pursue his desires just because you don't give him the permission, and if he's having sex with other people than your risk of disease and HIV is dramatically increased. No matter how safe he plays it. I don't know if you two have children, but any man that doesn't put his family first is no man at all. And I don't know very many 80 year old men who die proud and happy about how they chose to walk out on their family because casual sex was more important.

Answer 3

Well if you are NOT into multiple partners then I'd have to say you do need to sit down and talk with her. This being as there are many many things that can happen. If you tell her NO, and she really truly wants multiple partners she will most likely go behind your back. So you might want to consider her request for multiple partners. Now does she want multiple as in men or women or a combination of both? This would play a part too. You might also want to consider allowing her to do this withOUT you being involved. I know, I know NO man wants this to happen. BUT whats the very worst that can come of this. My opinion is the worst is a divorce. So if this is do able, then look at it. Good Luck either way.

Answer 4

That all depends on how you feel about it. If it's okay with you, talk about rules and whether you can join or go have multiple sex partners of your own....if you are not into this, then you still definately need to have a long talk and get this cleared up....If I were in your shoes, I would want to know the reasons behind the spouse wanting to go in this direction.

Answer 5

I will tell you what I did when my husband brought this same topic up. I attempted several times to tell him no but in a fun way as to not cause undue stress on our relationship. Once I realized he was not getting it and was still suggesting the idea or making comments about it I finally told him, "I will not be a part of it and want nothing to do with it. That is not something that I want in my home. I can only speak for myself so if you want to look elsewhere that is your choice but know that in doing so you have also made the choice to be a single man again because I will not tolerate that. If I am not enough woman to keep you satisfied, then perhaps you should look else where." Needless to say... a few months later he did just that and somehow that it was funner to do it directly in front of me as if I was to cheer him on for doing such a great job. We are now divocred. :)

Answer 6

You have many answers posted. Multiple sex partners is not for everyone, but polyamory and non-monogamy are very common today. Unlike what is taught in churches, sex is not a sin. Sex was given by God to be enjoyed. Man, not God, made sex a sin to control people.

Please read the information I am providing below. It will take some reading, but these sites are written by theologians as well as scientific research people.

In the end you must make up your own mind, but at least do so with some knowledge of what you are deciding.

Answer 7

I have a real problem with this and for the life of me, I can't understand how you can claim to love your partner and want to have sex with someone else. That just goes against everything I know of love and trust.

I'm sorry if this has happened to you. I would think that if you said no, that your partner would probably go outside the marriage anyway to have sex with someone else and try to keep it from you. So, it's a catch-22. Either you allow it and become terribly unhappy and depressed or you say no and have to wonder if it's going on anyway.

I hate divorce with a passion and I seldom would advise that route, but I don't think that I could live with either of those options. Maybe counseling? I don't know.

Good luck and God bless!

Answer 8

If you are OK with it, say "yes."
If you are not OK with it, say "no."

Lots of people have fantasies about multiple sex partners. Some fantasies are do-able, and some are not. Which one is this for you? Don't let yourself be talked into something you know will hurt you emotionally or undermine your relationship.If your partner insists on having multiple partners and you are not OK with that, it's time to cut your losses and move along.

Answer 9

tell him no, don't compromise your belief's for this, if he isn't happy with u he can go on down the road, even if u did give into what he is asking, it would only open the door for more things, and he may fall in love with one of those sex partners and leave u anyway. what he is saying to u is that u aren't enough anymore, it's more or less an insult to u. eventually he will leave u anyway seems he isn't happy with u, but that's his problem, don't sacrifice your morals to keep him, as he will only find something else later on he needs.

Answer 10

that's asking for problems?

no?

can i watch?

it all depends on what you're into if you're down with polygamy and the like then go for it,
personally i wouldn't share my fiance' with anyone,regardless
it's just a breeding ground for trouble,mistrust,jealousy,disease possibilities,marriage is SUPPOSED to be between two people,a man and a woman
if your spouse wants multiple sex partners and isn't willing to see your side then i suggest you divorce them,then they can have all the partners they want and you can find someone better

that's all i hafta say about that

Answer 11

tell her. yet, do it in a fashion that isn't any longer over-emotional. "My call is so-and -so, and that i'm isolating with my spouse because she become fascinated about an affair consisting of your husband. I hate to allow you to recognize this, yet i might want to wish to understand if it become me." Or some thing like that. i might want to surely want to understand, surprisingly if I had children with someone that become drowsing with some different person. What if a ailment become decreased in length by technique of the better 1/2 and then become given to the youngsters?